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  • Ezekiel Bathfire
    Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
    Christ's Rottweiler
     
    • Jan 2008
    • 22888
    #1

    6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

    A great day of celebration, God, The Almighty, started work on the Creation of the heavens and the Earth and all that is in it 6,014 years ago. We know this as a fact as examination of The Bible tells us so. The math is hard and takes a long time and it is fortunate that Archbishop Ussher saved us the trouble.In Annales veteris testamenti, a prima mundi origine deducti (Annals of the Old Testament, Deduced from the First Origins of the World), James Ussher, a 17th century Bishop, deduced that the first day of creation began at nightfall preceding Sunday, Oct 23, 4004 BC.

    Fact: using biblical genealogy and the reign of Kings, he calculated that the earth began at 6pm, October 23, 4004 BC.

    Look around you, in marvel and wonder at His Skill.
    Last edited by Ezekiel Bathfire; 10-24-2010, 12:06 PM.
    sigpic


    “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

    Author of such illuminating essays as,
    Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.
    Tags: None
    • Talitha
      Deaconess
      Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
      True Christian™
      • Apr 2026
      • 15118
      #2
      Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

      HAPPY BIRTHDAY WORLD!

      It just goes to prove those Evilutionairies wrong.
      How could the world have a 6,014th Birthday if it were billions of years old?

      Sister Talitha

      Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


      HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
      being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41


        Comment

        • John Scopes
          Unsaved Trash, Monkey worshiping Darwinista
          • Sep 2009
          • 666
          #3
          Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

          Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
          James Ussher, a 17th century Bishop, deduced that the first day of creation began at nightfall preceding Sunday, Oct 23, 4004 BC.
          I certainly am not challenging the veracity of your statements sir, however I do have one small point of scientific confusion.

          If the sun and earth did not yet exist, how could there be "nightfall" yet ? This in addition to the fact that Pope Gregory had not been born and created the calendar on which these calculations are based.

          I look forward to your considered response and subsequent clarifications.
          sigpic
          “Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.” Charles Darwin The Descent of Man (1871)

            Comment

            • Ezekiel Bathfire
              Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
              Christ's Rottweiler
               
              • Jan 2008
              • 22888
              #4
              Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

              Sir, you are a nit-picker. The good Bishop was relating the time of creation to the time in which he wrote so people like True Christians(tm) could give thanks at the appropriate time.

              As far as any pope is concerned, I would ignore anything he has to say, it will only lead to an eternity in Hell.
              sigpic


              “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

              Author of such illuminating essays as,
              Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                Comment

                • WinnerNotSinner
                  Friendliest Fellow in all of Freehold
                  True Christian™
                  • Jun 2010
                  • 951
                  #5
                  Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                  6
                  A woman came up to me the other day, 12/6/2016 and said:
                  "But Mr. Winner, if GOD loves everyone then why is there so much suffering in the world?"

                  Because GOD doesn't love everyone. Too many people have this absurd idea in their heads that GOD is all loving.
                  If he was all loving, then murderers, thieves and homosexuals would be waiting for you in Heaven.

                  GOD doesn't open his gate to just anyone. Being a True Christian™ is like a Queue Jump ticket at Disney, we are guaranteed a ride with JESUS.

                    Comment

                    • David Micheal
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Aug 2010
                      • 207
                      #6
                      Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                      Happy Birthhday World! 6,014 years and counting!



                      We all know the earth isn't billions of years old like the lieberals and the atheists want us to think. We know the truth!

                        Comment

                        • Bob4God
                          Moderator
                          Arms Dealer for CHRIST
                          Hands folded for Jesus
                           
                          • Apr 2008
                          • 5274
                          #7
                          Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                          It makes me feel an almost smug sense of contentment to know that I am an expert in geology, paleontology, and biology, and that I didn't have to spend years pouring my money down a rat hole in some fancy university.

                          Just give me the Bible and I can prove any scientist wrong any day of the week.
                          sigpic
                          The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
                          - Proverbs 15:3

                          CHILDREN'S STORY: TIMMY ON TRIAL


                          CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


                            Comment

                            • Jo Freddie
                              Unsaved trash
                              Hateful God mocking pirate
                              • Apr 2009
                              • 6339
                              #8
                              Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!


                              The world is only 5005 years old.
                              Posted via Pasta

                              True Pastafarian™

                              May my Sauce be with you!
                              Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
                              Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
                              The Loose Canon - HTML version
                              Loose Canon Fan Page
                              North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
                              I have been to The Volcano!

                                Comment

                                • Ezekiel Bathfire
                                  Pastor for Diversity and Tolerance
                                  Christ's Rottweiler
                                   
                                  • Jan 2008
                                  • 22888
                                  #9
                                  Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                  You have Scripture for that?
                                  sigpic


                                  “We must reassert that the essence of Christianity is the love of obedience to God’s Laws and that how that complete obedience is used or implemented does not concern us.”

                                  Author of such illuminating essays as,
                                  Map of the Known World; Periodic Table of Elements; The History of Linguistics; The Errors of Wicca; Dolphins and Evolution; The History of Landover (The Apology); Landover and the Civil War; 2000 Racial Slurs.

                                    Comment

                                    • Jo Freddie
                                      Unsaved trash
                                      Hateful God mocking pirate
                                      • Apr 2009
                                      • 6339
                                      #10
                                      Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                      Originally posted by Ezekiel Bathfire View Post
                                      You have Scripture for that?
                                      Yes
                                      Originally posted by The Gospel
                                      A Condensed History of the World
                                      Five Thousand Years Ago:

                                      The Beginning

                                      THE FLYING SPAGHETTI MONSTER created the universe and a bunch of planets, including Earth.
                                      As The Gospel was a divine revelation given to the Great Prophet in 2005 and it is now 2010 that makes the world 5005 years old.
                                      Posted via Pasta

                                      True Pastafarian™

                                      May my Sauce be with you!
                                      Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
                                      Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
                                      The Loose Canon - HTML version
                                      Loose Canon Fan Page
                                      North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
                                      I have been to The Volcano!

                                        Comment

                                        • handmaiden
                                          Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
                                          True Christian™
                                          • May 2010
                                          • 11450
                                          #11
                                          Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                          I am so stumped. I have no idea of what to get it. Shopping for some people or planets can be so frustrating.




                                          Thinking Hardedly Yours,

                                          Handmaiden
                                          His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                                          Guns For God and the Economy

                                            Comment

                                            • Sentinel
                                              Confirmed Enemy of God
                                              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                                              • Oct 2010
                                              • 2
                                              #12
                                              Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                              "America is a CHRISTIAN nation, it used to be a CHRISTIAN nation and it will ALWAYS be a CHRISTIAN nation. Praise JESUS and rise up against the MUSLIM invaders"

                                              What about the days of the cherokee and other such tribes?

                                                Comment

                                                • BelieverInGod
                                                  Fourm Member
                                                  Forum Member
                                                  • Feb 2010
                                                  • 9269
                                                  #13
                                                  Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                                  I baked a cake!

                                                  Drama queen

                                                    Comment

                                                    • James R Miller
                                                      Unsaved trash
                                                      • Oct 2010
                                                      • 58
                                                      #14
                                                      Re: 6,014 years old: Happy Birthday World!

                                                      Originally posted by Talitha View Post
                                                      HAPPY BIRTHDAY WORLD!

                                                      It just goes to prove those Evilutionairies wrong.
                                                      How could the world have a 6,014th Birthday if it were billions of years old?
                                                      They don't believe it's 6,014 years old.

                                                        Comment

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