Boys and Balls... help needed...

[Youth Minister Harry]

I was recently asked by a Pastor to help introduce sports into the lives of some of the young men in my boy's choir to help prevent any outbreaks of faggotry. I discovered that our church parking lot has an old basketball ring affixed to a 10 foot metal stick. The pastor insisted it was installed for white use, and has never been used for any negroid purposes.

At this point, I just need advice on coaching young boys... particularly those who seem strangely terrified of men and have been refusing to make eye contact with adults since last month's RV retreat in which the boys and I became suddenly stranded in my 1984 Diesel Pusher RV somewhere in the Rio Grande Valley.

Any advice or help on coaching boy's sports is greatly appreciated. To start with, I'm reading this:

Also, I need to get rid of a 1984 Diesel Pusher.
Motivated seller. Runs great!

Thanks in advance for any help you might offer!


Cleansed In The Blood Of The Lamb,
Harry Lester

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

This seems like a worthy cause, we don't want another homerism pandemic like in '08, but I don't feel safe leaving my children in the hands of someone who is not yet a True Christian™.

However, if I am allowed to watch the sessions then we might be able to work it out. Would this be allowed, or do you need to be alone with the children away from the distractions and pressure watching parents bring?

Also do the boys have to provide their own balls, or can they play with yours?

[Hyperion]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

This seems like a worthy cause, we don't want another homerism pandemic like in '08, but I don't feel safe leaving my children in the hands of someone who is not yet a True Christian™.

However, if I am allowed to watch the sessions then we might be able to work it out. Would this be allowed, or do you need to be alone with the children away from the distractions and pressure watching parents bring?

Also do the boys have to provide their own balls, or can they play with yours?

Few questions about your post.
Are you saying you would trust someone because of their post count on an online forum community?

Secondly, am I the only one that sees a double meaning in OP's post?

[James Hutchins]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

Few questions about your post.
Are you saying you would trust someone because of their post count on an online forum community?

Secondly, am I the only one that sees a double meaning in OP's post?

No where does he say anythng abut post count. He states he does not trust anyone who is not a True Christian(tm).Like you, for example

This:

..............Would this be allowed, or do you need to .........

is a question, with two possible responses (notice the use of 'or'). So, yes, I think it is pretty obvoius.

[Youth Minister Harry]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

This seems like a worthy cause, we don't want another homerism pandemic like in '08, but I don't feel safe leaving my children in the hands of someone who is not yet a True Christian™.

However, if I am allowed to watch the sessions then we might be able to work it out. Would this be allowed, or do you need to be alone with the children away from the distractions and pressure watching parents bring?

Also do the boys have to provide their own balls, or can they play with yours?

Thank you so much for the feedback. While I may not yet be a True Christian™, I think you'll find that I may be on the path to becoming one. Praise God! I can certainly understand your concern in this matter. Know, also, that as I do not reside in Freehold at this time, the outreach I offer is being made to the local Independent Fundamentalist Baptist children at 7th Baptist Church in Shepherd, Texas. To work with the boys in Freehold, though, I would personally run on my barefoot feet from Texas to Iowa for the opportunity (if invited, of course)!

To answer your question about the parents watching, I do prefer to work alone with the children as you predicted, however on rare occasion in the past I have been joined by a father or uncle or neighbor who assures me that he fully understands my methods and is himself still young enough to participate in them. Being a True Christian™, I know you are more than qualified, and I would be honored and delighted to have you participate in any private coaching sessions or retreats I organize in the future. If you are ever down this way on missionary, I'll joyfully provide you with living quarters on your visit as well.

Yours In The Fresh Flowing Blood Of Jesus Christ,
Harry Lester

[Nathan B. Forrest]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

Few questions about your post.
Are you saying you would trust someone because of their post count on an online forum community?

Secondly, am I the only one that sees a double meaning in OP's post?

A few questions about you.
Who are you? We don't know because you didn't take the time and common courtesy to introduce yourself in our introduction forum, as is customary. So why don't you head on over there and make an intro thread so that we may greet you properly?

~ Nate

[Youth Minister Harry]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

A few questions about you.
Who are you? We don't know because you didn't take the time and common courtesy to introduce yourself in our introduction forum, as is customary. So why don't you head on over there and make an intro thread so that we may greet you properly?

~ Nate

Thank you for the kind words. I have made an introduction in the introductions forum at the following link:

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=59461


Washed In His Holy Blood Of His Love,
Harry Lester

[Hyperion]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

Thank you for the kind words. I have made an introduction in the introductions forum at the following link:

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=59461


Washed In His Holy Blood Of His Love,
Harry Lester

Hey genius, I'm pretty sure he was talking to me, seeing as how he quoted my post.

[Youth Minister Harry]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

Hey genius, I'm pretty sure he was talking to me, seeing as how he quoted my post.

Aha! I thought that was a bit strange. Thank you for pointing that out. These textroom computer chats are all confusing as heck! I can barely keep up with all the emails and digital Adult Pass ID's and what not required to log into everything. I'll get it figured soon enough! Praise God!

Immersed In His Ever-Loving Blood Of Salvation,
Harry Lester

[ExGay Alex]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

The church has an excellent recreation area, but I live in a pretty nice area, too. As a True Christian, I could supervise these activities and invite the boys over to my place afterwards to cool down with drinks and Christian videos. My basement has a large, finished area with a big fridge and since my house is on the hillside, it opens in the back to my large basketball court. In other words, Harry, you all can play there.

When you're finished with them, if the boys want to head for my house, they could come in my back door and then I'll treat them to something nice.

Sports is a good way to prevent homerism and the program may have some promise.

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

To work with the boys in Freehold, though, I would personally run on my barefoot feet from Texas to Iowa for the opportunity (if invited, of course)!

Ahh, well that's a catch, nobody can enter Freehold unless they are a verified True Christian™ and are 110% dedicated to serving the LORD. I admire your enthusiasm, but have patience Brother (Lamentations 3:25). Keep working tirelessly on those boys in Texas and then when the DoF accept you you can make the decision whether to come to GOD's Favourite Community.

To answer your question about the parents watching, I do prefer to work alone with the children as you predicted, however on rare occasion in the past I have been joined by a father or uncle or neighbor who assures me that he fully understands my methods and is himself still young enough to participate in them.

Fully understood and I fully understand. I would leave you to your own devices as I don't know the first thing about coaching basketball!

Being a True Christian™, I know you are more than qualified, and I would be honored and delighted to have you participate in any private coaching sessions or retreats I organize in the future. If you are ever down this way on missionary, I'll joyfully provide you with living quarters on your visit as well.

I may take you upon that offer, as I may be passing through Texas on missionary next month.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

I don't know whether this is of any help - but when I was a teenager we used to go on safari in Africa. It was a great learning curve: until you visit their country you don't know just how inferior they really are.

Is there any sort of sports-themed safari experience available in Mexico?

..just curious

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

I don't know whether this is of any help - but when I was a teenager we used to go on safari in Africa. It was a great learning curve: until you visit their country you don't know just how inferior they really are.

Is there any sort of sports-themed safari experience available in Mexico?

..just curious

I think it's called 'Narcos' or something. More of a gun sport than a ball sport though.

[MitzaLizalor]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

I think it's called 'Narcos' or something. More of a gun sport than a ball sport though.

oh - paintball? that could be fun!

[Lost Sheep McUinnean]

Re: Boys and Balls... help needed...

oh - paintball? that could be fun!

More like 'leadball' really.

You get sore losers at it too. Very sore. But they don't usually say much after they've lost.