[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

Ummm, I'm still in school and have a loooong way to go. I'm sure there are lots of lovely True Christian women where you are, sir, who would love to do nothing more than slave in your kitchen. There is no excuse for lingering in bachelorhood JiL, do your duty to Jesus!

So what if you're still in school? There's schools around here you can attend. How much schooling do you need to be a proper TC(tm) housewife anyway?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

No no, it often doesn't appear in many people until their early 20's (like me ) and to varying degrees. I can have some regular milk, just not a whole bowl full. And God gave man the skills to make soy and lactose-free milk so it's all good.

Keep up with the news, woman! Satan gave the Communists the recipe for soy milk so they could use it to debauch America's youth and turn them into limp-wristed sissies who'd rather sit around watching Brokeback Mountain than go and kill a towelhead for Christ!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

Thank you for the comforting words, Pastor. I feel brighter and filled with more fear already!

GOOD! You are beginning to understand the message of our LORD!

There are some (East) Indian people in my family on my father's side. I've never met them before but I'm sure they're nice people and not responsible for my lactose troubles.

Damn dotheads! I knew it. They worship cows, so GOD smites them with lactose intolerance. Mystery solved!

I don't think that I've tithed enough (ie at all) to earn such a glorious honour brother. No need to jinx me now!

Women will never sit near JESUS. The most you can hope for is to enter heaven every morning through the servant's entrance and do the bidding of the GODLY all day.

Ummm, I'm still in school and have a loooong way to go. I'm sure there are lots of lovely True Christian women where you are, sir, who would love to do nothing more than slave in your kitchen. There is no excuse for lingering in bachelorhood JiL, do your duty to Jesus!

Yes, JIL! You may have as many wives and concubines as you wish!

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

Yes, JIL! You may have as many wives and concubines as you wish!

I already have a few but if I buy that house in Apostle's Grove I'm looking at then I'll need a few more to help take care of the house. If nothing else I'll need them to tell the servants what to do.

I also need someone to cook my meals, none of my wives and concubines can cook that great and I refuse to have some messicant or nigra servant cook my meals.

[see_the_light]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

I already have a few but if I buy that house in Apostle's Grove I'm looking at then I'll need a few more to help take care of the house. If nothing else I'll need them to tell the servants what to do.

I also need someone to cook my meals, none of my wives and concubines can cook that great and I refuse to have some messicant or nigra servant cook my meals.

You do find favor in the eyes of GOD!

Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD

Proverbs 18:22

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

You do find favor in the eyes of GOD!

Whoso findeth a wife findeth a good thing, and obtaineth favour of the LORD

Proverbs 18:22

Indeed. But remember: When God favors you enough to give you a really nice house and multiple wives, don't blow it by not following His Word:

II Samuel 12:7-9: And Nathan said to David, Thou [art] the man. Thus saith the LORD God of Israel, I anointed thee king over Israel, and I delivered thee out of the hand of Saul; And I gave thee thy master's house, and thy master's wives into thy bosom, and gave thee the house of Israel and of Judah; and if [that had been] too little, I would moreover have given unto thee such and such things. Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the LORD, to do evil in his sight? thou hast killed Uriah the Hittite with the sword, and hast taken his wife [to be] thy wife, and hast slain him with the sword of the children of Ammon.

[see_the_light]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

Indeed. But remember: When God favors you enough to give you a really nice house and multiple wives, don't blow it by not following His Word:

II Samuel 12:7-9: And Nathan said to David, Thou [art] the man. Thus saith the LORD God of Israel, I anointed thee king over Israel, and I delivered thee out of the hand of Saul; And I gave thee thy master's house, and thy master's wives into thy bosom, and gave thee the house of Israel and of Judah; and if [that had been] too little, I would moreover have given unto thee such and such things. Wherefore hast thou despised the commandment of the LORD, to do evil in his sight? thou hast killed Uriah the Hittite with the sword, and hast taken his wife [to be] thy wife, and hast slain him with the sword of the children of Ammon.

INDEED

But the Faithful will see what he has multiplied.

Psalm 107:38

He blesseth them also, so that they are multiplied greatly; and suffereth not their cattle to decrease.


I PRAY TO JESUS OUR SAVIOUR THAT THAT MAY BE OUR BROTHER'S CASE!

[Arethusa]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

So what if you're still in school? There's schools around here you can attend. How much schooling do you need to be a proper TC(tm) housewife anyway?

I'm not really in grad school in order to become a housewife. I heard Ixi's free! Her av's kinda cute.

Keep up with the news, woman! Satan gave the Communists the recipe for soy milk so they could use it to debauch America's youth and turn them into limp-wristed sissies who'd rather sit around watching Brokeback Mountain than go and kill a towelhead for Christ!

I keep up with the news and I never heard about that news item. Are you sure about your sources? :|

Women will never sit near JESUS. The most you can hope for is to enter heaven every morning through the servant's entrance and do the bidding of the GODLY all day.

But what about my eternal rewards in heaven?

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

I'm not really in grad school in order to become a housewife. I heard Ixi's free! Her av's kinda cute.

What, they let her out? Since when?

I keep up with the news and I never heard about that news item. Are you sure about your sources? :|

Of course it's not in the news. Even ignoring the secular media's liberal bias, the invention of soy milk is hardly a new thing - it happened a while back, so why would it be in the news now?

But what about my eternal rewards in heaven?

I thought the joy and satisfaction of doing the bidding of the GODLY was its own reward, surely?

[Jesus is Lord]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

I'm not really in grad school in order to become a housewife.

You are a woman, your place is in the home. As a True Christian ™ woman I would think you'd know that.

I heard Ixi's free! Her av's kinda cute.

Ickky is an unsaved heathen and does not know her place as a woman in the least.

But what about my eternal rewards in heaven?

You will not get into Heaven, let alone get any eternal rewards, if you don't straighten up and marry a True Christian™ man and do all he says.

[see_the_light]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

You are a woman, your place is in the home. As a True Christian ™ woman I would think you'd know that.

Ickky is an unsaved heathen and does not know her place as a woman in the least.
You will not get into Heaven, let alone get any eternal rewards, if you don't straighten up and marry a True Christian™ man and do all he says.

Rightly said Brother.

She can take brother JIL or take her chances with satan... soon enough.

PRAISE THE LORD!

[Arethusa]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

I thought the joy and satisfaction of doing the bidding of the GODLY was its own reward, surely?

I thought heaven would be more relaxing. I suppose I won't be in the kitchen all the time, what with all the women and angels God has at his command already.

You will not get into Heaven, let alone get any eternal rewards, if you don't straighten up and marry a True Christian™ man and do all he says.

Oh, I'm on the look out for a True Christian man. I don't think the Lord approves of internet relationships, he prefers his followers to get together the old-fashioned way.

[see_the_light]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

Oh, I'm on the look out for a True Christian man. I don't think the Lord approves of internet relationships, he prefers his followers to get together the old-fashioned way.

PRAISE THE LORD! YOU HAVE SEEN THE LIGHT!

[TwinkBoy]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

WOW More Saved Than Thou!! Imagine that! Soybeans make people into homosexuals! Really? I realllyyy do NOT think so!! GAY people are BORN GAY because that IS the WAY "GOD" created them to be and that is the short version on that. Thinking that soybeans makes people gay is absolutely ridiculous and UN-informed.

Homosexuality is NOT a death-style. It IS a LIFE-style and one that one is born with. No one "learns" to be gay, sorry to disappoint some of you. Okkkkk I figured somewhere in here someone (not to mention in names, mind you) was going to raise the issue of Sodom and Gomorrah and homosexuality. Afterall, that is the PRIME example sighted by Christians who are anti-gay prejudice bigots! Sorry to use such strong language BUT that is just the way I feel and I ask everyone to RESPECT everyone's feelings including mine.

Now, regarding the Bible and homosexuality.....the Old Testament actually STATES why Sodom and Gomorrah were destroyed by "God" and it lists the "sins" of Sodom that got "God" to destroy it. Mind you, NOWHERE does the Bible say Sodom was destroyed because of homosexuality. Here...I'll sight the Bible for all of you who doubt:

Ezekiel 16:49-50 says: "Behold, this was the iniquity of thy sister Sodom, pride, fullness of bread, and abundance of idleness was in her and in her daughters, neither did she strengthen the hand of the poor and needy. And they were haughty, committed abomination before me; therefore I took them away as I saw good."

The NIV translates the sins of Sodom in this way in Ezekiel 16:49-50:

"Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen."

As you can see there is NO mention of homosexuality having been a "sin" of Sodom and Gomorrah.

Sigh....yawn....I rest my case!!

Love & Light,
Twink

[see_the_light]

Re: Yet again, homers buck the blame.

The NIV translates the sins of Sodom in this way in Ezekiel 16:49-50:

"Now this was the sin of your sister Sodom: She and her daughters were arrogant, overfed and unconcerned; they did not help the poor and needy. They were haughty and did detestable things before me. Therefore I did away with them as you have seen."

As you can see there is NO mention of homosexuality having been a "sin" of Sodom and Gomorrah.

Sigh....yawn....I rest my case!!

Love & Light,
Twink

The NIV stands for New Invented Verses.

THE LORD has ordered not a word changed,

The ABOMINATION is SODOMY you hell spawn gerbil!