[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

When manatees attack!

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Is the manatee hide anything like sealskin? Because I am thinking that if we tallowed it, we could have warm disguises in which to hunt next Helloween.

An interesting idea, but there is one slight flaw in the plan. I would fell pretty awful if, in the middle of the witch hunt, you accidentally got shot because someone in the Manatee Remediation Project™ mistook you for a manatee.

What do you do with these manatees? Can you make manatee burgers, or manatee steaks?

Mostly we sell the carcasses to Indian restaurants. I'm told that tandoori chicken tastes much better when made from manatee than from the house cat that they usually use.

[Nobar King]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

What do you do with these manatees? Can you make manatee burgers, or manatee steaks?

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Harpoon them. Then they can't get away.

Is the manatee hide anything like sealskin? Because I am thinking that if we tallowed it, we could have warm disguises in which to hunt next Helloween. Once emptied out and tanned, the manatee head looks large enough to make a full hood and head-covering.

These disguises could serve two purposes;

1.) The last thing the death-embracing wiccans would see would be some swaying dark apparition that would surely freeze them in their tracks,

and

2.) If any of the brave Landover™ hunters were spotted by outside authorities, they could flop to the ground on top of their firearms (concealing them), and would pass for manatees on a foraging expedition.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

An excellent point Brother Smith. If wolf hunting from a helicopter is good enough for Sarah Palin, then perhaps manatee hunting from the sky would work too.

This would be the perfect place to start.

[Wide-Open]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Don't mess this board up by trying to state facts. Fatcs are not allowed here.

To quote our beloved Pastor Deacon Fred: "Facts? You don't need so called 'facts' when you have Jesus on your side."

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

An excellent point Brother Smith. If wolf hunting from a helicopter is good enough for Sarah Palin, then perhaps manatee hunting from the sky would work too.

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Oh, that kind of harpoon. I thought you guys meant the Harpoon surface-to-surfact missile:

Which would, I admit, be rather cool, but it's probably too expensive unless we can take out a few hundred manatees with a single shot. We're getting pretty close to a deal on a surplus AC-130 gunship, though:

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Don't mess this board up by trying to state facts. Fatcs are not allowed here.

Except True Biblical Facts that is Mind you, jessev needs to be disabused of his godless ways.

[999Dev]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Just so you know, I hope you realize that it's highly illegal to kill dolphins or manatees in the United States. Whether you choose to believe this or care about it is your concern.

On another matter, there is no evidence that manatees actually eat meat at all.You can speculate it. And blame them for something happening. But based on observation, that's never been seen. It is true that they will wade up onto a shore to get at some of the grass. But they cannot travel over land very well at all. And also, manatees are not at all related to pigs. They're more closely related to elephants and the Hyrax.

Also, if you actually managed to obtain several dolphins (which I have reason to disbelieve unless somehow recieved through the black market), it's absurd for someone to believe that sticking a dolphin out in the desert proves anything. That's like if someone put you out in the antarctic without clothes. See how long you would survive there. Evolution is not just a spontaneous thing that happens to a creature in a few minutes. It's never been suggested that it ever has been. And dolphins would not die of suffocation, but rather by dehydration and by the crushing of their internal organs. That's typically what kills most whales and dolphins that beach themselves.

I have studied dolphins quite extensively. I know quite a bit about them. Please try reading things from more credible sources than 40 year old stories from a 3rd world country's village. That is not proof of anything at all.

Don't mess this board up by trying to state facts. Fatcs are not allowed here.

[TC Patriot]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

One of these hunnies would do the trick.


It would blow those nasty beasties to smithereens. The shoulder launched stinger is a Godly killing machine.

I agree with the Pastor. A harpoon would be best but I do think a 50. cal would be good to have in case they attack the boat.



I have always liked harpoons!

[Ahimaaz Smith]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Just so you know, I hope you realize that it's highly illegal to kill dolphins or manatees in the United States.

Thanks for the head's up. We'll be extra careful not to get caught, now.

It is true that they will wade up onto a shore to get at some of the grass. But they cannot travel over land very well at all.

That's what they want you to believe. We know better.

I have studied dolphins quite extensively. I know quite a bit about them. Please try reading things from more credible sources than 40 year old stories from a 3rd world country's village. That is not proof of anything at all.

Interesting. Which university did you get your PhD from?

The 'black market' does not mean a market that is black.

We know very well what a black market is. We used to have a slave market here in Freehold, until the FBI shut it down.

Just being curious, who is the mayor of Freehold?

Freehold is unincorporated, so we have no mayor.

I can't seem to find out where Freehold is in Iowa, I'm afraid.

Go to any decent research library and ask to see pre-1973 maps, and you'll find Freehold. We went to a lot of trouble suing the mapmakers until they agreed to take Freehold off the maps. Idiots kept showing up to debate us in person, and that was driving the ammunition budget of the Freehold Police Department through the roof.

And if I may ask, can you tell me which code of the law allows you to do such things?

Sure. It's all in Genesis 1:26-30:

And God said, Let us make man in our image, after our likeness: and let them have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over the cattle, and over all the earth, and over every creeping thing that creepeth upon the earth. So God created man in his own image, in the image of God created he him; male and female created he them. And God blessed them, and God said unto them, Be fruitful, and multiply, and replenish the earth, and subdue it: and have dominion over the fish of the sea, and over the fowl of the air, and over every living thing that moveth upon the earth. And God said, Behold.... to every beast of the earth, and to every fowl of the air, and to every thing that creepeth upon the earth, wherein there is life, I have given every green herb for meat: and it was so.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Harpoon them. Then they can't get away.

This is true of course Pastor but there is a certain satisfaction that comes with shooting then with a high sped gat gun.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Would it be better to shoot them or harpoon them?

Harpoon them. Then they can't get away.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Stop Manatees Now!

Just being curious, who is the mayor of Freehold? I can't seem to find out where Freehold is in Iowa, I'm afraid. And if I may ask, can you tell me which code of the law allows you to do such things? I tried to research it a little and could only find this:

Freehold is private property so we do what the Bible tells us to do. Secular laws tell people what they CANNOT do, not what they CAN do. We obey secular laws when we have to leave the compound.