[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

And would you care to tell me just what percentage of the worlds top chefs are NOT men?

0%

Mind you that has more to do with sexual inequalities in the work place, but the point still stands that plenty of men like to cook

You know that sort of statement is the sort of thing that Demoncrats and fluffy-bunny False Christians believe. The truth of the matter is somewhat more prosaic. God puts man in charge of women for a reason – brain-size.

A woman’s place is in the kitchen of her home where a man might be around to supervise. I’m sure you would not want

(a) your wife employed
(b) her out until all hours of the night
(c ) to think, even for one moment, that she had any authority to tell male sous-chefs or waiters what to do
(d) her to give herself a headache thinking of new recipes on her own without the women’s church group to consult
(e) expect her to create new and complex dishes for a variety of other men.
(f) out touching things at that time of the month and
(h) deserting your many children.

No sir, lest you forget, a woman’s place is in the … (complete this well-known phrase or saying.)

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

What kind of man eats salad?

It will be summer soon, a salad is nice in summer, and being confidant in my sexuality I do not fear some foods in the way that one less confident might do

Worse than that, what kind of man posts recipes?!!?

And would you care to tell me just what percentage of the worlds top chefs are NOT men? Mind you that has more to do with sexual inequalities in the work place, but the point still stands that plenty of men like to cook

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Re: Cumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

Perhaps a good move Pastor. Who knows what your neighbor truly means by the word "pickle" and our Lord has tasked us with being our brother's keeper.

That neighbor's cucumber plants were starting to get tall, so I did like I said and sprayed them real good with Round-Up late Thursday night. By yesterday morning, they were dead.

I don't know who saw me and ratted me out, but he came over today banging on my door and demanding to know why I killed his cucumbers. I explained everything, and the look on his face was priceless. He looked like he didn't know whether to crack up laughing or punch me.

He told me I was crazy. Well, I'm not the one growing tough skinned phallic vegetables in the sight of a vengeful God. THAT'S crazy.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

What kind of man eats salad?

Worse than that, what kind of man posts recipes?!!?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

What kind of man eats salad?

As disgusting as it is to relate with atheists "tossing the salad" doesn't refer to a Godly, nutritious meal.

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

What kind of man eats salad?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

Nothing at all wrong with the cucumber, and it can be used to make a very nice Pasta salad....

Cucumber Pasta Salad
INGREDIENTS

* 30 g rotelle pasta
* 4 English cucumbers - peeled, quartered and chopped
* 4 stalks celery, chopped
* 1 large onion, chopped
* 240 g creamy salad dressing
* 235 ml buttermilk
* 4 g celery seed

DIRECTIONS

1. Bring a large pot of lightly salted water to a boil. Add pasta and cook for 8 to 10 minutes or until al dente; drain.
2. In large bowl, combine pasta, cucumber, celery and onion. In small bowl, combine dressing, buttermilk and celery seed. Toss salad with dressing and serve.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

I don't think you'll get any serious takers, Bobby Joe. Your argument is air-tight. They're just going to ignore it and hope it goes away.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

Looks like it Pastor. Still no reply from the monkey worships.

Looks like it checkmate for Darwin.

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

I want to bump this up. The reward still stands atheist, secularists, deists and non-Christian theists.

Any takers?

I don't think you'll get any serious takers, Bobby Joe. Your argument is air-tight. They're just going to ignore it and hope it goes away.

Pastor Billy-Reuben

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

I am willing to offer a $10,000 USD reward to any secularist who can prove my arguement wrong.

Give it your best shot Darwnists.

I want to bump this up. The reward still stands atheist, secularists, deists and non-Christian theists.

Any takers?

[Mrs. Robert Roberts]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

First of all, it's not up to a woman to question GOD's work or spend too much time thinking about cucumbers.

However, it is a coincidence because this was exactly the subject of my Doctoral dissertation! I proved that it would have been impossible to get enough food on the ark to feed any of the animals, and there wasn't enough manpower....or shovels for that matter...to clean up after them. So the only possibility is that GOD filled their bellies with manna from Heaven which, as we all know, is evacuated as rainbows.

So none of the animals were hungry, everyone got along, and even the two flies slept for the entire journey because GOD suspended aging on the ark. Only the evil creatures that weren't specified in the float plan suffered and drowned for forty days and forty nights. Finally some white doves woke up and started flying around until one day they returned with an olive branch.

Fortunately my dissertation ended before I had to explain how an olive tree got on top of Mt. Ararat, but I can safely say it was a miracle as well!

PRAISE!

Well that explains it!
Thank you for pointing that out Pastor.
I don't think I'll be planting cucumbers this year, just to be safe.
I'll replace them with zucchini.

Yours in Christ,
Mrs. Robert Roberts

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

That's true.
I'm wondering though, how did Noah feed all the herbivores on the Ark?
I still say the devil snuck a cucumber in there.

First of all, it's not up to a woman to question GOD's work or spend too much time thinking about cucumbers.

However, it is a coincidence because this was exactly the subject of my Doctoral dissertation! I proved that it would have been impossible to get enough food on the ark to feed any of the animals, and there wasn't enough manpower....or shovels for that matter...to clean up after them. So the only possibility is that GOD filled their bellies with manna from Heaven which, as we all know, is evacuated as rainbows.

So none of the animals were hungry, everyone got along, and even the two flies slept for the entire journey because GOD suspended aging on the ark. Only the evil creatures that weren't specified in the float plan suffered and drowned for forty days and forty nights. Finally some white doves woke up and started flying around until one day they returned with an olive branch.

Fortunately my dissertation ended before I had to explain how an olive tree got on top of Mt. Ararat, but I can safely say it was a miracle as well!

PRAISE!

[Mrs. Robert Roberts]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

That's true.
I'm wondering though, how did Noah feed all the herbivores on the Ark?
I still say the devil snuck a cucumber in there.

[Meek and Humble]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

When God instructed Noah to build the Ark and gather two of every species to take on the journey, did He include cucumbers? Or was that something the devil scurried onboard at the last minute under cover? Just a thought.

Silly woman, cucumbers aren't animals! Plant life was somehow made immune to the flood by the power of God.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Cucumber, the proof of God’s existence Atheists

Uh...that's not what I said. Back what up with scripture?? All I said is that humans are the only primates who cultivate cucumbers, so of course we're the only ones that eat them! Primates in zoos are often given vegetables like that, so I guess they do eat them, but only in captivity.

Maybe I just don't understand what the point of this post is...

Are you trying to say that monkeys should be growing things? I think that's pretty mean. They're just dumb animals after all...