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  • Daisy Mae Johnson
    The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
    Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
    aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 15708

    #1

    Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

    Best Caption wins an Easter Ham medal!




    Good luck and remember JESUS is watching you.
    sigpic

    Tweet me Here
    My GODLY Bio Here
  • OliveOilMom
    Unsaved trash
     
    • Mar 2012
    • 59

    #2
    Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

    1. Which came first, the chicken or the egg?

    Neither! SALVATION through FAITH in CHRIST!


    2. Only athiests claim that eggs are bad for your heart!


    3. JESUS! Hatching SALVATION since Easter Sunday, 33 AD.


    I hope it was ok to put three. I couldn't decide which one I liked best.

    Comment

    • Levi Jones
      Pastor of Hermeneutics and Apologetics
      Bathed in Christ's Precious Blood
      Apostle to the Cactuses, Tumbleweeds and Jackrabbits
       
      • Jul 2009
      • 13930

      #3
      Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

      Bock, cluck, cluck, bock, bock, bock, bock.. I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man comes unto the Father, but by me.
      Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.

      Comment

      • Benjamin Over
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
        • Nov 2011
        • 81

        #4
        Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

        This caption will win the hearts of those non-English speaking inhumane Chinks:

        "Y yu no love JESUS long time"

        Comment

        • WWJDnow
          True Christian™
          True Christian™
          • Aug 2009
          • 6312

          #5
          Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

          If a son shall ask bread of any of you that is a father, will he give him a stone? or if he ask a fish, will he for a fish give him a serpent? Or if he shall ask an egg, will he offer him a scorpion? If ye then, being evil, know how to give good gifts unto your children: how much more shall your heavenly Father give the Holy Spirit to them that ask him? Luke 11:11-13
          The Christian Right: The Only Right Way to Be a Christian!

          Comment

          • Noah Sole
            True Christian™
            True Christian™
            • Feb 2012
            • 865

            #6
            Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

            Isaiah 59:5
            They hatch cockatrice' eggs, and weave the spider's web: he that eateth of their eggs dieth, and that which is crushed breaketh out into a viper.

            It doesn't make much sense to me but it mentions eggs and hatching
            Genesis 7:5
            And Noah did according unto all that the LORD commanded him.


            John 8:32
            And ye shall know the truth, and the truth shall make you free.


            sigpic

            Comment

            • Didymus Much
              Unsaved trash, Arrogant Atheist Dick
              • Jun 2010
              • 14079

              #7
              Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

              "Be ye not yolked together with unbelievers..."

              Comment

              • Catherine Moore
                Forum Member
                Forum Member
                • Feb 2012
                • 315

                #8
                Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                Originally posted by Didymus Much View Post
                "Be ye not yolked together with unbelievers..."

                Oh dear.

                Comment

                • David Rothstein
                  Unsaved trash, Christ-killing joo
                  • Sep 2010
                  • 95

                  #9
                  Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                  Jesus: 2000 Years And Still Waiting.
                  Acts 14:2 But the unbelieving Jews stirred up the Gentiles, and made their minds evil affected against the brethren.

                  Comment

                  • Mistress Cookie
                    Petite pearl of Baptist womanhood
                    True Christian™
                    • Jul 2008
                    • 6790

                    #10
                    Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!


                    "Boo! CAUGHT you!"

                    Comment

                    • Catherine Moore
                      Forum Member
                      Forum Member
                      • Feb 2012
                      • 315

                      #11
                      Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                      Jesus: Winning at Hide and Seek since 0

                      Comment

                      • handmaiden
                        Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
                        True Christian™
                        • May 2010
                        • 11406

                        #12
                        Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                        Originally posted by Daisy Mae Johnson View Post




                        Jesus can fix anything!

                        __________________________________________________ ________


                        Broken heart? Broken life? High cholesterol?

                        Let Jesus into your life!
                        __________________________________________________ ______



                        The Easter Bunny never brought anyone Salvation.


                        __________________________________________________ ______



                        They broke His Body, but He came back! You, too can be made whole again!

                        __________________________________________________ ____________


                        It takes faith to see how this can be made whole again.

                        __________________________________________________ _________



                        You have to break a stubborn heart before you can know Jesus.

                        __________________________________________________ _______



                        Putting back together broken lives is His speciality.

                        __________________________________________________ _______



                        I break for Jesus!

                        __________________________________________________ _____
                        His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                        Guns For God and the Economy

                        Comment

                        • Roberta
                          Anti La Leche League Organizer
                          True Christian™
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 1817

                          #13
                          Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                          Don't wind up like Humpty-Dumpty!
                          Come climb my mountains.

                          Comment

                          • Pastor Ezekiel
                            Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                             
                            • Sep 2006
                            • 78555

                            #14
                            Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                            Originally posted by David Rothstein View Post
                            Jesus: 2000 Years And Still Waiting.
                            SHUT YOUR FILTHY KIKE MOUTH JOO!
                            Who Will Jesus Damn?

                            Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                            Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                            Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                            Comment

                            • handmaiden
                              Is a good, decent True Christian™ lady
                              True Christian™
                              • May 2010
                              • 11406

                              #15
                              Re: Easter Contest! Best Caption Wins an Easter Ham!

                              This is your brain on Jesus.
                              His left hand should be under my head, and his right hand should embrace me.

                              Guns For God and the Economy

                              Comment

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