Retard Kid Admits: Heaven is NOT a Holiday Resort

[Elmer G. White]

In 2010 a 6-year male child, too young to repent or be baptized, went into a coma for a couple of months. After this time he produced with his father a very popular false Christian Book called The Boy Who Came Back From Heaven by Alex and Kevin Malarkey. No, the name is not irony. It is their actual name.

malarkey

1. Nonsense; rubbish. I decided it was a bunch of malarkey and stopped reading about halfway through.

As said, I NEVER read any of it!


These are the emotional images we saw at the time in the lieberal atheist media.

This was suspicious to begin with. Children cannot be saved until they are old enough to feel repentance, fear God, receive baptism and eventually Redemption from Jesus. No 6-year-old can do that (Acts 2:38, Acts 3:19). While I was peripherally conscious of the existence of this demonic novel, I never read it, nor recommended it to anyone. The fluffy bunny false Christian community, however, embraced this in their desperate attempt to rationalize that "everybody would get into Heaven". They won't (Matthew 7:14).

Now, a small glimmer of hope can be seen. The boy actually repents! Glory! He has admitted that all the fiction about his being in Heaven were blatant lies.

Earlier this week, Alex recanted his testimony about the afterlife. In an open letter to Christian bookstores posted on the Pulpit and Pen Web site, Alex states flatly: “I did not die. I did not go to Heaven.”
Referring to the injuries that continue to make it difficult for him to express himself, Alex writes, “Please forgive the brevity, but because of my limitations I have to keep this short…. I said I went to heaven because I thought it would get me attention. When I made the claims that I did, I had never read the Bible. People have profited from lies, and continue to. They should read the Bible, which is enough. The Bible is the only source of truth. Anything written by man cannot be infallible.”

Verily, there is hope for this child, but his road to potential Salvation is a tortuous one. He has to really Repent and, in addition, give up his retarded lifestyle and choose to return to health and become a hard-working soldier of Christ. I am not saying it is impossible, just improbable.

Where did this made-up story that caused millions to skip repentance and choose the straight road to Hell originate from? I asked this question and was answered:

John 8:44
Ye are of your father the devil, and the lusts of your father ye will do. He was a murderer from the beginning, and abode not in the truth, because there is no truth in him. When he speaketh a lie, he speaketh of his own: for he is a liar, and the father of it.

Satan, of course. Demons that must have entered this family generations back when they chose their sorry excuse for a last name.

The coma lasted two months, and his injuries left him paralyzed, but the subsequent spiritual memoir — with its assuring description of “Miracles, Angels, and Life beyond This World” — became part of a popular genre of “heavenly tourism,” which has been controversial among orthodox Christians.

Heaven is not a place you just visit to have some light refreshing beverages and then depart. It is the dwelling-place of True Christians™ with Jesus. Again, Jesus has shown that the syrupy false Christians teachings will ultimately fail.



This is what the Real Heaven© looks like!


Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[John Creeser]

Re: Retard Kid Admits: Heaven is NOT a Holiday Resort

Amen Brother!!

The reason God smote him as cripple in the first is because God knew all long he was going to pull a stunt like this.

John 6:64 But there are some of you that believe not. For Jesus knew from the beginning who they were that believed not, and who should betray him.

Serves the little cripple well. Speaking of which, God hates cripples and he surely burn in the white hot flames of HELL!!!!

[Joanna Lytton-Vasey]

Re: Retard Kid Admits: Heaven is NOT a Holiday Resort

I had noticed that peculiar surname when the story came out, and wondered whether it was some illiterate version of Malachi. This seemed likely, as the child is called Kevin, an Irish name, and the potato-heads are not known for their ability to spell. (Well, they are not known for their ability to do anything much, but that's beside the point here.)

So out of curiosity I looked up the name and it is indeed from the O'Irish, O'Maoilearca. That "Mao" at the start is worryingly communist, isn't it? But allegedly it has something to do with Saint Earc, one of the many Fenian saints so insignificant or imaginary that he (or maybe she - who knows, who cares?) doesn't even feature in the list of 500 gazillion idolatrous catlick saints.

So, Brother Elmer, all this is just to say that the child must be a catlick and therefore there is no hope for him. Even if he appears to have repented, this is just the catlick "confession" ritual at work and his vegetable brain will make it impossible for him to truly find his way to Jesus.

If they gave all the money they have made from this evil book to a proper, Godly church like our own then I might change my mind.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Retard Kid Admits: Heaven is NOT a Holiday Resort

...So, Brother Elmer, all this is just to say that the child must be a catlick and therefore there is no hope for him. Even if he appears to have repented, this is just the catlick "confession" ritual at work and his vegetable brain will make it impossible for him to truly find his way to Jesus...

Very nice investigative work, Sister! The cat lick explanation must be the correct one. I did some more research and came up with THIS Interwebs site of the boy's begetter:

He and his wife, Beth, have four children (Alex, Aaron, Gracie, and Ryan) and attend a nondenominational evangelical church...

Why not reveal the Church where they go? Shame must be in the background preventing them from telling the truth. Further quotes reveal that cat lickism is the only possible option.

Mark 8:38
Whosoever therefore shall be ashamed of me and of my words in this adulterous and sinful generation; of him also shall the Son of man be ashamed, when he cometh in the glory of his Father with the holy angels.

...They enjoy spending time together playing board games...

I'm only asking but doesn't this ring 'sodomy' to you?

Leviticus 18:22
Thou shalt not lie with mankind, as with womankind: it is abomination.

...going to the zoo...

Bestiality? Still just asking.

Leviticus 20:15
And if a man lie with a beast, he shall surely be put to death: and ye shall slay the beast.

...finding new playgrounds, and exploring parks and recreational areas.

Now, while I'm still asking, isn't this exactly what cat licks do? Cruising parks and playgounds where altar boys swarm to find new playmates?

Matthew 18:6
But whoso shall offend one of these little ones which believe in me, it were better for him that a millstone were hanged about his neck, and that he were drowned in the depth of the sea.

What a sorry story, starting with lies the cat licks inevitably end up with experimenting with sodomy. And the cat lick community as well as other false Christians continue to commit spiritual self-abuse with this story:

...When Alex awoke from a coma two months later, he had an incredible story to share. Of events at the accident scene and in the hospital while he was unconscious. Of the angels who took him through the gates of Heaven itself. And, most amazing of all . . . of meeting and talking with Jesus.

The Boy Who Came Back from Heaven is the true story of an ordinary boy’s most extraordinary journey. As you see Heaven and earth through Alex’s eyes, you’ll come away with new insights on miracles, life beyond this world, and the power of a father’s love.

Now, instead of 'testimonials' we should look at the hard evidence. My quotes provide that. This was a cat lick hoax. What we have here is an unreliable witness that could have just invented all the incredible stuff in the hope of some prestige, power and financial profit. Testimonials are just glorified opinions of fallible men and they should be double-checked with actual Creation Science. It is ridiculous to just take some printed words at face value and believe them if they happen to coincide with your own preconceptions. Actual hard evidence comes from unbiased observations. At the opposite end of reliability we have Jesus and the Bible that is proven TRUE by reliable eye-witnesses and their certified authorship through the Holy Ghost. It saddens me, this gullibility of false believers...


Yours in Christ,

Elmer