[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: False Religions Register

I don't believe in anything past what is here today. I don't think there is a God or Satan--that's right I don't worship Satan or even acknowledge his/her existence. I would have previously called myself an atheist, but since they worship Satan, what do I need to call myself?--A realist?

Also, my churchy friends tell me that Jesus was a Jew, and from what I've heard, Jesus is supposed to be the opposite of Satan. So how does that fit with you list?

Jesus is NOT a damned joo!!

Read THIS, heathen.

[Stewie the Jewie]

Re: False Religions Register

Your a devil-worshiping heathen---and Jesus was so a Jew.

[Seawitch]

Re: False Religions Register

It is a well-known fact that atheists worship monkeys, which they beleive are their forebears. Anyone who worships animals are satan worshippers.

So you think Sacred Cows are four legged Satan's ......Bull***t!

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: False Religions Register

What do you people think of Jedi? And yes, there really are people who call themselves Jedi!

I've heard of 'em. Jedi Clampett innit?

[crying_blood]

Re: False Religions Register

just so you all know, all those religions named are real religions. None of them woship Satan. You just say they do because you are becoming arrogant and obnoxious as a Christian. Christianity may dominate as the religion, but you are all going to hell. Hate and discrimination and exclusion of people because they are different goes against the Bibles teachings.

Do you people even read the bible?

[John Bois Ward]

Re: False Religions Register

just so you all know, all those religions named are real religions. None of them woship Satan. You just say they do because you are becoming arrogant and obnoxious as a Christian. Christianity may dominate as the religion, but you are all going to hell. Hate and discrimination and exclusion of people because they are different goes against the Bibles teachings.

Do you people even read the bible?

Do you? Or perhaps you just ignore those passages you disagree with.

Matthew 10:34-35 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword. For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.

Mark 16:16 He that believeth and is baptized shall be saved; but he that believeth not shall be damned.

Luke 11:23 He that is not with me is against me: and he that gathereth not with me scattereth.

John 3:18 He that believeth on him is not condemned: but he that believeth not is condemned already, because he hath not believed in the name of the only begotten Son of God.

John 14:6 Jesus saith unto him, I am the way, the truth, and the life: no man cometh unto the Father, but by me.

Acts 4:12 Neither is there salvation in any other: for there is none other name under heaven given among men, whereby we must be saved.

Romans 16:17 Now I beseech you, brethren, mark them which cause divisions and offences contrary to the doctrine which ye have learned; and avoid them.

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: False Religions Register

just so you all know, all those religions named are real religions. None of them woship Satan. You just say they do because you are becoming arrogant and obnoxious as a Christian. Christianity may dominate as the religion, but you are all going to hell. Hate and discrimination and exclusion of people because they are different goes against the Bibles teachings.

Please do show us — book, chapter, and verse — which of the Bible's teachings we violate.

[Brother Lazarus]

Re: False Religions Register

Perhaps this religion/cult should be added to the list.

Parrot Heads
Submitted by: Brother Lazarus
Beliefs: The existance of a false "heaven" known as Margaritaville that can be reached by excessive partying and listening to the music of their deity, Jimmy Buffett.
Worship: Worship of Jimmy Buffett in the form of "tailgating" where adherents, prior to an appreance of their deity, engage in heavy drinking, over eating, nudity, and worship of various idols including parrots, lizards, pirates and sharks.

[Soldier for God]

Re: False Religions Register

What about the Anglicans and their divorcing, incestuous ways!

[searching2salvate]

Re: False Religions Register

This list does not include Erisians, who worship Eris and the Chao.

[Nobar King]

Re: False Religions Register

Perhaps this religion/cult should be added to the list.

Parrot Heads
Submitted by: Brother Lazarus
Beliefs: The existance of a false "heaven" known as Margaritaville that can be reached by excessive partying and listening to the music of their deity, Jimmy Buffett.
Worship: Worship of Jimmy Buffett in the form of "tailgating" where adherents, prior to an appreance of their deity, engage in heavy drinking, over eating, nudity, and worship of various idols including parrots, lizards, pirates and sharks.

I think that's considered a cult, since Buffett is still alive.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: False Religions Register

Perhaps this religion/cult should be added to the list.

Parrot Heads
Submitted by: Brother Lazarus
Beliefs: The existance of a false "heaven" known as Margaritaville that can be reached by excessive partying and listening to the music of their deity, Jimmy Buffett.
Worship: Worship of Jimmy Buffett in the form of "tailgating" where adherents, prior to an appreance of their deity, engage in heavy drinking, over eating, nudity, and worship of various idols including parrots, lizards, pirates and sharks.

With their love of Pirates (and the associated Parrots) they are clearly confused, but with some help I am sure they can discover the truth that they are clearly so close to finding.


RAmen

[Mad Prophet Helmholtz]

Re: False Religions Register

With their love of Pirates (and the associated Parrots) they are clearly confused, but with some help I am sure they can discover the truth that they are clearly so close to finding.


RAmen

You, a devout FSM worshipper, have a Pirate as your avatar? WHAT? I don't get it...that's like having a True Christian(tm) here with Mephistopheles for an avatar, or me with Ghost Shark performing oral on Richard Simmons.

[Jo Freddie]

Re: False Religions Register

You, a devout FSM worshipper, have a Pirate as your avatar? WHAT? I don't get it...that's like having a True Christian™ here with Mephistopheles for an avatar, or me with Ghost Shark performing oral on Richard Simmons.

As a devote Pastafarian I use the image of a Pirate, and dress in Pirate regalia as an act of worship. Pirates are God's chosen people.

[Mad Prophet Helmholtz]

Re: False Religions Register

As a devote Pastafarian I use the image of a Pirate, and dress in Pirate regalia as an act of worship. Pirates are God's chosen people.

How do you feel about the eternal strife between Ninjas and Pirates? I believe it's a false conflict, since both serve the interests of the Satanic Alliance. PIRATES ARE UNITED BEHIND A COMMON CAUSE TO STOP THE CRUISE SHIP INDUSTRY and I've had many Ninja assassins attempt to kill me over the years.