Do you hail Satan??

[apocalypse666]

I know I do.
Do you, like me, prefer slaughtering priests rather than listening to their babble?
Do you, like me, enjoy the seduction of the innocent, ending with forced sodomy and ritual sacrifice?
Do you, like me, prowl unsuspecting towns for victims to twist and mutilate?
Do you, like me, take great pleasure in using sex and temptation to enslave the aforementioned victims to do your bidding?
Do you, like me, feel a need to burn and desecrate all images and symbols of Christ?
If so, then you, my friend, are a true Satanist.
Congratulations!!!

[Original Gothster]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

I know I do.

No you don't. You're some pimple faced dork living in your Mom's basement. And I bet you're fat too.

Do you, like me, prefer slaughtering priests rather than listening to their babble?

Shows what you know. Priests are Catholic. This is a Baptist forum. We have Pastors dumbass.

Do you, like me, enjoy the seduction of the innocent, ending with forced sodomy and ritual sacrifice?

You're a virgin, unless you count being violated by your uncle. Listen pipsqueak, I've done more guys than you can shake a stick at. The bigger they talk they less they've done. And you talk mighty big little man.

Do you, like me, prowl unsuspecting towns for victims to twist and mutilate?

You couldn't hurt a fly. I bet a chick in her forties, me for instance, could break you in half without getting winded.

Do you, like me, take great pleasure in using sex and temptation to enslave the aforementioned victims to do your bidding?

Again, you wouldn't know the first thing to do with a woman, I can smell it off ya!

Do you, like me, feel a need to burn and desecrate all images and symbols of Christ?

You're such a liar!

If so, then you, my friend, are a true Satanist.
Congratulations!!!

I've known some Satanists in my time, and you ain't one, I'll garun-damn-tee it! They don't take kindly to little needle dicks like you pretending to be one of 'em.

Look dude, I'm kicking junk and getting right with the Lord. You might wanna think about doing the same.

[Johnnyboy]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

Didn't stick around long, did you? Idiot.

[Talitha]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

Didn't stick around long, did you? Idiot.

His Mom called and apologized for his stupidity
She said it was way past bedtime and he needed his meds.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

blah, blah look I am a sodomite blah

If so, then you, my friend, are a true Satanist.
Congratulations!!!

Know what I love about Satanists; you can sternly rebuke and even the secularists don't care.

When I was doing my missionary work in San Francisco me and one of my Christian brothers were showing this one Satanist some tough love. So there is this Satanist tied up in the bottom of a pit in the Santa Cruz mountains while we were tossing shovels full of dirt on him.

"You can't due this" the Satanist says "You are Christians, you are suppose to love me, you mealy mouthed f*gg*ts."

"Why not friend?" I say as I tossed another shovel full of dirt on him "We do love you but the Bible is clear what do with you kind. Now repent before it is too late."

"Repent! (censored) no you mother (censored)! Hail Satan! Hail Satan,..!" He shrieks, until another shovel full caught him in the face.

You should of seen his eyes when we packed the dirt over his mouth and nose. I guess he never thought we would go threw will it. Oh I wish I could have taken a picture.

Fun times.

(and my lawyer tells me the above is a joke)

[666Ravage]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

[WWJDnow]

Re: Do you hail Satan??

Do you, like me, prefer slaughtering priests rather than listening to their babble?

Catholic priests do babble, and they commit several acts on a regular basis for which death is mandated by the Bible:

Thou shalt not suffer a witch to live. Exodus 22:18 (saying spells over cookies and wine)

But the prophet, which shall presume to speak a word in my name, which I have not commanded him to speak, or that shall speak in the name of other gods, even that prophet shall die. Deuteronomy 18:20 (leading others away from the faith and into idolatry)

If there be found among you, within any of thy gates which the LORD thy God giveth thee, man or woman, that hath wrought wickedness in the sight of the LORD thy God, in transgressing his covenant, And hath gone and served other gods, and worshipped them, either the sun, or moon, or any of the host of heaven, which I have not commanded.... Then shalt thou bring forth that man or that woman, which have committed that wicked thing, unto thy gates, even that man or that woman, and shalt stone them with stones, till they die. Deuteronomy 17:2-5 (worshiping idols and praying to dead people)

If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them. Leviticus 20:13 (pretty much every priest is a homo)