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I want to warn our members about a cesspool of homosexuality, witchcraft, vampirism, and overall drivel of the Devil called Dante's Cove. My husband Elmer brought this DVD home thinking it was about bass fishing, but before we could hit the ejact or eject button on the DVD player, the leading character had performed oral sex three times! I was so disturbed that I took the DVD player out and burned it in our incinerator. I am especially worried that our ungay members might accidentally view this smut.
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Jesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief. -
Re: Dante's Cove - A WARNING!
Well ma'am, if you're worried about them us seeing it, then why do you give us a link to it? Or even bring it up for that matter?Originally posted by Glendora Christianson View Post -
Re: Dante's Cove - A WARNING!
I feel the producers of the disgusting and sick entertainment (I use the term loosely) intentionally made the package look similar to an actual bass fishing DVD, so a warning is needed to protect those who's salivations are less secure (this includes you). HELPFUL AND ONLY SOMEWHAT ANNOYED GLEONDORAOriginally posted by Joo View PostJesus - gentle, dependable overnight relief.Comment
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Re: Dante's Cove - A WARNING!
you know Mother G, that show reminds me of an old TV show called "Dark Shadows" that my father, Pastor Ezekiel Sr., spent hundreds of pulpit hours screaming about. It seems that the show was chock full of homers, vampires and homer vampires.
Don't bring it up around him if you happen to run into him. It isn't good for his blood pressure, all that screaming....
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!Comment
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Re: Dante's Cove - A WARNING!
Oh, so that explains the homer vampire theme Ezekiel Sr. always uses in his Halloween hell house. I knew I was missing something because when I once complemented him on the nice allegory for homerism he smacked me across the head and screamed “Allegory? There is nothing freaking allegorical about homer vampires you knuckle dragging idiot!” and then gave this lecture about how homer vampires suck out guys blood out his daddy bits.Originally posted by Pastor Ezekiel View Post
I had do buy him a new cane too as an apology after he broke his old one on me.
Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.
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