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  • MitzaLizalor
    Completely CRAZY for the Lord
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2010
    • 14225

    #16
    Re: Pseudo-baptists

    Originally posted by Lost Sheep McUinnean View Post
    I used to live in a house in a forest too. I never saw anything like that though. Mind you, we did here a lot of owls too-whit-too-whooing all the time. Then again the lights were out so you could never see anything. Maybe they were too-whit too-wooing instead all the time.
    Perhaps the forests are different here, the people all in bondage to satan!

    Deuteronomy 15:17 Then thou shalt take an aule, and thrust it through his eare vnto the doore, and hee shall be thy seruant for euer: and also vnto thy mayd seruant thou shalt doe likewise.
    ©1611

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    • Lost Sheep McUinnean
      Linguistics and Translation Consultant
      True Christian™
      • Nov 2009
      • 2193

      #17
      Re: Pseudo-baptists

      Originally posted by MitzaLizalor View Post
      Perhaps the forests are different here, the people all in bondage to satan!

      Deuteronomy 15:17 Then thou shalt take an aule, and thrust it through his eare vnto the doore, and hee shall be thy seruant for euer: and also vnto thy mayd seruant thou shalt doe likewise.
      ©1611

      Not to mention what the koalas are bound to get up to at night.

      (*shudders)

      Comment

      • MitzaLizalor
        Completely CRAZY for the Lord
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2010
        • 14225

        #18
        Re: Pseudo-baptists

        Originally posted by Lost Sheep McUinnean View Post
        Not to mention what the koalas are bound to get up to at night.

        (*shudders)
        Koalas are rather strong animals and have claws. They can become quite tame but are suffering from a loathsome disease, as are Tasmanian devils (a different loathsome disease). Probably caught from convicts. Satan on the other hand can pull you into Hell. False churches prove his existence, such as so ably demonstrated by Mr Freddie - I think we are starting to get somewhere with him, Mr McUinnean
        But then he had to start overcompensating by obsessing on mens bottoms.

        Where Satan is active, we can look forward to a greater Work from God.

        Hebrews 4
        12
        For the word of God is quicke and powerfull, and sharper then any two edged sword, pearcing euen to the diuiding asunder of soule and spirit, and of the ioynts and marrowe, and is a discerner of the thoughts and intents of the heart.
        13 Neither is there any creature that is not manifest in his sight: but all things are naked, and opened vnto the eyes of him with whome wee haue to doe.

        ©1611

        God can see what Mr Freddie is thinking, just like He knows why all those dreadful people are hanging around in forests at night.

        II PETER 2:4 The Lord knoweth how to deliuer the godly out of temptations, and to reserue the vniust vnto the day of iudgement to be punished:

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        • Jo Freddie
          Unsaved trash
          Hateful God mocking pirate
          • Apr 2009
          • 6339

          #19
          Re: Pseudo-baptists

          Originally posted by Billy Bob Jenkins View Post
          Loving Jesus is the least gay thing there is, right up there with war and Republican politics. I resent the implication that I am homosexually attracted to my saviour!
          You need to stop over compensating BB. I never said you were sexually attracted to jesus, your perception that I may have suggested such a thing may well be due to those same facets of your subconscious that you are struggling so hard to suppress.

          The paranoia that you constantly exhibit is a well documented symptom of your underlining problem. But if you accept who you are and embrace what you are then those symptoms will disappear and your feelings will cease to be a problem for you.
          Posted via Pasta

          True Pastafarian™

          May my Sauce be with you!
          Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
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          The Loose Canon - HTML version
          Loose Canon Fan Page
          North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
          I have been to The Volcano!

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          • MitzaLizalor
            Completely CRAZY for the Lord
            True Christian™
            • Sep 2010
            • 14225

            #20
            Re: Pseudo-baptists

            You know I don't go around looking for Pseudo-baptists any more than I go trawling for perverts, but in a recent thread on the introduction forum I was alerted to a veritable cult in this post.

            Now when I read things I actually check them out before commenting further. That "church" posts its mission statement (or whatever they call it).
            I read all of it . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . . .

            Take this in:

            I nearly vomited
            He [God] is fatherly in His attitude toward all men.


            What about Jericho?

            JOSHUA 6 2, 20-21
            2
            And the Lord said vnto Ioshua, See, I haue giuen into thine hand Iericho, and the King thereof, and the mighty men of valour
            ...
            20 So the people shouted when the Priests blew with the trumpets: and it came to passe when the people heard the sound of the trumpet, and the people shouted with a great shout, that the wall fell downe flat, so that the people went vp into the citie, euery man straight before him, and they tooke the citie.
            21 And they vtterly destroyed all that was in the city, both man and woman, yong and old, and oxe, and sheepe, and asse, with the edge of the sword.

            ©1611

            What about nearby Ai?

            JOSHUA 8 1, 5-8, 12, 15, 19, 25-26
            1
            And the Lord said vnto Ioshua, Feare not, neither be thou dismaid: take all the people of warre with thee, and arise, goe vp to Ai: See, I haue giuen into thy hand the king of Ai, and his people, and his citie, and his land
            ...
            5 And I, and all the people that are with mee, will approch vnto the citie: and it shall come to passe when they come out against vs, as at the first, that we will flee before them,
            6 (For they will come out after vs) till we haue drawen them from the citie; for they will say, They flee before vs, as at the first: therefore we will flee before them.
            7 Then yee shall rise vp from the ambush, and seise vpon the citie: for the Lord your God will deliuer it into your hand.
            8 And it shall be when yee haue taken the citie, that ye shall set the citie on fire: according to the commandement of the Lord shall ye do. See, I haue commanded you
            ...
            12 And he tooke about fiue thousand men, and set them to lye in ambush betweene Bethel and Ai, on the West side of the citie
            ...
            15 And Ioshua and all Israel made as if they were beaten before them, and fled by the way of the wildernesse
            ...
            19 And the ambush arose quickly out of their place, and they ranne as soone as he had stretched out his hand: and they entred into the city, and tooke it, and hasted, and set the citie on fire
            ...
            25 And so it was that all that fell that day, both of men and women, were twelue thousand, euen all the men of Ai.
            26 For Ioshua drew not his hand backe wherewith hee stretched out the speare, vntill he had vtterly destroyed all the inhabitants of Ai.

            ©1611

            Then I understood that this outfit might only be pretending to teach The Bible. I became suspicious a bit further down when, hidden in amongst a lot of other words, I read:

            [COLOR="DarkSlateGray"]
            By his free choice man sinned against God and brought sin into the human race. Through the temptation of Satan man transgressed the command of God, and fell from his original innocence whereby his posterity cf GENESIS 3:15 inherit a nature and an environment inclined toward sin.


            The threads here at Landover Baptist are very helpful in understanding God's word, and so I was immediately reminded of this passage:

            I TIMOTHY 2
            13
            For Adam was first formed, then Eue:
            14 And Adam was not deceiued, but the woman being deceiued was in the transgression:
            15 Notwithstanding she shall be saued in child-bearing, if they continue in faith and charitie, and holinesse, with sobrietie.

            ©1611

            Now I know that all humans - women and men - are foul sinners, unless they accept the Salvation offered by God through His Son's Awful Death (and in the case of woman through childbearing [verse 15 (above)]).

            But The Bible seems to differentiate the female perspective from the male. I read The Bible to see. This is what I found:


            IN GENESIS
            GENESIS 3
            12
            And the man said, The woman whom thou gauest to be with mee, shee gaue me of the tree, and I did eate.
            13 And the LORD God said vnto the woman, What is this that thou hast done? And the woman said, The Serpent beguiled me, and I did eate.


            Three participants in disaster, three punishments:

            THE SERPENT
            14 And the LORD God said vnto the Serpent, Because thou hast done this, thou art cursed aboue all cattel, and aboue euery beast of the field: vpon thy belly shalt thou goe, and dust shalt thou eate, all the dayes of thy life.
            15 And I will put enmitie betweene thee and the woman, and betweene thy seed and her seed: it shal bruise thy head, and thou shalt bruise his heele.


            THE WOMAN
            16 Unto the woman he said, I will greatly multiply thy sorowe and thy conception. In sorow thou shalt bring forth children: and thy desire shall be to thy husband, and hee shall rule ouer thee.

            ADAM
            17 And vnto Adam he said, Because thou hast hearkened vnto the voyce of thy wife, and hast eaten of the tree, of which I commaunded thee, saying, Thou shalt not eate of it: cursed is the ground for thy sake: in sorow shalt thou eate of it all the dayes of thy life.
            ©1611

            The distinction between Adam and the woman is quite clear. God is always clear in what He teaches us. God is consistent. That is why The Bible is consistent. I read on:


            IN JOB
            JOB 14
            1
            Man that is borne of a woman, is of few dayes, and full of trouble.
            2 Hee commeth forth like a flower, and is cut downe: he fleeth also, as a shaddow and continueth not.
            3 And doest thou open thine eies vpon such an one, and bringest me into iudgment with thee?
            4 Who can bring a cleane thing out of an vncleane? not one.

            ©1611

            There can be no doubt that the foul nature of humanity is due to the unclean status of the woman - we are all contaminated. Men as well as women. Notice that in GENESIS 3:15 it is the seed of the woman that will get his heel bruised..

            God likes to be quite clear. Just in case some leftie Pseudo-baptist doesn't "get it" God spells it out again:

            JOB 25:4 How then can man bee iustified with God? or how can he be cleane that is borne of a woman?
            ©1611
            __________________________________________________

            I continued to glance over that mission statement, whatever, and reached this section, down near the end somewhere. They would be hoping that any reader might have gotten bamboozled or gone soft in the head by this time. I had done neither:

            Even so I nearly fell off my chair
            The husband and wife are of equal worth before God, since both are created in God's image. The marriage relationship models the way God relates to His people. A husband is to love his wife as Christ loved the church. He has the God-given responsibility to provide for, to protect, and to lead his family. A wife is to submit herself graciously to the servant leadership of her husband even as the church willingly submits to the headship of Christ. She, being in the image of God as is her husband and thus equal to him,


            I've heard it said that "the devil is in the detail" — well there is detail aplenty in that document & it doesn't take much imagination to see his influence, slimy and wretched, pulling down to Hell. God lifts us up to Heaven.

            PRAISE HIM!

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