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  • Cecil_Widowmaker
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
    • Apr 2008
    • 38

    #1

    I LAUGH!!

    So I talked to Goddess today. She wanted me to tell you all this. See, people like us (sensitives, Grey, 'kin, witches, etc) are the chosen ones. We are the ones who are destined to changed the fate of the world (tell me something I don't know!) and that we have to use our powers of reason and intuition to help shape the earth. Problem is, there are lots of STUPID people on the planet. She's a pretty awesome Goddess, so she knew she would have to give us a bit of a mental workout to get us into shape.

    So here's what She did. About 2000 years ago, She came up with a phony religion. She used Her almighty shapeshifting abilities (cause you know deity are polymorphs) and turned into a God for a bit, made sent this Jesus guy, under the guise that it would snowball into the world's largest fundamental religion. This false religion would parade itself as 'the one true religion,' 'salvation,' 'the word of the Lord,' and many other absolute statements. She knew that they would say they are the only way to Heaven, that they would try their hardest to convince the True Believers they are on the wrong path and try to make them stray from their universal duty. They would have a figurehead, a mascot of evil, Satan, whom which they would try to convince the Chosen that all of their ways are wrong, to tempt them, to see if their faith to the True Goddess was real. They would threaten the Chosen with an eternity of agony (even in Her greatest scorn, She's never been pissed enough to put us away for ETERNITY! gosh...) and all sorts of other nasty stuff for our 'erroneous ways.'

    I invite any of you seeds of temptation to prove me wrong, for I know the one true path, and Jesus was created solely as a construct to test my faith.

    Good luck XD
  • Bobby-Joe
    Landover Security Superviser
    Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
    NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 18405

    #2
    Re: I LAUGH!!

    Your’ logic is faulty, how could you goddess impregnate Mary? Women don’t generate life.

    Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

    Hot Must ReadThreads!


    Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

    Comment

    • Cecil_Widowmaker
      Confirmed Enemy of God
      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
      • Apr 2008
      • 38

      #3
      Re: I LAUGH!!

      SHE IS A GODDESS! thats how... and technically, it requires both a man and a woman to generate life, right?

      Comment

      • Cecil_Widowmaker
        Confirmed Enemy of God
        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
        • Apr 2008
        • 38

        #4
        Re: I LAUGH!!

        and... if you read the whole thing you would realize that she turned male for a while

        Comment

        • Mad European
          Confirmed Enemy of God
          BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
          • Apr 2008
          • 63

          #5
          Re: I LAUGH!!

          Why do you purposefully try and aggrevate people on this forum? Saying this will obviously upset people, just seems a bit pointless coming on the forums if all you are going to do is upset people and get yourself banned.

          Comment

          • Cecil_Widowmaker
            Confirmed Enemy of God
            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
            • Apr 2008
            • 38

            #6
            Re: I LAUGH!!

            i do not wish to anger people... situations are 1% what happens and 99% how you react...so if they get angry, its not my fault... but i wish to make a point

            Comment

            • Deaner
              Christ's Love Messenger
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 5932

              #7
              Re: I LAUGH!!

              Originally posted by Cecil_Widowmaker View Post
              and... if you read the whole thing you would realize that she turned male for a while
              Oh, I see...she's a goddess that turned herself male so she could impregnate Mary and create the false religion of Christianity. Then she turned herself back into a female again and started telling the Christians how wrong they are when she created them in the first place. What kind of sick freak do you worship?

              Comment

              • Grace
                True Christian™
                True Christian™
                • Dec 2007
                • 12

                #8
                Re: I LAUGH!!

                Originally posted by Cecil_Widowmaker View Post
                i do not wish to anger people... situations are 1% what happens and 99% how you react...so if they get angry, its not my fault... but i wish to make a point
                mister windowmaker, you make me angry cause you make fun of baby Jesus and make him cry.
                If you make me cry my mama gonna kick your Butt.

                Comment

                • Cecil_Widowmaker
                  Confirmed Enemy of God
                  BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                  • Apr 2008
                  • 38

                  #9
                  Re: I LAUGH!!

                  Originally posted by Little Miss Talitha View Post
                  mister windowmaker, you make me angry cause you make fun of baby Jesus and make him cry.
                  If you make me cry my mama gonna kick your Butt.
                  MY SIRNAME IS WIDOWMAKER! and last time i checked, Jesus was a 35 (or so) year old man and no longer an infant, i would love to see your mother try to harm me as well, it would get rid of the boredom

                  Comment

                  • Cecil_Widowmaker
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                    • Apr 2008
                    • 38

                    #10
                    Re: I LAUGH!!

                    Originally posted by Deaner View Post
                    Oh, I see...she's a goddess that turned herself male so she could impregnate Mary and create the false religion of Christianity. Then she turned herself back into a female again and started telling the Christians how wrong they are when she created them in the first place. What kind of sick freak do you worship?
                    i do not worship a sick freak, if anyone worships a sick freak, its you guys, how wrathful your God is, should people not worship a loving character? why is it your God threatens and condemns nearly everything you do? the only thing we condemn is discrimination, drugs, and alcohol.

                    Comment

                    • Mad European
                      Confirmed Enemy of God
                      BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                      • Apr 2008
                      • 63

                      #11
                      Re: I LAUGH!!

                      I don't see why your goddess would make a fake religion, did she make the other major religions of the world? If thats the case then she really is incredibly stupid, what sort of god would make religions up, could she not see that religions would end up at each other's throats? If this is the case she is responsible for the deaths of everybody from 911, the crusades, war in Afghanistan, the list can go on, and the deaths she is responsible for are unthinkable. That's one great goddess you got there.

                      Comment

                      • Deaner
                        Christ's Love Messenger
                        True Christian™
                        • Sep 2006
                        • 5932

                        #12
                        Re: I LAUGH!!

                        Originally posted by Cecil_Widowmaker View Post
                        why is it your God threatens and condemns nearly everything you do? the only thing we condemn is discrimination, drugs, and alcohol.
                        Why does your goddess create things that you can feel superior too? What are we Christians? Do you think we like being some goddesses sick plaything???

                        Comment

                        • Cecil_Widowmaker
                          Confirmed Enemy of God
                          BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                          • Apr 2008
                          • 38

                          #13
                          Re: I LAUGH!!

                          the wars may are not her fault... she may have created them but it is mankinds fault that they have killed eachother over them, the problem is people fighting in the name of their god(s) and/or goddess(es) and it suddenly becomes right to kill those whose beliefs conflict theirs... foolish if you ask me

                          Comment

                          • Cecil_Widowmaker
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                            • Apr 2008
                            • 38

                            #14
                            Re: I LAUGH!!

                            i enjoy the fact that i answer your questions and yet you answer mine with more questions... why is this?

                            Comment

                            • Deaner
                              Christ's Love Messenger
                              True Christian™
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 5932

                              #15
                              Re: I LAUGH!!

                              Originally posted by Cecil_Widowmaker View Post
                              i enjoy the fact that i answer your questions and yet you answer mine with more questions... why is this?
                              Why is what?

                              Comment

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