Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

[Brother J.H.]

I don't know if this is the right forum, but I wanted some Christian advise (Not Cathylicks or Mooselimbs).

Well, I was reading some recent statistics on how many people have heard the word of God.
I want to help the savage beasts of Africa and the Middle East hear the word of God. I asked God if he could help me and he inspired me with this idea. Please tell me if this was actually God telling me this idea and if its a good idea.

I want to rent a Hummer SUV and drive it across all of the middle east and africa. I will play a recording out of the back of my Hummer that will say "Accept Jesus Christ or Go to Hell". This is my way of making sure EVERYONE in Africa and the Middle East has heard the word of God. I will also have planes fly overhead and drop out tithing envelopes made out of Landover Baptist. The envelopes will give descriptions as to how much money gets you saved etc etc.

What do you think?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

I don't know if this is the right forum, but I wanted some Christian advise (Not Cathylicks or Mooselimbs).

Well, I was reading some recent statistics on how many people have heard the word of God.
I want to help the savage beasts of Africa and the Middle East hear the word of God. I asked God if he could help me and he inspired me with this idea. Please tell me if this was actually God telling me this idea and if its a good idea.

I want to rent a Hummer SUV and drive it across all of the middle east and africa. I will play a recording out of the back of my Hummer that will say "Accept Jesus Christ or Go to Hell". This is my way of making sure EVERYONE in Africa and the Middle East has heard the word of God. I will also have planes fly overhead and drop out tithing envelopes made out of Landover Baptist. The envelopes will give descriptions as to how much money gets you saved etc etc.

What do you think?

I think you're a kook.

What kind of a nut would rent a Hummer?

[Jacques Anape]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

I don't know if this is the right forum, but I wanted some Christian advise (Not Cathylicks or Mooselimbs).

Well, I was reading some recent statistics on how many people have heard the word of God.
I want to help the savage beasts of Africa and the Middle East hear the word of God. I asked God if he could help me and he inspired me with this idea. Please tell me if this was actually God telling me this idea and if its a good idea.

I want to rent a Hummer SUV and drive it across all of the middle east and africa. I will play a recording out of the back of my Hummer that will say "Accept Jesus Christ or Go to Hell". This is my way of making sure EVERYONE in Africa and the Middle East has heard the word of God. I will also have planes fly overhead and drop out tithing envelopes made out of Landover Baptist. The envelopes will give descriptions as to how much money gets you saved etc etc.

What do you think?

Hi Sister,
I'm new around here, so I can't give you the 'official' line of Landover, but if you really want to bring these people to Christ, perhaps a good start would be to avoid describing them as 'savage beasts'?

Don't forget, Jesus Himself was born in the Middle East, and having been a missionary in Africa for three years, I can tell you that it is the most beautiful country with the most wonderful welcoming people.

As for tithing, it cannot buy you a place in Heaven. Don't you know we are saved by grace alone? (Col 2:14)

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Well, I was reading some recent statistics on how many people have heard the word of God.
I want to help the savage beasts of Africa and the Middle East hear the word of God. I asked God if he could help me and he inspired me with this idea. Please tell me if this was actually God telling me this idea and if its a good idea.

Have you encountered the brick testament? I find it does an excellent job of putting across God's Message in terms that our, ahem, more simple-minded brethren can understand.

As for tithing, it cannot buy you a place in Heaven. Don't you know we are saved by grace alone? (Col 2:14)

And do you not agree that faith without works is dead (James 2:14-26) and that we will be judged according to our works (Revelation 20:13, 22:12)?

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Hi Sister,
I'm new around here, so I can't give you the 'official' line of Landover, but if you really want to bring these people to Christ, perhaps a good start would be to avoid describing them as 'savage beasts'?

Don't forget, Jesus Himself was born in the Middle East, and having been a missionary in Africa for three years, I can tell you that it is the most beautiful country with the most wonderful welcoming people.

As for tithing, it cannot buy you a place in Heaven. Don't you know we are saved by grace alone? (Col 2:14)

You retard - Jesus was fair skinned with blond hair and blue eyes. You need to cease & desist in this blasphemy of yours. It is apparent that you hate baby Jesus, just leave it at that.

As far as these savage nigras being welcoming, have you ever seen a shrunken head, you know those belonged to decent white folk at one time don't you? You should do your research before trying to mislead people, fortunately I am not falling for your tomfoolery...

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Hi Sister,
I'm new around here, so I can't give you the 'official' line of Landover, but if you really want to bring these people to Christ, perhaps a good start would be to avoid describing them as 'savage beasts'?

Don't forget, Jesus Himself was born in the Middle East, and having been a missionary in Africa for three years, I can tell you that it is the most beautiful country with the most wonderful welcoming people.

As for tithing, it cannot buy you a place in Heaven. Don't you know we are saved by grace alone? (Col 2:14)

Hi, hippie!

What exactly would you call people who run about naked and eat termites? They're uncivilized. They have not been touched by the Glory of Jesus. I'd call them savage beasts. Not politically correct, perhaps, but accurate.

Jesus was indeed born in the Middle East. However, that does not make Him an Arab; that's simply where God chose to be born. He is God, remember, not "some great teacher".

As for the wonderful welcoming people . . . those who are not Saved(c) will be welcomed to Hell, no matter how nice they are on Earth. I hope you helped them understand this, instead of feeding them Feelgood Hippie Lurve.

[Jacques Anape]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Dear Don the Baptist and Rev Rodimer,

Can I ask whether you are in the habit of addressing your brothers and sisters in Christ as 'hippie' and 'retard'? What sort of example is that to set? Is that would Jesus would do? I suggest that if you speak gently, meekly and with love in your words you will find a lot more folks will be receptive to your message. You will save a lot more souls that way than by shouting at people and telling them they are going to Hell.

Rev Rodimer, have you ever been to Africa? During my time there, I did not see anyone running around naked and eating termites. They had few clothes and little food, but they made do with what God give them. It is deeply insulting that you refer to any one of his precious creations as 'savage beasts'. In fact, I'd go as far to say that it's sinful. Perhaps you should reflect whether those words really were appropriate. Or is it just the fact Africans have a different color of skin that you cannot fathom?

As for Don the Baptist's suggestion that Jesus was "fair skinned with blond hair and blue eyes", that's the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. On what authority do you base that comment? Jesus was the son of a Jewish mother and a Jewish father, with long ancestoral lines in the Middle East. How many folks from that part of the world have blond hair and blue eyes? In all likelihood, Jesus had dark olive skin and brown eyes. And what does it matter anyway?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

As for Don the Baptist's suggestion that Jesus was "fair skinned with blond hair and blue eyes", that's the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. On what authority do you base that comment? Jesus was the son of a Jewish mother and a Jewish father, with long ancestoral lines in the Middle East. How many folks from that part of the world have blond hair and blue eyes? In all likelihood, Jesus had dark olive skin and brown eyes. And what does it matter anyway?

Jacques,

Jesus father is God, as a Christians we have to belive that as a mater of the faith. That makes Jesus race "God", not Jewish, I mean the mother doesn't count as far as inheritance goes. Therefor it is logical Jesus is fair skinned and blond haired.

[Jacques Anape]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

"Therefor it is logical Jesus is fair skinned and blond haired."

What???? How ON EARTH is that logical???

[Nobar King]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Hey, Jockes, not everyone is a pantywaist like you.

[ExGay Alex]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Well, all the pictures I have ever seen of him show him, at the very least, to be blue eyed. Christ was not a jew, and Pastor Ezekiel has done excellent research proving that he is not one. See the picture below. This is truly Christ. Does he look Jewish? I mean, seriously, look at his nose and how non-kinky his hair is! How much proof do you need?

As for Africans, these poor colored folks run around foodless and spreading their AIDS because they have not prayed to God in Jesus's name. This is because they do not heard the Word of the Lord, and God, naturally, ignores them. I think it is honorable of our original poster to want to go to these darker, well, not "inferior," but less developed races (well, sometimes inferior) and to save their souls. By Grace are ye saved through faith. No faith, no salvation. Bless you Sister Phelps. Glory to God.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

I have never seen such a perfect example of the blaspheming false Christian as Mr. Jacques Happy. I hope he and his liberal cafeteria Christians enjoy their eternity in hellfire!

First, Jesus is most certainly blond haired and blue eyed, and with a smooth, fair White complexion like Brad Pitt circa 1998.

Second, using logic is for liberals, heathens, and false Christians. I'll let you decide which group you fall into!

And finally, the real Bible (KJV 1611) says that the Nigras of Africa are heathens, and not worthy of saving. There is some debate about whether the Nigras even have souls. Perhaps there is a separate (but equal) Nigra Heaven, where the Nigras eat watermelon and fried chicken all day by their Nigra Jesus. You know, sort of like a pet heaven for the Coloreds.

It just boggles my mind how a seemingly intelligent person can't figure out that the Coloreds are fundamentally inferior. It's obvious by the fact that they simply can't read or swim no matter how hard you try to teach them, they're afraid of ghosts, they can't speak proper English, and they will always avoid hard work. If that isn't definitive proof, then you're just too hard-headed to acknowledge reality, Mr. Jacques Happy.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Dear Don the Baptist and Rev Rodimer,

Can I ask whether you are in the habit of addressing your brothers and sisters in Christ as 'hippie' and 'retard'? What sort of example is that to set?

I am in the habit of addressing hippies as hippies. I am in the habit of addressing False Feelgood Christians as False Feelgood Christians.

You, Hippie Jacques, are presenting a false Hippie Lurve God. Therefore, you are clearly a hippie AND a False Feelgood Christian, and I will call you such.

I cannot speak for Don; he does have a propensity to assume that anyone who cannot be bothered to read God's Word but then spouts off about what Jesus wants must be intellectually lacking. It's not always the best way to engage people in a meaningful conversation, but you must admit he is passionate about the Lord!

Is that would Jesus would do? I suggest that if you speak gently, meekly and with love in your words you will find a lot more folks will be receptive to your message. You will save a lot more souls that way than by shouting at people and telling them they are going to Hell.

Yes, if we lie to people about Jesus, and tell them that He loves everyone and that we all get a Golden Ticket to Heaven when we die, I'm sure more people would line up to become False Christians like you. However, we would be LYING to them, and condemning them to Hell through that action. They'd be worshipping a false god we made, a form of idolatry! You know what God thinks of idolators (like Catholics), don't you?

Tell me, Hippie Jacques, have you ever READ the Bible? Where do you get the idea that God loves everybody? He states clearly that He HATES those who do not follow all of His Laws!

Psalm 5

3 My voice shalt thou hear in the morning, O LORD; in the morning will I direct my prayer unto thee, and will look up.

4 For thou art not a God that hath pleasure in wickedness: neither shall evil dwell with thee.

5 The foolish shall not stand in thy sight: thou hatest all workers of iniquity.

6 Thou shalt destroy them that speak leasing: the LORD will abhor the bloody and deceitful man.

Hates all workers of iniquity. Abhor. Does that sound like LUUUURVE to you?

Psalm 11:5
The LORD trieth the righteous: but the wicked and him that loveth violence his soul hateth.

I could give you more examples, but it really would be easier for you to actually READ the Bible.

Luckily for you, the good folks at Landover Baptist Church have put together a handy Bible in a Year section, where you can read along with Brother V and discuss the Bible!

Rev Rodimer, have you ever been to Africa? During my time there, I did not see anyone running around naked and eating termites.

I've never had the misfortune. However, it sounds like you never left a few major, Westernized cities. For your sake, I do hope you didn't catch the AIDS; one in 6 adults over there has it, you know, and they're not shy about sharing.

Since you clearly won't take MY word as a Christian (you've already questioned it repeatedly), here's a nice hippie reference for you:

http://www.biodiversityexplorer.org/...tera/isoptera/

People eat termites


"Termites are considered a delicacy in most parts of Africa. The queen is considered to be an exquisite dish and is often fed to children (Uganda and Zambia). The soldiers and the reproductive form are also eaten. Termites are fried in their own fat or steamed in banana leaves (Uganda). Fried or dried, they contain 32-36% protein... The most popular are the sexual winged forms of the large species (Macrotermitinae) which emerge from holes in their mounds after the first rains, often at night. They are collected in various ways. In urban areas, they are attracted to electric light and are trapped in receptacles of water placed under or near the light source. In rural areas, they are caught when emerging from the termite mounds. Attracted by the light of a grass torch, the termites are swept up with a broom into a dug-out hole. Another method is to build a tent-like structure of branches and leaves to cover some of the emergence holes. By closing the other emergence holes, the termites have to emerge from the holes in the tent structure, which has an opening on one side to which the flying termites are attracted by artificial light, sunlight or moonlight. Near this opening, a receptacle is placed to collect the termites. Osmaston (1951) mentions from Uganda a complicated structure of clay pipes constructed over the emergence holes and leading to the receptacle. He and several of my informants reported that drumming on the ground triggers certain termite species to emerge.

Soldiers from the larger species are also eaten. To extract them from the mounds, saliva-wetted grass blades are lowered into the shafts of opened termite mounds. In defence, the soldiers bite into the blades and are then subsequently stripped from the blades into a container. They can either be fried or pounded into a cake. Sometimes only the heads are eaten (Uganda)." (van Huis 1996)

They had few clothes and little food, but they made do with what God give them.

God gave them poverty, starvation, and short, miserable, insect-eating lives for the crime of being born in the wrong place. How does that relate to your "equal LURVE for all"? It would seem He must love Americans "more equally" than Africans, since He directs our souls to be born in one of the wealthiest nations on His Earth. Or do you also not believe in pre-existence of the soul?

Jeremiah 1:5

Before I formed thee in the belly I knew thee; and before thou camest forth out of the womb I sanctified thee, and I ordained thee a prophet unto the nations.

If God knew one prophet before he was formed in the womb, then it's logical that He knew us all. He decides where we are to be born. Therefore, He decided that Africans would be born into abject poverty, as befits the cursed descendants of Ham.

It is deeply insulting that you refer to any one of his precious creations as 'savage beasts'. In fact, I'd go as far to say that it's sinful.

Really? How about if I refer to people of other races as "dogs"? Would that be appropriate?

Before you answer, I suggest you read the Bible.

Mark 7

25 For a certain woman, whose young daughter had an unclean spirit, heard of him, and came and fell at his feet:

26 The woman was a Greek, a Syrophenician by nation; and she besought him that he would cast forth the devil out of her daughter.

27 But Jesus said unto her, Let the children first be filled: for it is not meet to take the children's bread, and to cast it unto the dogs.

28 And she answered and said unto him, Yes, Lord: yet the dogs under the table eat of the children's crumbs.

Perhaps you should reflect whether those words really were appropriate.

Mine, or the words of Jesus, the Living God? Or are you going to tell HIM that His words aren't appropriate?

Or is it just the fact Africans have a different color of skin that you cannot fathom?

I see you are a racist as well as a hippie.

Neither I nor the True Christians™ at Landover Baptist Church are racists. Any Negro can be Saved©, if he chooses to give up the Negro lifestyle and become an ex-Negro. Perhaps you'd like to ask Remy LeBeau about becoming an ex-Negro.

I do hope you will someday read the Bible and understand that God loves and rewards only those who follow every one of His Laws. Then, perhaps you can join us in the Heaven described in the Bible, where people have no gender, are not married, and spend all day every day praising the Lord in His glorious presence. (You haven't been filling those poor AIDS-crazed Africans' minds with anti-Christian materialistic fantasies about paradise and eternal wealth and leisure, have you? Oh, dear.)

[Don the Baptist]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

Dear Don the Baptist and Rev Rodimer,

1. Can I ask whether you are in the habit of addressing your brothers and sisters in Christ as 'hippie' and 'retard'?

2. As for Don the Baptist's suggestion that Jesus was "fair skinned with blond hair and blue eyes", that's the most ludicrous thing I've ever heard. On what authority do you base that comment?

1. NO, absolutely not, I would never call a brother or sister in Christ a hippie or a retard and I am sure that brother Rodimer would not as well. I WOULD however call you a hippie and/or retard - you make ridiculous accusations after we tried to share the love of Christ with you. What else could I call you after that slap in the face? I am truly hurt and offended by you sir! Pray with me won't you?

2. As I have said many times - I do NOT need references for things that are commonly accepted truth. Jesus was a white man and WE all know that, therefore only hippies and retards demand proof for same!

[Jacques Anape]

Re: Spreading the word of Christ. Is this the right way?

The posts on this thread are seeping with racism, and quite frankly I am going to have to withdraw and pray for a while.

Some folks here are exhibiting traits that I'm sure 99% of American Christians would find to be appauling.

As for your theology, it's way off base.

I am not going to stoop to your level of personal insults, because that only saddens the God who we all love. When you speak of God's 'hate', you are misusing scripture and cherry-picking and manipulating it to suit your own agenda. Which appears to be an agenda of hate. John 3:16 says God loves the world, so can someone tell me which part of the world He does not love?

I suspect I am not going to get anywhere on that point, as you have all seemingly made up your minds. But here are two much simpler questions that demand an answer, as I have not heard teaching like this in ANY OTHER CHRISTIAN CHURCH. Please answer with SCRIPTURAL AUTHORITY:

1. Where is the Bible does it say African-Americans have no souls or where does it suggest that there is a separate Heaven for folks of different races? This anti-Biblical nonsense is the type spouted by the KKK 40 years ago. I thought we had moved beyond that, but clearly not in Freehold, Iowa.

2. Where in the Bible does it say Jesus had blond hair? Use your common sense, He was born in the Middle East so he looked like a Middle Eastern person!! Now why is that so hard for you to accept? Think about that last point before responding.