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Listen, the over-religous BS that is regurgitated onto this forum is horrendous, if a girl is raped, she should NOT marry the rapist, if people want to have lots of sex out of wedlock, let them, harry potter is not going to turn your children satanist, video games are not evil. The stupidity on here is insane, i'll use the bible as toilet paper to wipe the shit that is your opinions, listen meet a real god, Tucker Max, he has had sex with hundreds of women, butt sex, sex with midgets, you name it he has done it, is he going to hell? No, you know why? Because he is a straight up pimp, that is all there is too it. And since Tucker Max is god, Hugh Hefner is jesus, because we all know he created the REAL bible, Playboy Magazine, and he still has sex(out of wedlock as well) at 83 years old!
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Alright, whatever you say. I hope you enjoy burning in the lake of fire for all of eternity.Originally posted by TheBibleSucksAss View Post
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
I concur, and offer my deepest gratitudes to the author of this post, for he has shown me the true path. His trenchant insight into the life of the saint Tucker Max warms mine heart and brings a tear to mine eye. I now see clearly that I have been lead astray my entire life. I have spent my life waiting for the arrival of our savior, jesus christ, and I have been so fully indulged in this quest that I have failed to recognize our his presence right in our very own internets. I hereby renounce baptist, and annouceme my conversion to Tuckermaxism (a recognized subsect of JCPism.) This is the true holy relegion, and the righteus path. A path that encourages the intake of large amounts of alchohol, and illicit sex with unknown females (the lesser sex.) I encrouage ye members, and the people who I have called by brothers for the countless years of my life, to rise up, and renounce the faith, and instead, allow the man, the legend, the saint, Tucker Max, a place on your alter and in your heart.
AMEN!!!Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
I haven't heard of Tucker Max since I wrote a sermon against internet dating back in 2000.
I wasn't aware he was still alive.Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Crimminy! 4ChanTrolls!!!Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household.Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Stop the gay bashing NOW!
Why the hatred? Why the intolerance? This is (have you looked at a calendar lately?) the year 2010!
TheBibleIsASuccess and IhartJebus may be "gay", but they're human beings, too...fellow residents of (have you looked at a calendar lately?) the year 2010!
If you can't get over your precious Landover Racist Church doctrine, can you at least stop the gay bashing of people like them? They haven't done anything to you and just want to live in peace, tolerated for who they inherently are.
PS: In case you didn't know, Hate Crimes, including Internet Bullying, carry a very steep penalty, if you don't know already. Because this is (have you looked at a calendar lately?) the year 2010!Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
I'm not sure, Reverend but it could have something to do with this.Originally posted by Rev. Jim Osborne View Post
Christians are superior because we possess an understanding that unbelievers lack. It is through the Power of Jesus only the converted mind is able to understand what is going on in the world; what the Communists are really up to; what Satan's intentions are. Most unbelievers do not even believe in Satan and cannot understand his tactics.
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Oh well, I guess I should abandon my husband and my children and run off on a whoring frenzy because some troll on the internet told me too.
Oh wait, I won't be doing that because I love my husband, I love my children and I LOVE JESUS.
And my chastity belt will be staying firmly in place.Drama queenComment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
That is quite possibly the most horrific post ever inflicted upon this forum -- how DARE you infect my brain with that image ...Originally posted by IisNOTASuccess View Post
... oh dear LORD, it's a moving image too! A blur of scrawny wrinkled buttocks, blond hair and vast mountainous mounds; I cannot pray this out of my mind fast enough!True Christians are Perfect!
Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.
Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.
For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
My dear departed late husband Alfred was 85 when he went off to Jesus.Originally posted by Mrs. Rogers View Post
Praise the Lord I never had to see him naked.
Sister Talitha
Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.
HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Let us spare a thought for Jesus who had to. Elderly men are proof that this is indeed a Fallen Creation; especially the 'Fallen' part, which is evident when one is unfortunate enough to catch a glimpse of old gentlemanly flesh.Originally posted by Talitha View Post
I never leave home without my glasses now, lest I wander into the wrong restroom at church.True Christians are Perfect!
Signs that you belong to a FALSE Christian Church.
Persecution You Have Endured for CHRIST: what doesn't kill you makes you stronger in Christ.
For True Christians™ only: please send me Project Habakkuk updates at gertruderogers@landoverbaptist.net. Thank you.Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
Listen you CHASTITY MONSTERS he is saying is ,no not to run away from your husband and fucl{ all day which you probably do anyway..... and stop believing in the bible so much get a life and look around for a sec..... hugh the greatest sex symbol of all sex stifler the sex god himself and TUCKER the bunz king of all time he my fellow no bunz religous people is like zues or whatever that greek god is you know religion is out for the money now and you morons or should i say easily trick retards just follow whatever this make believe man on a cross did........so loosen your chastity belts stop being such a god damn herb and take a firm step into realityComment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
That post reminded me of those random word spam emails that used to be a problem on the internets. Remember those things? This post was just as annoying and nonsensical. I wonder if a real person typed those words on purpose or if it was generated by some sort of Artificial Ignorance computer program.Originally posted by FUC]{THEBIBLE View PostProfessor of Creation Science and Flood Geology at Landover Baptist University
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Sodomites! Stop being gay TODAY!
Wherefore lay apart all filthiness and superfluity of naughtiness, and receive with meekness the engrafted word, which is able to save your souls. James 1:21Comment
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Re: TAKE OFF YOUR CHASTITY BELTS!
That explains things Brother, Thank you.Originally posted by Professor Bessemer View Post
Drama queenComment
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