[Off Base]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Well, are you still a clean virgin or are you already a spoiled disgusting man tool?

If you must know, I was actually married right after high school. Big mistake. Six months into marriage, he got his cheating ass kicked to the curb for bumping uglies with the lady who lived in the next apartment.

I've dated guys since then. Yes, I've had sex. I have physical needs, but I don't have any desire to get married again any time soon.

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

If you must know, I was actually married right after high school. Big mistake. Six months into marriage, he got his cheating ass kicked to the curb for bumping uglies with the lady who lived in the next apartment.

I've dated guys since then. Yes, I've had sex. I have physical needs, but I don't have any desire to get married again any time soon.

See what happens when you choose satanic husbands. Now you have gone and got youself into a bind haven't you?

[Off Base]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

See what happens when you choose satanic husbands. Now you have gone and got youself into a bind haven't you?

What bind?

Truth is, I'm a non-Christian deist. I believe in God, but not the one described in the Bible.

However, even were I Christian, all I would have to do is ask Jesus to forgive me and *poof* sin-be-gone!

[God Hates Me]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Satanic kicks ass in my oppinion... like I said... Freedom from fools who think having testicles makes them better

[Off Base]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Satanic kicks ass in my oppinion... like I said... Freedom from fools who think having testicles makes them better

Right on! Grrl power, all the way!

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

What bind?

Truth is, I'm a non-Christian deist. I believe in God, but not the one described in the Bible.

However, even were I Christian, all I would have to do is ask Jesus to forgive me and *poof* sin-be-gone!

You would have to mean it, Jesus can see through your lies.

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Satanic kicks ass in my oppinion... like I said... Freedom from fools who think having testicles makes them better

Right on! Grrl power, all the way!

OB, you should have learned your lesson after you chose a satanic unGodly husband. Did you not see what happened? If you had chosen a True Christian™ husband, you would be happily married with many children to tend to.

GHM- Don't be foolish, can't you see what happened to OB when she went with Satanic instead of Godly.

[God Hates Me]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

You would have to mean it, Jesus can see through your lies.

and you couldnt with a lie detector so stop thinking YOU'RE a good and go fetch

[God Hates Me]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

and you couldnt with a lie detector so stop thinking YOU'RE a good and go fetch

Stop thinking you're a GOD* typo there...

[Ebenezer Wright]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Stop thinking you're a GOD* typo there...

I would never EVER suggest to you that I am God! Do you think I am looking for a quick pass to hell just like you?

[God Hates Me]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

GHM- Don't be foolish, can't you see what happened to OB when she went with Satanic instead of Godly.

I see what happened with you and you're making me sick... and Godly is boring... at least satanic can keep my cold heart warm...

[Brother Lindh]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

What are the requirements, in terms of website membership?

It is not complicated to become a TCM (True Christian Member). First of all you MUST titeeth. Secondly, you must buy from the LB Store. And finally, you must be physically sound including your teeth. As an example, I am a True Christian, have belonged to this forum for 5 years (survived the putche and came back) buy from the store and have sent money via the Godly PalPal button. But, as you will note, my teeth prevent me from becoming a member. Very simply, God (and L rejects those with bad teeth. Nonetheless, I continue in my struggle in the service of the SS (Saved Souls), and to titeeth and to buy Jesus thongs from the store. My Mentor, the Late Pastor Pistle, once recommended me for membership, but to no avail. Pleasant dreams.

[Nobar King]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Becoming a True Christian is easy: read the Bible and do what it says.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

I see what happened with you and you're making me sick... and Godly is boring... at least satanic can keep my cold heart warm...

If you think going to hell for all eternity is going to be "fun,"then I urge you to read THIS.

[Captain_Asshat]

Re: How To Become a 'True Christian' Member?

Becoming a True Christian is easy: read the Bible and do what it says.

Noober-dude! It ain't THAT easy! I been tryin' ta make it as a True ChristerTM for while now, an I STILL ain't one!

Tho' think Im pretty colse now! Pastor Zeek said he's make me one when Hell freez over, so recon that's got me in wi a shot!

Hey, plus i aint been infacted all that much... mus be doin somethin rite??? I jus gotta get my hate-on... you know, start hatin gay people cos they got AIDS or somethin??? Recon that what holdin me back??

I spoke to God about it (His face appeared ta me in a bucket of Ben an Jerry's) an he said I in wi a shot! Praise the Lord!

- Captain A.