Brothers and Sisters, I have some sad news.
A few months ago I posted this national news story regarding Brother Obed Tuckett, a member of Landover's Anti-Demon Task Force™. Brother Tuckett, who had been dispatched to the greater tri-state area to neutralize demon-possessed birds, made headlines for tracking a vampire peacock to a fast-food parking lot and heroically pummeling it into a coma. It was later euthanized. LBC's staff was so pleased by Obed's achievement that they sent him on a special mission to Eastern Europe, the details of which have been deemed too sensitive to release to the congregation.
However, our pastors recently received the tragic news that Brother Tuckett has fallen in the line of duty.
Pastors have spoken with the Russian authorities and confirmed the deceased to be Brother Tuckett, and paramilitary action against the zoo's aviary is in the planning stages.
A memorial service and duck hunt will be held in his honor this Wednesday. All are encouraged to attend.

~1975-2007~
A few months ago I posted this national news story regarding Brother Obed Tuckett, a member of Landover's Anti-Demon Task Force™. Brother Tuckett, who had been dispatched to the greater tri-state area to neutralize demon-possessed birds, made headlines for tracking a vampire peacock to a fast-food parking lot and heroically pummeling it into a coma. It was later euthanized. LBC's staff was so pleased by Obed's achievement that they sent him on a special mission to Eastern Europe, the details of which have been deemed too sensitive to release to the congregation.
However, our pastors recently received the tragic news that Brother Tuckett has fallen in the line of duty.
Man Killed by Owl He Tried to Steal from Moscow Zoo
A man has died after being attacked by an owl he tried to steal from Moscow zoo, the Komsomolskaya Pravda daily reported.
The incident took place on Tuesday night. Zoo workers found the body of the 32-year old man near the wild birds’ cage. An owl was missing from the nearest compertment.
Most likely, the man got into the zoo at night intending to steal a bird. He climbed over the fense and broke the cage where an owl lived. “The place was covered with feathers, at first we thought that the owl flew away,” zoo workers told reporters. However, soon the bird was discovered hiding in the bushes. The owl was bruised and frightened, but alive.
Prosecutors, who started investigation into the man’s death, said it was obvious that the bird fought the thief fiercely. The cage and the zoo fence were covered in blood drops. Investigators say that the man tried to climb the fence wit the bird in his hands but fell and collapsed after his head hit a cage. The man died of hypothermia after lying several hours unconscious on the cold ground.
A man has died after being attacked by an owl he tried to steal from Moscow zoo, the Komsomolskaya Pravda daily reported.
The incident took place on Tuesday night. Zoo workers found the body of the 32-year old man near the wild birds’ cage. An owl was missing from the nearest compertment.
Most likely, the man got into the zoo at night intending to steal a bird. He climbed over the fense and broke the cage where an owl lived. “The place was covered with feathers, at first we thought that the owl flew away,” zoo workers told reporters. However, soon the bird was discovered hiding in the bushes. The owl was bruised and frightened, but alive.
Prosecutors, who started investigation into the man’s death, said it was obvious that the bird fought the thief fiercely. The cage and the zoo fence were covered in blood drops. Investigators say that the man tried to climb the fence wit the bird in his hands but fell and collapsed after his head hit a cage. The man died of hypothermia after lying several hours unconscious on the cold ground.
A memorial service and duck hunt will be held in his honor this Wednesday. All are encouraged to attend.

~1975-2007~
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