Tweet
Won't you kids please, PLEASE get off his lawn? For Christ's Sake, it's his Birth-day!
-
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Happy Birthday young man. I know you have Gods blessing so you already have everything of value. I signed you up for the Omaha Steak of the month club. Enjoy.Isaiah 45:7 I form the light, and create darkness: I make peace, and create evil: I the LORD do all these things.
Amos 3:6 Shall a trumpet be blown in the city, and the people not be afraid? shall there be evil in a city, and the LORD hath not done it?
Numbers 21:6 And the LORD sent fiery serpents among the people, and they bit the people; and much people of Israel died.
Matthew 10:34 Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword.
Matthew 10:35 For I am come to set a man at variance against his father, and the daughter against her mother, and the daughter in law against her mother in law.
Matthew 10:36 And a man's foes shall be they of his own household. -
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Blessed birthday, ya old fart! May you grace us with many more years of your wisdom!Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Happy Birthday. I hope you never suffer a barking dog again.Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Give thanks to Jesus that He has allowed you to live for another year! And don't forget to send in your birthday tithe!
Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:
Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)
Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Hm, I expected to wake up in Heaven by now. Seems Jesus has more sinners for me to save.
My annual bring-your-own-meat BBQ is next Saturday. If someone gives me cake there will be cake.5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
- Protect your family the Christian way! Get your daughter raped!
- Only Sluts Get Raped! (1st Timothy 2:9)
- Down syndrome is a lifestyle choice!
James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Your astrological week ahead, with Psychic Bob
01-06-11
Gemini (21 MAY-20 JUN)
Financial disaster as your website rating MPs by their sexiness is hit with several thousand lawsuits for vomit damage.Posted via Pasta
True Pastafarian™
May my Sauce be with you!
Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
The Loose Canon - HTML version
Loose Canon Fan Page
North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
I have been to The Volcano!
Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Please forgive me if I'm confused, and I probably am, but...Originally posted by SUV View Post
Did you just take our Lord's name in vain?
WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Anyway, Happy Birthday, Cranky Old Man! Is your wife doing something special for your birthday?WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Stone her, next thing you know she will be telling you the fish is good enough for Jehovah!Originally posted by Faith_Machine View PostPlease forgive me if I'm confused, and I probably am, but...
Did you just take our Lord's name in vain?
Posted via Pasta
True Pastafarian™
May my Sauce be with you!
Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
The Loose Canon - HTML version
Loose Canon Fan Page
North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
I have been to The Volcano!
Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
may you use your next year informing us of many things God hates, Mr Man!Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
¡Feliz Cumple Viejo Gruñón!
Happy Birthday!
YIC, Mari
Ex JW and quiet, shy, timid girl who wants to be a True Cristian Lady.
My favorite verse from the Bible is:
- A true WITNESSE deliuereth soules: but a deceitfull WITNESSE speaketh lyes.Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
Jo Freddie, I know it's not explicitly stated in the rules that Unsaved Trash are not allowed to call for the stoning of True Christians™, but I think that's pretty much implied.
Also, since she is a True Christian™, I believe she gets the benefit of the doubt, and unless we're told otherwise, we have to assume that there's been a simple misunderstanding.WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
You are the one accusing her of a stoneable offence. I mealy highlight the consequences of such an accusation according to the KJV-CFT.Originally posted by Faith_Machine View PostPosted via Pasta
True Pastafarian™
May my Sauce be with you!
Read the TRUE Gospel The Gospel of the Flying Spaghetti Monster (ISBN 978-0-00-723160-7)
Get one and get with The Flying Spaghetti Monster
The Loose Canon - HTML version
Loose Canon Fan Page
North American? Speak English? Thank a Pirate.
I have been to The Volcano!
Comment
-
Re: Blessed Birthday, CRANKY OLD MAN!
I did no such thing!
I merely asked her if she'd committed such an offense. If she says no, that's good enough for me!WARNING:
In accordance with article 7 of the Swaggart Amendment to the Landover Baptist Church Constitution, you are hereby notified that this forum user is a
REGISTERED SPIRITUAL PREDATOR, and prohibited from sending or receiving personal messages, text messages, or instant messages to forum users below the rank of True Christian™. This user is further prohibited from engaging with any persons in real-time audio or video "chats" via Web cams, Skype, Facetime, or any other Internet audio/video technology or service.Comment
Comment