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Brothers and Sisters,
As part of our political action duty as True Christians, I would like to introduce you to a fellow True Christian running for public office in Virginia. As we all know, DieBold and it's liberal funders stole the election from the GOP last year and gave the state to 0bama under direct orders from the Clintons. Now it is time to rise up and hand the state back to the GOP and teach Satan a lesson!!
Introducing the next governor of Virginia: Bob McDonnell!
A True American(tm) through and through, this man has served his country since he could walk. Born and raised in Virginia, he is a War Hero* who is not afraid to stand up for what is right, namely not-the-Democrats.
Following Sarah Palin's example, he quit his job as Virginia's Attorney General, a position he won in a landslide by over three hundred votes after spending only double what his opponent spent, to run for Governor, clearly subscribing to the proven leadership technique of such great leaders as Sarah Palin, among countless others.
Bob on the issues:
1. Women in the workplace: AGAINST
In his thesis at the prestigious Regent University for the Saved(tm), Bob wrote an entire thesis entitled The Republican Party's Vision for the Family: The Compelling Issue of The Decade on the place of women in society, and I'll break it down for you: they belong in the kitchen. A working woman, he proudly believes, is "detrimental to the family". Praise Jesus I like him already!
2. Birth Control: AGAINST
In the same thesis, which has since become a staple of the GOP in referencing their opinions in an "academic" paper, Bob spends a Godly portion railing against the evils of contraception. He calls it for what it is: completely illogical! Why any single woman (or man!) would want, much less need, birth control is completely beyond me, and I was ranked #1 in my class here at Landover! Illogical is RIGHT
3. Divorce: EXTRA AGAINST
Once again, Bob stands up for what is right, and divorce, except in extreme cases where one is really really sure that God wants him to get divorced, is always wrong. In fact, Bob has proposed that, in addition to marriage being defined as a man-and-person-with-a-cooter bond, that divorce should be all but impossible to get!
4. Homosexuality: AGAINST
When asked about government intervention, Bob gives the standard tried-and-true line about governments governing least. Except in one stellar circumstance: homosexuality. In fact, he even lumped it in with two other heinous crimes: drug abuse and pornography, stating that he believes that the government should "restrain, punish and deter" those who would engage in such behavior.
5. Drill Baby Drill: CHAMPING AT THE BIT
Bob, being the progressive thinker that he obviously is, demands that we drill in the vast oil fields known to exist off of the coast of Virginia. Despite his detractors' patently false claims that "there is no reasonable amount of oil in these fields", since there is only six months worth of oil there that would take almost 10 years to extract, Bob has remained committed to his mantra of "drill here, drill now", drowning out the voices of critics and other solutions alike.
Join me in donating to his cause, won't you? And if you can't afford to support him, aside from questioning how you managed to come to this board, I would ask that you speak with a Pastor immediately about how come Jesus chose not to bless you.
PRAISE JESUS, BOB MCDONNELL FOR GOVERNOR!
* In the sense that he actually reported for duty.
As part of our political action duty as True Christians, I would like to introduce you to a fellow True Christian running for public office in Virginia. As we all know, DieBold and it's liberal funders stole the election from the GOP last year and gave the state to 0bama under direct orders from the Clintons. Now it is time to rise up and hand the state back to the GOP and teach Satan a lesson!!
Introducing the next governor of Virginia: Bob McDonnell!
A True American(tm) through and through, this man has served his country since he could walk. Born and raised in Virginia, he is a War Hero* who is not afraid to stand up for what is right, namely not-the-Democrats.
Following Sarah Palin's example, he quit his job as Virginia's Attorney General, a position he won in a landslide by over three hundred votes after spending only double what his opponent spent, to run for Governor, clearly subscribing to the proven leadership technique of such great leaders as Sarah Palin, among countless others.
Bob on the issues:
1. Women in the workplace: AGAINST
In his thesis at the prestigious Regent University for the Saved(tm), Bob wrote an entire thesis entitled The Republican Party's Vision for the Family: The Compelling Issue of The Decade on the place of women in society, and I'll break it down for you: they belong in the kitchen. A working woman, he proudly believes, is "detrimental to the family". Praise Jesus I like him already!
2. Birth Control: AGAINST
In the same thesis, which has since become a staple of the GOP in referencing their opinions in an "academic" paper, Bob spends a Godly portion railing against the evils of contraception. He calls it for what it is: completely illogical! Why any single woman (or man!) would want, much less need, birth control is completely beyond me, and I was ranked #1 in my class here at Landover! Illogical is RIGHT
3. Divorce: EXTRA AGAINST
Once again, Bob stands up for what is right, and divorce, except in extreme cases where one is really really sure that God wants him to get divorced, is always wrong. In fact, Bob has proposed that, in addition to marriage being defined as a man-and-person-with-a-cooter bond, that divorce should be all but impossible to get!
4. Homosexuality: AGAINST
When asked about government intervention, Bob gives the standard tried-and-true line about governments governing least. Except in one stellar circumstance: homosexuality. In fact, he even lumped it in with two other heinous crimes: drug abuse and pornography, stating that he believes that the government should "restrain, punish and deter" those who would engage in such behavior.
5. Drill Baby Drill: CHAMPING AT THE BIT
Bob, being the progressive thinker that he obviously is, demands that we drill in the vast oil fields known to exist off of the coast of Virginia. Despite his detractors' patently false claims that "there is no reasonable amount of oil in these fields", since there is only six months worth of oil there that would take almost 10 years to extract, Bob has remained committed to his mantra of "drill here, drill now", drowning out the voices of critics and other solutions alike.
Join me in donating to his cause, won't you? And if you can't afford to support him, aside from questioning how you managed to come to this board, I would ask that you speak with a Pastor immediately about how come Jesus chose not to bless you.
PRAISE JESUS, BOB MCDONNELL FOR GOVERNOR!
* In the sense that he actually reported for duty.
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