Romney takes the lead!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

In the latest poll from Rasmussen, Romney has a 4 point lead . . . more than the margin of error!

Romney: 47%
Obama: 43%
I can't decide between a Muslim and a Mormon: 5%
Just kill me now: 5%

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Well the four time lead in a Rassemun poll is a first time ever for Romney. Cleary these unfair attacks against Romney aren't working!

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Well the four time lead in a Rassemun poll is a first time ever for Romney. Cleary these unfair attacks against Romney aren't working!

We who make our living in politics know the Rassemun Poll is a liberal organization. Our guy Mitt is probably so far ahead he is unbeatable.

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Since my company recently signed an exclusive contract to run our nation's now-privatized elections for the next 99 years, I can assure you that whatever the polls say, Mitt Romney will win by a landslide in the next election. My technical people who run the data center tell me that out of the 100 million registered voters in America, at least 300 million of them will be voting for Romney this November.

Of course, we will have poll watchers to make sure that this is a free and fair election. We have to guard against the possibility that the union thugs might try to disrupt the elections with their #Occupy protests - which is why we'll be arresting them in advance of election day and holding them for awhile (or indefinitely) in Guantanamo Bay.


Pink unicorns deployed as poll
watchers ensure a fair election

The USA is fast becoming a model of democracy that is praised and imitated around the world. Why just yesterday, the Cambodian president (who has been in power since 1979) told me that he wants to adopt the American electoral system for his country. His son, who will inherit the country in perhaps another decade, is also very interested. We've even had inquiries from North Korea which is thinking of adopting our model for their first-ever election.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Since my company recently signed an exclusive contract to run our nation's now-privatized elections for the next 99 years, I can assure you that whatever the polls say, Mitt Romney will win by a landslide in the next election.

Are you sure a landslide is a good idea? We don't want people to think there might be something wrong with your equipment, like in "Man of the Year" (comedy with all-Jew lead cast, written and directed by what else (Barry Levinson), in which Robin Williams wins the Presidency due to a computer error).

Maybe something really, really close, like they did in 2000. Now THAT was a clever election! Liberals stayed home in droves in 2004, knowing that their votes wouldn't count anyway.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

I think we are seeing a brilliant text book lesson on how to campaign for the Presidency.

The jobs numbers improve, Romney says he could do better.

Romney is accused of not paying income taxes, he says he won't release his tax returns.

Romney has diplomatic visits with world leaders. He tells them they have scewed up

Romney is slowly building a mystique of a leader who is on a higher level. Not a Christ-like figure, of course, but someone God has clearly chosen to lead us.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Good grief, when I first saw the thread title I thought he'd been shot!

YiC,

Zech

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

Good grief, when I first saw the thread title I thought he'd been shot!

Hi Brother Zech. I think you're getting confused by that shooting at the Sick Temple in Wisconsin. I was listening to Rush Limbaugh just a few minutes ago, and he was explaining how Sickism is some kind of Muslim sect in India, and they've been fighting with them Shittight Muslims for centuries because they wanna wear different kinds of headscarves, or something like that.


Sick Muslim terrorist


Shittight Muslim

I know that at first glance, these Muslims all look the same, but we all should take the time to recognize the differences. It's part of being culturally sensitive.

Anyway, it's good to know what they look like, so we get our targets right when we take 'em out with our Predator drones. Not that I mind a little collateral damage, but too much can be embarrassing.

[Johny Joe Hold]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

As one who makes his living in politics, I think I know a good political horse when I see one. That one is Mitt.

Here is Iowa, he has been brilliant. He has opposed the federal subsidy of wind energy. Iowa is a small state and with 7,000 jobs in wind energy. To threaten such a big loss of jobs would be a bad move, normally.

But Mitt is playing to the heartstrings. He knows people who make the wind tubines and the thousands of farmers receiving payments for towers on their land feel guilty.

All of these people will vote for Mitt because they know they have been stealing money from the taxpayers.

Mitt has Iowa sewed up.

http://www.thehawkeye.com/story/BC-US--Presidential-Campaign-Wind-Energy-2nd-Ld-Writethru

[Free Market Fred]

Re: Romney takes the lead!

...He has opposed the federal subsidy of wind energy. Iowa is a small state and with 7,000 jobs in wind energy. To threaten such a big loss of jobs would be a bad move, normally...

I thought you might all be interested to know that two days ago, Congress passed a bill declaring the first week in October National Broccoli Week. As you might imagine, that was pretty non-controversial and it sailed right through with a 90% (veto-proof) majority. Even the Demoncrats voted for it.

Of course, it might not have gotten so many votes if the legislators had been paying attention and noticed that little rider attached at the last minute by my company's lobbyists.

The rider concerned "Wind Privatization." It declared that the wind is a public resource that belongs to the US guvmint, but can be leased to private individuals and companies through competitive no-bid contracts, just like cell phone bandwidth.

Fifteen minutes after National Broccoli Week was declared, my company bought the rights to all wind blowing in the USA. The lease is valid until year 2712. So in other words, all them wind farm operators in Iowa are stealing my company's private property! Our legal people will be sending out Cease & Desist letters on Monday, along with a demand to pay $3 million per wind tower to settle for the wind they've already stolen. For those who don't comply, the National Broccoli Week Act also includes a provision allowing the wind owner to take out uncooperative wind tower operators with Predator drones.

Oh yeah, forgot to mention that our lobbyists also got National Strawberry Week declared for the second week of October. The rider we attached to that allows us exclusive rights to all sunlight in the USA, so them solar power freaks are gonna be hearing from us real soon.

And then there's National Watermelon Week, which is why we own all the water (including the rain) in the USA. My lobbyists chose "watermelon" - great sense of humor, those guys!


Water thieves (view from Predator drone, just before impact)

About the air we breeze - there's the appropriately-named National Artichoke Week. More details on that later.