Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

[H. Montague Worthington]

I don't read many books besides the Bible, but I picked up Art Linkletter's fabulous and absolutely hilarious book, "Kids Say the Darndest Things."





Talk about comedy gold!!

I also admire Mr. Linkletter's work as spokesperson USA Next, a conservative alternative to the LIEberal AARP. USA Next, funded largely by pharmaceutical companies and conservative activists like direct-mail pioneer Richard Viguerie is fighting for seniors by "Building a Legacy of Freedom for America's Families." They are doing this by urging the privatization of Social Security, the banning of importation of inexpensive foreign drugs to the United States, helping to pass the $1 trillion Medicare Prescription Drug bill which ensures that collective bargaining cannot be used to lower drug prices, hiring advisors from the Swift Boat Veterans, promoting deregulation of energy to benefit Enron and other corporations, and being fined $554,000 for two misleading mailings in violation of the Social Security Act. All the liberal talk about USA Next being a hollow front group and slush fund for GOP attack money and corporate interests couldn't POSSIBLY be true, because Art Linkletter would NEVER sign off on something like that. He's a fine man.

The 95-year old conservative Republican is still making people laugh more than 45 years after his "Kids Say The Darndest Things" broke new ground in comedy with its cutting edge style.

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

The 95-year old conservative Republican is still making people laugh more than 45 years after his "Kids Say The Darndest Things" broke new ground in comedy with its cutting edge style.

And I think it takes a special kind of person to be able to convince folks to trim away the entitlement fat that threatens our innocent corporations. I know those lazy Demoncrats think they deserve a handout, but the LORD is the only person who deserves handouts (Please press the PayPal button at the bottom of your display). Anyway, in my travels I have found some very brave seniors who refuse to take advantage of our innocent corporations. And folks like my good friend below will get all the wealth they deserve in Heaven.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

Praise Jesus and thank you Brother Worthington for reintroducing this fine and Godly man to the younger members of our church. I'm sure that many of them may not know what excellent work he has done over a long, blessed lifetime of Christian service.

Art was a close, close friend of Walt Disney's back in the days before they cut his head off and cryogenically froze it. Another little known fact is that Art was actually born in Godless Canada, and mysteriously abandoned by his family shortly after birth. Luckily for him, Jesus guided a Godly evangelist to bring the boy to America and raise him as a Christian and a conservative.

Art was married and his wife bore him several children, one of whom was Diane. Unfortunately she was forced to take an illegal narcotic popular at the time called "LDS", and she died a horrible death. It seems that she jumped from her kitchen window because of these demonic drugs, and not at all because she walked in on her Godly father and Walt Disney in a compromising situation. Not at all.

Art was inspired by his daughter's gruesome death, and went on to preach the evils of drug use all across our great land during the turbulent 60's and 70's. He even won a Grammy for his recording "Dear Mom and Dad", which is unfortunately out of print. I'm searching for the lyrics online but without much success. Jesus, can you help out?


Some of my favorite quotes from Art Linkletter:

“I stand fearlessly for small dogs, the American Flag, motherhood and the Bible. That's why people love me.”

“I've learned it's always better to have a small percentage of a big success, than a hundred percent of nothing.”

“In the Top 40, half the songs are secret messages to the teen world to drop out, turn on, and groove with the chemicals and light shows at discotheques”

“Sometimes I'm asked by kids why I condemn marijuana when I haven't tried it. The greatest obstetricians in the world have never been pregnant.”

[Old Iron Crotch]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

Art was a close, close friend of Walt Disney's back in the days before they cut his head off and cryogenically froze it.
Urban legend - http://www.snes.com/disney/waltdisn/frozen.htm

Another little known fact is that Art was actually born in Godless Canada, and mysteriously abandoned by his family shortly after birth. Luckily for him, Jesus guided a Godly evangelist to bring the boy to America and raise him as a Christian and a conservative.
And how exactly does a newborn abandon his family? Wait, let me guess - it's one of those mysterious miracles that you folks use to explain anything that is either physically impossible or simply makes no sense


Art was married and his wife bore him several children, one of whom was Diane. Unfortunately she was forced to take an illegal narcotic popular at the time called "LDS", and she died a horrible death.
Another urban legend - http://www.snes.com/horrors/drugs/linkletter.asp

It seems that she jumped from her kitchen window because of these demonic drugs, and not at all because she walked in on her Godly father and Walt Disney in a compromising situation. Not at all.
I've searched for this and find no indication that it was ever a theory. Can you provide a non-LBC link?



Some of my favorite quotes from Art Linkletter:


“Sometimes I'm asked by kids why I condemn marijuana when I haven't tried it. The greatest obstetricians in the world have never been pregnant.”

Actually, there are many top-notch obstetricians who have indeed been pregnant. At the time Linkletter made that statement, medicine was primarily a male field. Not so any longer. My GP, my GYN, and my dentist are all female.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

I don't read many books besides the Bible, but I picked up Art Linkletter's fabulous and absolutely hilarious book, "Kids Say the Darndest Things."

And it's nice to see that the introduction's by Walt Disney as well. Of course, the company was horribly gayed up after his death, but back in the day, his pure and innocent cartoons would inspire all sorts of hateful wrath from the secularist bigots. Here you can see examples of how deranged, joyless leftists managed to project their own corrupted imaginations onto some nice, innocent Disney comics about Communist gooks and lazy hippies. Those filthy atheists will find something to criticise in anything.

[Mrs. Mary Whitford]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

Actually, there are many top-notch obstetricians who have indeed been pregnant. At the time Linkletter made that statement, medicine was primarily a male field. Not so any longer. My GP, my GYN, and my dentist are all female.

Why am I not surprised that you'd let a bunch of butch feminazis paw, grope and prod you? But that's not what's prompting my post. This is...

Another little known fact is that Art was actually born in Godless Canada, and mysteriously abandoned by his family shortly after birth. Luckily for him, Jesus guided a Godly evangelist to bring the boy to America and raise him as a Christian and a conservative.
And how exactly does a newborn abandon his family? Wait, let me guess - it's one of those mysterious miracles that you folks use to explain anything that is either physically impossible or simply makes no sense

Pastor Zeke clearly said that young Mr. Linkletter was abandoned by his Canuckistani parents, not the other way around. I never thought that retardation was contagious before, but it certainly seems to be making its way through the unSaved trash littering our Godly forum.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

Praise Jesus and thank you Brother Worthington for reintroducing this fine and Godly man to the younger members of our church. I'm sure that many of them may not know what excellent work he has done over a long, blessed lifetime of Christian service.

Art was a close, close friend of Walt Disney's back in the days before they cut his head off and cryogenically froze it. Another little known fact is that Art was actually born in Godless Canada, and mysteriously abandoned by his family shortly after birth. Luckily for him, Jesus guided a Godly evangelist to bring the boy to America and raise him as a Christian and a conservative.

Art was married and his wife bore him several children, one of whom was Diane. Unfortunately she was forced to take an illegal narcotic popular at the time called "LDS", and she died a horrible death. It seems that she jumped from her kitchen window because of these demonic drugs, and not at all because she walked in on her Godly father and Walt Disney in a compromising situation. Not at all.

Art was inspired by his daughter's gruesome death, and went on to preach the evils of drug use all across our great land during the turbulent 60's and 70's. He even won a Grammy for his recording "Dear Mom and Dad", which is unfortunately out of print. I'm searching for the lyrics online but without much success. Jesus, can you help out?


Some of my favorite quotes from Art Linkletter:

“I stand fearlessly for small dogs, the American Flag, motherhood and the Bible. That's why people love me.”

“I've learned it's always better to have a small percentage of a big success, than a hundred percent of nothing.”

“In the Top 40, half the songs are secret messages to the teen world to drop out, turn on, and groove with the chemicals and light shows at discotheques”

“Sometimes I'm asked by kids why I condemn marijuana when I haven't tried it. The greatest obstetricians in the world have never been pregnant.”

Well Praise God I have been blessed today. The song in question was actually called :"We love you, call collect", and it was released by Art shortly after his daughter took narcotics and jumped out her kitchen window. Jesus has guided me to the lyrics, which I'll share with you now. I hope you find them as moving and timeless as I did.

This morning a letter was returned
Stamped, moved, no address
It was one I wrote you
A couple of weeks ago

And it is now in my desk with
Other letters unopened and returned
Marked, moved, no address

I write again because I must
I hope my words will
Find you somehow, somewhere
Wherever you are at this moment, my dear
God grant, you are not alone

I've read there are
Thousands just like you
Searching for something
They failed to find at home

The fact that one of these is my daughter
Brings all of them close to me

Your mother's here
Standing right behind me
She never could resist looking
Over my shoulder as I write

Your leaving has been
Very difficult for her
A father, they say
Worries about his son but
For his daughter he has dreams

Well, my first dream for you
Was sixteen years ago on that day
We brought you home from the hospital
As we stood over your crib
We knew you were something special

In your cry, with all your strength
You served notice on the world
That you were someone important

Then years later
In a moment of anger, you cried
But you don't understand
And I didn't

Why were we never able
To unlock your frustration
And talk it away
Was it because you were being
Crowded too closely with love

There can be harm now
I realize in doing too much
As well as danger
In doing too little

A time for holding on
And a time for letting go
Someday, you too will discover
How much courage letting go takes

Your generation asks to be left alone
They want it so that
Each may find his own thing
But where is this thing
For which you search
Is it found by rejecting your heritage

What you are and can become
Has deep roots in many people
Your parents, your grandparents
And in a long line before them
Something in each one
Has helped make you what you are

I spoke about dreams
Let me tell you of the dreams
Another had for you
He was your grandfather

When he was young
He too, left his home
In search of something
A world of opportunity
And freedom for his spirit

And in his way, for his time
He too, was trying to find
Where it's at

Somewhere we have
A picture of your grandfather
He wore a beard
And his hair was long
And there was a girl
With him in that snapshot
Who wore several strings of beads
And held a single flower in her hand
Beautiful people

Don't reject this heritage
Top40db: The most accurate lyrics site on the net.
I beg you
Start with it and you can
Build something fine and strong

I can see you smiling at this
Last bit of cornball philosophy
Coming from your square old dad
But think hard about what I've said

Come back
Come back before you're trapped
In a life that daily grows
More aimless and unreal

With all my heart
I wish I could promise you
A world of flowers, music and dance
But could I keep such a promise
I don't think so
No one could

But one promise I can fulfill
If you return
We three can reach each other
By talking and listening

And I mean the kind of listening
That is also tuned to silence
There've been many times when
I've failed to read your silence
For this failure, I am truly sorry

Mother has remained
Behind me as I write
A second ago
She gently touched my shoulder
As she moved away

I took this, a silent approval
Of what I've written
She's now sitting in her chair
With an open book in her lap
But I know she's not seeing the words

Her thoughts, her thoughts
Are far away somewhere with you
It's very quiet here, too quiet

I walked into your room last night
And the walls seemed to be asking
For the sound of your voice

As much as I am aching
For the feel of your embrace
So please come back to us
We love you, call collect

Art's late daughter Diane recorded the "B" side of this remarkable single, and HER part was called "Dead Mom and Dad". I still cannot find those lyrics, but I shall continue to press Jesus to help me find them. GLORY!!

Oh and by the way, this recording won a Grammy award in 1969!

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

It is a sad day in Hollywood as one of the last decent people in the entire town has passed away....

TV's 'People Are Funny' host Art Linkletter dies

LOS ANGELES – Art Linkletter, whose "People Are Funny" and "House Party" shows entertained millions of TV viewers in the 1950s and '60s with the funny side of ordinary folks and who remained active as a writer and speaker through his ninth decade, died Wednesday. He was 97.

Linkletter died at his home in the Bel-Air section of Los Angeles, said his son-in-law, Art Hershey, the husband of Sharon Linkletter.

"He lived a long, full, pure life, and the Lord had need for him," Hershey said.

Linkletter had been ill "in the last few weeks time, but bear in mind he was 97 years old. He wasn't eating well, and the aging process took him," Hershey said.

Linkletter hadn't been diagnosed with any life-threatening disease, he said.

Linkletter was known on TV for his funny interviews with children and ordinary folks. He also collected their comments in a number of best-selling books.

"Art Linkletter's House Party," one of television's longest-running variety shows, debuted on radio in 1944 and was seen on CBS-TV from 1952 to 1969.

Though it had many features, the best known was the daily interviews with schoolchildren.

"On `House Party' I would talk to you and bring out the fact that you had been letting your boss beat you at golf over a period of months as part of your campaign to get a raise," Linkletter wrote.

"All the while, without your knowledge, your boss would be sitting a few feet away listening, and at the appropriate moment, I would bring you together," he said. "Now, that's funny, because the laugh arises out of a real situation."

Linkletter collected quotes from children into "Kids Say The Darndest Things," and it sold in the millions. The book "70 Years of Best Sellers 1895-1965" ranked "Kids Say the Darndest Things" as the 15th top seller among nonfiction books in that period.

The prime time "People Are Funny," which began on radio in 1942 and ran on TV from 1954 to 1961, emphasized slapstick humor and audience participation — things like throwing a pie in the face of a contestant who couldn't tell his Social Security number in five seconds, or asking him to go out and cash a check written on the side of a watermelon.

The down-to-earth charm of Linkletter's broadcast persona seemed to be mirrored by his private life with his wife of more than a half-century, Lois. They had five children, whom he wrote about in his books and called the "Links."

But in 1969, his 20-year-old daughter Diane jumped to her death from her sixth-floor Hollywood apartment. He blamed her death on LSD use, but toxicology tests found no LSD in her body after she died.

Still, the tragedy prompted Linkletter to become a crusader against drugs. A son, Robert, died in a car accident in 1980. Another son, Jack Linkletter, was 70 when he died of lymphoma in 2007.

Art Linkletter got his first taste of broadcasting with a part-time job while attending San Diego State College in the early 1930s. He graduated in 1934.

"I was studying to be an English professor," Linkletter once said. "But as they say, life is what happens to you while you're making other plans."

He held a series of radio and promotion jobs in California and Texas, experimenting with audience participation and remote broadcasts, before forming his own production company in the 1940s and striking it big with "People Are Funny" and "House Party."

Linkletter was born Arthur Gordon Kelly on July 17, 1912, in Moose Jaw, Saskatchewan. His unwed mother put him up for adoption when he was a baby; when he was about 7, he and his adoptive parents moved to the U.S., eventually settling in San Diego.

He recalled his preacher-father forced him to take odd jobs to help the family. So Linkletter left and became a hobo, hopping trains across the West, working where he could. He recalled later that he felt the religious faith instilled by his father had been a great gift.

After leaving daily broadcasting in 1969, Linkletter continued to write, lecture and appear in television commercials.

Among his other books, were "Old Age is Not for Sissies," "How To Be a Supersalesman," "Confessions of a Happy Man," "Hobo on the Way to Heaven" and his autobiography, '`I Didn't Do It Alone."

A recording Linkletter made with his daughter Diane not long before she died, "We Love You, Call Collect," was issued after her death and won a Grammy award for best spoken word recording.

"Life is not fair ... not easy," Linkletter said in a 1990 interview by The Associated Press. "Outside, peer pressure can wreak havoc with the nicest families. So that's the part that's a gamble.

"But I'm an optimist. Even though I've had tragedies in my life, and I've seen a lot of difficult things, I still am an optimist," he said.

Linkletter had extensive business interests. He headed a company involved in real estate development and management and operation of cattle ranches in Montana, New Mexico and California. He held interests in oil and gas wells, owned livestock in Australia and was involved in a solar energy firm.

He is survived by his wife, Lois, whom he married in 1935, and daughters Dawn Griffin and Sharon Linkletter, as well as seven grandchildren and 15 great-grandchildren.

I'll bet the man's early death was brought on by his disgust over what has happened to America under the jackbooted totalitarian nightmare of Barack Obama.

[BelieverInGod]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

I should go through the older threads, those lyrics brought a tear to my eye, and now I have to go hug each one of the kids just because. Although the older boys do hate it when mom gets all emotional on them.

I am sorry to hear about Mr. Linkletters passing, although I am glad he's in the arms of Jesus now. I enjoyed that show so much and was so disappointed when that idiot Cosby tried to rehash it.

[H. Montague Worthington]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

I am sorry to hear about Mr. Linkletters passing, although I am glad he's in the arms of Jesus now. I enjoyed that show so much and was so disappointed when that idiot Cosby tried to rehash it.

Add Art Linkletter's dignity, and fine reputation, as two more victims of the many assaults committed every year by Negro men.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Art Linkletter is a Fine Man

I am sorry to hear about Mr. Linkletters passing, although I am glad he's in the arms of Jesus now. I enjoyed that show so much and was so disappointed when that idiot Cosby tried to rehash it.

When those people are not stealing cars, bikes or pies, they're stealing comedy material!