[SUV]

Re: Your PPM?

...'cause he's Bad, Bad, Pastor Al
So bad he can't get a Christian gal!

Oops! Another story for another time for another thread.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Your PPM?

Pastor Pistle, suggesting such things about our sweet Sister SUV!

Sorry, I guess it was just that old case of genital herpes. My bad!

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Your PPM?

Is that a blister on your lip?

Pastor Pistle, suggesting such things about our sweet Sister SUV!

[SUV]

Re: Your PPM?

Is that a callous on your lip?

Pastor, how'd you like a Nice, big Braaaaack!ing for Christmas?

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Your PPM?

so as not to get my hands all red & calloused by working them over the keyboards too long

Is that a callous on your lip?

[SUV]

Re: Your PPM?

Oh, my record numbers in the hundreds!

This is because I do Prayer mentally only so as not to get my hands all red & calloused by working them over the keyboards too long

[ProdigalSon]

Re: Your PPM?

As well are all Net-fluent, most Landover Christians will have a Prayer Per Minute record. This record is very important because when sinners stop to listen, they usually only hang around for about a minute or two before they leave or in the computer sense, sign-off. To find your PPM, here's what you need to do.


*Get a minute timer

*Open up a Word Program

*Start the timer and as soon as it starts, you better hurry!

*Type in as many prayers praising the glory of God and his son Jesus as you can without forgetting the AMEN at the end.

*Shake off that writers cramp

*E-mail your prayers to some of your unsaved contacts.



my record is 85, I would like to hear some of the records of others.


P.S. Be careful not to end up with a limp-wrist!

I need some guidance from a True Christian™ about this one...Is copying and pasting Godly?

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Your PPM?

That's like asking "which is worstest: drinking a tad too much, eating at wendy's, sleeping through church or killing your neighbor"? To Jesus each sin is equal to the other!

23For the wages of sin is death

Luckily for us, those of us that have been chosen by God to be in Heaven for eternity have nothing to worry about, for we are washed as WHITE as SNOW. GLORY!

[tommy]

Re: Your PPM?

Who is more false?

Anglican or catholic?

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Your PPM?

If it's OK for Samson to go in unto harlots and despitefully use them, why not the good Pastor with Lilith?

[lilith]

Re: Your PPM?

I have. By a long shot.

We believe you Al. And NO we don't need proof.

[Marshall]

Re: Your PPM?

Since it's a womanly thing I am not a fast typer. Plus it's a dumb thing anyway since Jesus checks spelling.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Your PPM?

The only trouble here is that this fellow is a filthy Anglecan, false Christians all. They can "preach a sermon" endlessly because they make it all up as they go.

I wonder who has the record on sermon time here at Landover?

I have. By a long shot.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Your PPM?

A Warwickshire vicar got into the Guiness Book of Records after preaching non-stop for 48 hours.

Leamington Spa vicar and BBC Radio WM broadcaster the Reverend Mervyn Roberts finished his 48-hour sermon on Thursday.

Mr Roberts, from Bishop's Tachbrook, near Leamington Spa, worked his way through the Bible.

Mr Roberts was allowed meal breaks every 15 minutes but was not allowed to sleep.

Sue Roberts had faith in her husband

He attempted to break the record once before, but was forced to pull out on medical advice after he fell ill during the night.

Mr Roberts' wife, Sue Roberts, told the BBC's Midlands Today programme: "The Bible is a very long book and a very deep book and Mervyn has got a reputation for being able to talk."

The only trouble here is that this fellow is a filthy Anglecan, false Christians all. They can "preach a sermon" endlessly because they make it all up as they go.

I wonder who has the record on sermon time here at Landover?

[Enobarbus]

Re: Your PPM?

It could have been worse. He could have said.....no...never mind...I won't inflict that image on you

I am reminded of a quote about pornography that I read somewhere. It goes something to the effect that pornography serves no good purpose -- its object is to arouse carnal desire: but in the case of the young this is unecessary; in the case of the middle-aged it is inconvenient; and in the case of the aged it is unseemly.

I feel that this thread has gone some distance down the unseemly track and that it should be returned to the main-line as soon as possible. Let us get back to PPM and Jesus.

Thank you.