Fatties must DIEt or...

[Pastor Isaac Peters]

Re: Fatties must DIEt or...

Ted Haggard seemed to have quite a successful diet METHod, but now we all know his scandalous secret. One he shares with that Whiney Hou-stoned, I believe.

Yes, it's now crystal clear what his method was.

Here's a little incentive for True Christians™ to keep the pounds off. It's well known that lezbertarians idolize fatness. In fact, even nancy boys have gotten into the act with their "bear community." Before reaching for that extra slice of pizza, ask yourself whether you want a bunch of walrus-like sodomites to be warm for your form. I know I don't.

[Talitha]

Re: Fatties must DIEt or...

Thank you for raising this important matter Brother PP.
It is true that the good folk of Landover Bapti$t Church are all perfrctly proportioned.
Chubby chasers should also be avoided.
I apologise for this picture depicting in graphic detail what these fat Homers (probably Australian) look like, but it has to be known:

We have to be careful who we accuse of being a fattie especially as Jesus Christ© himself was wrongly accused.
Luke 7:34
The Son of man is come eating and drinking; and ye say, Behold a gluttonous man, and a winebibber, a friend of publicans and sinners!

Beware Gluttons and Winebibbers.


.

[OnYourKnees]

Re: Fatties must DIEt or...

Ted Haggard seemed to have quite a successful diet METHod, but now we all know his scandalous secret. One he shares with that Whiney Hou-stoned, I believe.

[Poetic Peter]

I wonder, when Jesus comes, will He be displeased
having to hoist so many larders Home?

This is why I am lean and trim:
because I respect my Lord. Because Jesus is not fat
I will not be fat.

Satan, on the other hand, loves to fry fat people.
Fatly unsaved sinners save satan from his needing oil.

FAT unsaved Christians go to hell in a frybasket.

Do you want to go to hell? No!
Do you want to burden God with your lifetime result of pie shoveling? No!

Well, it's high time, fatties, and almost never too late
to diet before you die.

The thin Landover Baptist is considerate to Jesus,
and a thin false christian does his/her bit, at least,
by adding to the overhead (requiring purchase of much mudslime oil) of satan's cooking costs.

----
DIET plans are requested.
Put your diet dish recipes and diet resolutions here.
How do you resist the temptation of food?

For myself it's simply a matter of cigarettes and booze.

Peter

PS: You will quickly note by avatars that all Landover True Christians®
are thin, ready, locked and loaded for a Second Coming soon!