Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples

[Glendora Christianson]

There is a big difference between secular personals and Christian personals. And I thought it might be a good idea for us to post a few bad examples, courtesy of the secular world. Anyway, I found a particularly disgusting ad on that very smutty craigslist.org. Feel free to ad more bad ads for educational purposes. Thanks, Mother Glynndie

Young Surfer Boy ISO Hot Straight Couple - m4mw - hello,
What a great day it is! I already got some surf in this morning and now I want to have some hot and wild fun with a HOT STRAIGHT COUPLE at my place or yours ASAP! I am 5'9", very athletic and lean body, 150lbs, a few tats, short light brown hair, very little body hair, smooth young skin, a clean,well kept and groomed 8 inch long and 2 inch thick circumsized xxxx. I posted some pics below, if you are interested send me yours and we'll take it from there..

[SUV]

(Uhhh....Mother Glynndie! Mother Glynndie! Have you seen BRIAN PEPPERS/Li'l Davey/Carnie Guy around here anywhere?)

SUV

[Bobby-Joe]

I ran across this one once;

Divorced White Male, 54 5’2” 275lbs bald.
Seeks single while female 18-30, blonde and big breasts a plus.
Stable employment status and NO law enforcement connections are must if you want to run with me baby. As you can see a hot item like me will be going so ladies so get you reply in soon.
No smokers please.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Do you meant this guy dear Sister?

(Uhhh....Mother Glynndie! Mother Glynndie! Have you seen BRIAN PEPPERS/Li'l Davey/Carnie Guy around here anywhere?)

SUV

[SUV]

Oh my GOD! What is it about that little Man that simply tears the Heart Right out of my chestal areas?

(As always, I kept my eyes averted from that Vulgar bulge coming from that pair of britches to the left of him. Jesus know I did!!!)

SUV

[Pastor Ezekiel]

I once saw this personal ad in a secular newspaper in Memphis:

I don't exept ignorant people!

My name is Angela. I am attractiveseriouse, tender, polite, romantic lady. I love music, travel, books, flowers, good company. I have traditional view at the family. I am looking for kind, relaible, considerate, intellectual gentleman who love a children and valye a family life. The man of my dream is tall( 5'10" and more), strong,gentle, loving, understanding.

Probably educated in public school.

[Ixi]

what makes you think she went to a public school?

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

The fact that she is such a dunce and cannot convey a simple THOUGHT?

[Ixi]

I think she seemed sweet.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

She seemed like the typical worldly WHORE seeking as many pee pee's in her woman-parts. Lucky for her, Satan is ready at a moment's notice.

[Brother Temperance]

I am looking for kind, relaible, considerate, intellectual gentleman who love a children...

In other words, her idea of a good time is a threesome involving a Catholic priest and a 12-year old polack.

I think she seemed sweet.

Sorry, not even whores like that go for emo queers like yourself.

[Glendora Christianson]

Dear Lord, I Found a Doozey!

Folks, please don't read on, unless you are very sure about your own personal salvation. I can't believe what qualifies as a personal ad in the sexular world! DISTURBED MOTHER GLENDORA

I need 1 or 2 women to FXXX me with a strap on!! - m4ww - 26

i need 1 or 2 women who want to Fxxx a young guy with a strap-on...

id get a nice hotel room, supply the "tools"

you just show up ready to make me sxxx and fxxx your rubber cxxx...

i am a good looking athletic grad student...have played with toys but my axx is still virgin territory so be the first...bring a friend if you want to tag team me...

hoping to do this soon...

[Hushed_Agony]

Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples

Lumberjack seeks companion

Must be able to supply your own chain lube. A 18" bar is most acceptable.
I am a hard starter, but once pulled, I fire right up.
No wood to big to conquer, no sapplings allowed.
Would prefer dressed in flannels and a unionsuit. (That buttflap is so sexy)
Can you get my motor started?
Instead of knocking the wood down, let's bring it up
call me at XXX-XXX-XXXX

Remind me to hide not in the trees, but somewhere far far away from this filth.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples

Tinkerbell Seeking Hook Tired of unfaithful Peters. 45, 5'2/115, auburn brown-wide eyes IMP. Ready for the Hook. Save me! I still believe.

Lost Boys need not apply.



what a filthy, wanton slut...I winced when I read that ad.

[Talitha]

Re: Bad Personal Ads, Post Your Examples

I don't know if I understood this Thread.....

But I'm Posting anyway.
Kitty Fiddling should be against the Law!!