Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

[H. Montague Worthington]

Please join me in prayers for Rev. Gary Aldridge, who was led astray by the homersexual deathstyle agenda.

And please... join me in praying for his family, who found his body after he had been pleasuring himself with two wetsuits, rubber underwear, nylon rope, and an object inserted inside him.

Let us pray, also, for his shocked congregation that admired him as a Pastor, and looked up to him as a role model.

And please, pray for the loved ones attending his funeral, so that God might give them the strength to not giggle when they hear the words "loving husband," "honest," "hard-working," "his hobby," or "family man."

[Celtic (Quarantined)]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Please join me in prayers for Rev. Gary Aldridge, who was led astray by the homersexual deathstyle agenda.

And please... join me in praying for his family, who found his body after he had been pleasuring himself with two wetsuits, rubber underwear, nylon rope, and an object inserted inside him.

Let us pray, also, for his shocked congregation that admired him as a Pastor, and looked up to him as a role model.

And please, pray for the loved ones attending his funeral, so that God might give them the strength to not giggle when they hear the words "loving husband," "honest," "hard-working," "his hobby," or "family man."

Too...Funny...xD

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

I know we of Landover have spoken long and hard about the rubber industry. I hope Pastor Aldridge’s martyrdom at the hands of rubber gives secular society a mouthful about this menace and opened themselves up to some probing questions about it!

At lest Pastor Aldridge’s home state of Alabama forbids rubber. If it wasn’t for those liberals and their permissive DEATHsytles in those left coast states Pastor Aldridge would have never ended up hogtied and violated at his own hands.

[Talitha]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

I happen to know the Reverend very well and I think that this has all been blown out of proportion.
He just happened to be a keen Undersea photographer but had a very real fear of water. I'm sure the two wet suits were merely his attempt to keep out what he feared most, and the erm...... plastic device was merely there in case the wet suit sprang a leak and would have kept the water from entering his body.

..................Anyway, the ropes weren't all that tight.

[Pastor Al E Pistle]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Too...Funny...xD

Child, prayers are NOT FUNNY! They are a plea to GOD to change the physical laws of the universe for a specific purpose, such as to let some poor child who was mashed into a pancake by a bus, recover. But TRUE CHRISTIANS(TM) realize that if GOD hadn't wanted little Timmy mashed, HE wouldn't have mashed him.

Really, it makes no sense at all to wait until AFTER GOD does something and then ask Him to take it back like a bunch of whiny JOOS.

At Landover Baptist, we ask God to please not kill us today, and He usually doesn't. THAT is an example of effective prayer!

[Larry Lee]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Please join me in prayers for Rev. Gary Aldridge, who was led astray by the homersexual deathstyle agenda.

And please... join me in praying for his family, who found his body after he had been pleasuring himself with two wetsuits, rubber underwear, nylon rope, and an object inserted inside him.

You're a model True Christian(TM), Monty. But think about it. What should we have expected from a graduate of Liberty University, where even the founder himself (a Free Will Baptist by birth) enjoyed having intercourse with his own mother in the family outhouse? Free Will Baptist heresy runs deep -- across generations and even further, as we see here in the sad case of "Rev." Aldridge.

[Glendora Christianson]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Please join me in prayers for Rev. Gary Aldridge, who was led astray by the homersexual deathstyle agenda.

And please... join me in praying for his family, who found his body after he had been pleasuring himself with two wetsuits, rubber underwear, nylon rope, and an object inserted inside him.

Assuming Mr Aldbridge was a Republican as well as a real good Christian, I might give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he was dressed in protective clothing so that he could spray some home pest control product made by Ortho. If you actually read the directions, I do believe it says to protect your entire body (including orifices) against exposure. anyway, it's just an idea, but my "tap three times on the bathroom floor if you love Jesus" idea worked pretty well on Mrs. Senator Craig, so why not?

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Assuming Mr Aldbridge was a Republican as well as a real good Christian, I might give him the benefit of the doubt and assume he was dressed in protective clothing so that he could spray some home pest control product made by Ortho. If you actually read the directions, I do believe it says to protect your entire body (including orifices) against exposure. anyway, it's just an idea, but my "tap three times on the bathroom floor if you love Jesus" idea worked pretty well on Mrs. Senator Craig, so why not?

Because

it's s t r e t c h i n g credibility too far.


-The guy was a faking phreakazoid.

-I bet he's making satan sick to his stomach.

-Have never read of a more vile, disgusting, filthy, laughable, terrible, terminal fix of repulsively sacked slime-ola.

-Our membership grows while those sinners he typified and taught slip successively into the Fire.

-Therefore it's all good after all.

-But, damn, that was one nasty pervert-poseur.

-I will stop now because the bandwidth-staircase to Heaven is already a mile wide.

-RIP "Reverend" Gary. Rip harder; you might just catch a breath ere long.

-Prolly not.

-Double neoprene is especially toasty in liquified sulfur forever.

[eliot mayfield]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

I happen to know the Reverend very well and I think that this has all been blown out of proportion.
He just happened to be a keen Undersea photographer but had a very real fear of water. I'm sure the two wet suits were merely his attempt to keep out what he feared most, and the erm...... plastic device was merely there in case the wet suit sprang a leak and would have kept the water from entering his body.

..................Anyway, the ropes weren't all that tight.

Exactly. He may have been planning a trip to the amazon.

http://www.angelfire.com/mo2/animals1/catfish/candiru.html

[Talitha]

Re: Pray for Rev. Gary Aldridge

Exactly. He may have been planning a trip to the amazon.

http://www.angelfire.com/mo2/animals...h/candiru.html

Precisely my point Brother Mayfield.

God must REALLY hate South Americans to create a creature that could easily wriggle It's way into the smallest nook or cranny to suck from It's Host.

It's no wonder this poor man took such extreme precautions.

Wouldn't you???