[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

I think I know why The Lord made those flesh bacteria eat her hands, leg, and foot off. Just look at her, she used to dress like a total whore!

Now, I'm not saying we shouldn't pray for her, we totally should, but I think we also need to pray that she got God's message.

I never thought of it that way, Brother Captain Portway. Surely she did not find the LORD's favor, dressing like a wanton hussy. Maybe, just maybe, her experience will be the wake-up call Americans need to recognize that time is short and any day Jesus will come. (2 Peter 3:10) Living their lives to suit the desires of society will only last so long. Aimee is living proof that at any time the LORD can take away all our creature comforts, as is His divine and perfect right.

Here, I'll get us started:


Lord, we ask that you not only make Aimee Copeland's hands, leg, and foot grow back, but that You reach into her slutty heart and turn her into a modest and chaste young lady, so that You won't have to mercifully smite her yet again for offending You. I ask this knowing she probably doesn't deserve it, but since she has touched the hearts of several True Christians™, we figured You could do us a solid on this one, being that we are Your chosen people and all. In Your Holy name I pray, amen.

Amen!

[Jedediah]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

All things are possible through Christ (Philippians 4:13), and I have personally witnessed my fair share of signs and wonders, including spontaneous regeneration of amputated limbs. I know what I saw. Such things are not without precedent.

However, this young lady is promiscuous, shows no indication of having accepted Christ as her personal LORD and Savior, and was smote by God specifically to serve as a warning for others, lest dressing like a slut become even more prevalent in the society of the Godless. If she wants Jesus to heal her stumps, she's got a lot of grovelling ahead of her.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

If God™ doesn't make her limbs grow back, I hope He™ calls her home soon.....or she just has the good grace to DIE.

How can she keep a home, or do a family's cooking if she doesn't have any hands, and just one foot? I mean excuse me, but she BARELY HAS A LEG TO STAND ON.

What husband should have to put up with that?
.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

There was no mention of it (probably out of common decency) but seeing the girl was such a slut, I bet she had to have her cooter removed too.

Never the less, I'll pray for the whore. Even degenerate prostitutes deserve a chance at redemption. I hope they take a ten pictures a day of her uncovered stumps and make it into a movie showing the all encompassing power of Jesus healing her. It would be about 150,000 frames. So that would be a movie spanning 41 years. I bet Lifetime would pick up the rights.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

I have reason to suspect Aimee had it coming, and for a good Biblically supported reason.

I find myself in agreement with my esteemed colleague, brother Portway. She dressed too slutty back in her days.

Atleast now she has been humbled, and will live the rest of her life as a pathetic cripple. You have been warned, Christ deniers.

Brother Johnathan could be right, maybe God is just making an example of the girl. I mean, he killed Lot's wife just for turning and taking a peek at His handiwork.

I'm starting to sense that we aren't of one mind on this Aimee person. I mean, if y'all are going to pray for her, I'm on board. But if she is just a whore that's been punished by God, then she really doesn't deserve our prayers.

I'm no Pastor, so I'll do what y'all decide. I'd hate to pray for someone who didn't deserve it though.

[Johnathan]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

I have reason to suspect Aimee had it coming, and for a good Biblically supported reason.

I find myself in agreement with my esteemed colleague, brother Portway. She dressed too slutty back in her days.

Atleast now she has been humbled, and will live the rest of her life as a pathetic cripple. You have been warned, Christ deniers.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Let's all pray for God to heal Aimee's stump hands.

I think I know why The Lord made those flesh bacteria eat her hands, leg, and foot off. Just look at her, she used to dress like a total whore!

Now, I'm not saying we shouldn't pray for her, we totally should, but I think we also need to pray that she got God's message. Here, I'll get us started:


Lord, we ask that you not only make Aimee Copeland's hands, leg, and foot grow back, but that You reach into her slutty heart and turn her into a modest and chaste young lady, so that You won't have to mercifully smite her yet again for offending You. I ask this knowing she probably doesn't deserve it, but since she has touched the hearts of several True Christians™, we figured You could do us a solid on this one, being that we are Your chosen people and all. In Your Holy name I pray, amen.

[Mistress Cookie]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

I wonder why she hasn't asked God to be healed yet. Perhaps she has more important things to pray about right now. That's okay, God will be there to heal her when having arms and legs reaches the top of her to-do list.

From the first picture, it looks like she didn't pray very hard to be relieved from the mote/beam in her eye; She wears eyeglasses.

Maybe God™ was trying to get her attention with the eyes, and she went on with her reckless "You're-Not-the-Boss-of-Me-I-Can-Do-It-All-Myself" life, and he's just now bringing in the "big guns" to go after her little limbs?

Matthew 7:3-5 / And why beholdest thou the mote that is in thy brother's eye, but considerest not the beam that is in thine own eye? / Or how wilt thou say to thy brother, Let me pull out the mote out of thine eye; and, behold, a beam is in thine own eye? / Thou hypocrite, first cast out the beam out of thine own eye; and then shalt thou see clearly to cast out the mote out of thy brother's eye.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

I wonder if our prayers have helped to heal Aimee yet...

By now she ought to be feeling some sensations of impending regrowth.

All I know is I am praising the LORD Jesus even now!

\o/

[Redeemed Papist]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

Maybe the best thing to do would be to gather a group of True Christians™ together, and have them all spit on Aimee together?

Better yet, we could make it a fundraiser. Loogeys for Aimee! People could make a contribution for the honor of watching the spittling, either live or on pay-per-view. We could use the money to pay for the filming and future distribution of the DVD of the miracle.

I wonder if our prayers have helped to heal Aimee yet...

By now she ought to be feeling some sensations of impending regrowth.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

Excellent point, Sister Angelie. Jesus's spittle has remarkable restorative properties. It can even make the blind see!

And he took the blind man by the hand, and led him out of the town; and when he had spit on his eyes, and put his hands upon him, he asked him if he saw ought. And he looked up, and said, I see men as trees, walking. After that he put his hands again upon his eyes, and made him look up: and he was restored, and saw every man clearly. Mark 8:23-25

Next time I see a blind person, I'll spit on his eyes and see whether it requires Jesus's spittle or whether spittle from an ordinary True Christian™ will suffice.

Maybe the best thing to do would be to gather a group of True Christians™ together, and have them all spit on Aimee together?

Better yet, we could make it a fundraiser. Loogeys for Aimee! People could make a contribution for the honor of watching the spittling, either live or on pay-per-view. We could use the money to pay for the filming and future distribution of the DVD of the miracle.

[Ezekiel Bathfire]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

Next time I see a blind person, I'll spit on his eyes and see whether it requires Jesus's spittle or whether spittle from an ordinary True Christian™ will suffice.

Most interesting! Do report back with as many details possible.

[WWJDnow]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

I think we should try that. Perhaps we could make little hands for her out of spit clay. John 9:6-7 That probably won't work, come to think of it. It probably needs to be Jesus' spit. I don't think we have any of that, do we?

Excellent point, Sister Angelie. Jesus's spittle has remarkable restorative properties. It can even make the blind see!

And he took the blind man by the hand, and led him out of the town; and when he had spit on his eyes, and put his hands upon him, he asked him if he saw ought. And he looked up, and said, I see men as trees, walking. After that he put his hands again upon his eyes, and made him look up: and he was restored, and saw every man clearly. Mark 8:23-25

Next time I see a blind person, I'll spit on his eyes and see whether it requires Jesus's spittle or whether spittle from an ordinary True Christian(TM) will suffice.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

Well, I'm hoping they get to asking Jesus to grow her arms and legs back soon because I'm tired of looking at her as she is now. She's like some ugly partially disassembled Mrs. Potatohead.



YiC,

Zech

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Let's all pray for Aimee

I think we should try that. Perhaps we could make little hands for her out of spit clay. John 9:6-7 That probably won't work, come to think of it. It probably needs to be Jesus' spit. I don't think we have any of that, do we?

I've got a bucket of it, but I'm saving it for something.