[eliot mayfield]

Re: Mustache Rides and You

I think you got that confused with the urethra. That's not in the same place as the vagina.

Yes, you are correct. There is no Urethra in Virgina, or even West Virgina to the best of my knowledge. However you may have in your excitement made a typo. Perhaps typing when your right hand is busy and only using your left causes too many mistakes?
There is however a Eureka in Nevada, Utah, and even California. That's probably what you meant.

Men, in my days as a booze hound and a skirt chaser and a pervert, I had many cooter encounters, sometimes as much as 4 a year!
Yet, even in that state of filth and degeneracy, I never encountered a "Red Snapper". The Lord God was looking after me. He has other plans for my thingy. No teeth were there to bite it off.

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

It can be difficult to have a mature conversation on these holy forums. Cooter mushrooms are serious business. I wish the Unsaved© would realize that.

I can understand the mushrooms and all the other things you mentioned Brother Hatchet. I myself have encountered them. One of the things that have not been discussed in this thread is the matter of yeast. Now I have encountered constant complaints of yeast from women. The stories in the Bible (KJV1611) about unleavened bread have always puzzled me. If the women always had yeast readily available why was it that they had to make bread without it?

I have also heard stories about cheese in cooters, but it never made much sense. The milk to make cheese comes from somewhere else, unless there is a property of cooters that I am unaware of.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

I'm going to report your racism to the Japan-America Society.

What does a gook commuinist organization have to do with the topic at hand? Keep derailing threads and you'll get banned.

[Dwayne DeKalb]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

What does a gook commuinist organization have to do with the topic at hand? Keep derailing threads and you'll get banned.

Excuse me but a person of Asian heritage posted a picture of himself wearing a mustache and he was ridiculed so I came to his defense. I didn't just post something random, I responded appropriately to other posts within this thread. You need to read more closely before making serious threats like that. Also the Japan-America Society is a wonderful organization that promotes understanding and tolerance between Japan and America. I urge you to become a member, it will really open your eyes.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Excuse me but a person of Asian heritage posted a picture of himself wearing a mustache and he was ridiculed so I came to his defense. I didn't just post something random, I responded appropriately to other posts within this thread. You need to read more closely before making serious threats like that. Also the Japan-America Society is a wonderful organization that promotes understanding and tolerance between Japan and America. I urge you to become a member, it will really open your eyes.

Hey pal, my eyes are open, because Jesus made them that way. It's the slants who need their eyes opened.

[Dr. Ernest C. Ville, D.C.S.]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Excuse me but a person of Asian heritage posted a picture of himself wearing a mustache and he was ridiculed so I came to his defense.

Wow, we have our own little Don Juan here, don't we. Well, Mr. DickBob, what racist opinion are you going to burden us with here? This little chink has been a barb in our side for far too long. We've treated him with nothing but Godly respect and tried to lead him to the Light but he has defeated us at every turn. He came here to mock us with his photoshops, but such images are amusing to no one here.

I didn't just post something random, I responded appropriately to other posts within this thread. You need to read more closely before making serious threats like that. Also the Japan-America Society is a wonderful organization that promotes understanding and tolerance between Japan and America. I urge you to become a member, it will really open your eyes.

Tolerance between Japan and America? Maybe *you* want to tolerate them, but ever since Pearl Harbor, I've been a little suspicious of the little slants. You can never see what they're thinking because their eyes are suspiciously hidden. I bet you want to have a Terrorist-America alliance too, don't you? I'm curious as to why you seem so ready to open America up for another terrorist attack. I think I need to call my friend Lance over at the Department of Faith for an investigatory report on your background...

[Bob4God]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Excuse me but a person of Asian heritage posted a picture of himself wearing a mustache and he was ridiculed so I came to his defense. I didn't just post something random, I responded appropriately to other posts within this thread. You need to read more closely before making serious threats like that. Also the Japan-America Society is a wonderful organization that promotes understanding and tolerance between Japan and America. I urge you to become a member, it will really open your eyes.

Oh, so you think Asians can do no wrong then??? What if he posted naked pictures of himself smearing feces all over his yellow chest? Are we just supposed to TOLERATE that because he's ASIAN???

What if he were a decent white man? Would you defend him then?

I urge YOU to become a member of CHRIST's chosen church, and tithe to Him to make up for all the hurt you've caused.

Have you gotten around to REPORTING me yet? What'd they say?

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

What if he posted naked pictures of himself smearing feces all over his yellow chest?

The despicable monkey practically did that in my birthday thread.

[SayvedByTheLord]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

The Unsaved© harvest them to put on their pizzas Brother Hatchet. There is no helping them.

YIC

It can be difficult to have a mature conversation on these holy forums. Cooter mushrooms are serious business. I wish the Unsaved© would realize that.

[Melbran]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Well in that case....no BJ'S either!!!!!!!! It's only fair

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Well in that case....no BJ'S either!!!!!!!! It's only fair

What are you talking about? What are these "BJ'S"? And three exclamation points should be sufficient for emphasis.

[Melbran]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

What are you talking about? What are these "BJ'S"? And three exclamation points should be sufficient for emphasis.

Aaron, once again, you are ugly. Please don't talk.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

Aaron, once again, you are ugly. Please don't talk.

Excuse me?

I'd just like to make sure you said what I thought you said.

Yep, there it is.

Listen you little creep, you come into OUR forum and start insulting us, that is too much!

Do I go to where you work and tell you how service men for money?

You're on a short road to getting banned! So keep it up!

[Old Man Hatchet]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

While further researching the revolting subject of cunnilingus, I discovered the exercises listed below. Apparently cunnilingus is quite tiring, and one needs to build up stamina. While I certainly do not condone "yodeling in the gully," I believe these exercises are useful in strengthening the tongue for extended periods of proselytizing. I urge all Landover men to perform these exercises daily so we are fully prepared to teach God's Word to others.

Exercise 1:
Stick your tongue as far out of your mouth as possible, and then try to touch your nose. Once you are in this position, hold the same muscle groups still and begin moving your tongue around. Practice in sets, moving the tongue clockwise, counterclockwise, and up and down.

Exercise 2:
With a loose jaw, point your tongue while simultaneously trying to keep your tongue in constant contact with the top and bottom your mouth. Once you are in this position, practice moving your tongue in and out of your mouth. For the more advanced student, try keeping your mouth closed and circling your tongue around inside of it, while of course, maintaining position. An extension to the advanced exercise is trying to dissolve a lifesaver held in your teeth from the inside out.

Exercise 3:
Stick your tongue straight out of your mouth, trying to keep your tongue flat and relaxed. Slowly, while holding the position, practice curling the wide tip of the tongue upward, downward and side-to-side. Practice in five sets of ten, holding each move for 2 seconds.

Exercise 4:
Keep your tongue relaxed and open your mouth. Move your tongue in and out of your mouth forwards and in both directions. Practice in five sets of twenty.

[Dr. Zaius]

Re: Mustache Rides and You (MEN OF FAITH ONLY!!!!!!!!)

The last thing I need is some stinky tuna salad stuck in my mustache all day long.