MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

[Bob4God]

I am absolutely enraged at secular science right now.

I saw a headline in the Google while performing a completely innocent search about something called "Testicle Self-Exam," or "TSE" for short.

Naturally, I became livid and shut my computer off and turned it back on to get that filth off my screen.

But the question remains... WHAT is it?

As far as I can tell, the next big hoax in evolution "science" is that schools are teaching our kids that their privates can examine themselves!

Imagine such nonsense!

[Jedediah]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

It's just an excuse secular "scientists" use to coerce young men into masturbation. Tricks like this are why I don't take my boys don't go to the secular doctor when they get sick. If it's not something that prayer, a visit from the Pastor, and a laying-on-of-hands can't handle, then it's just their time. Better that than getting tricked into onanism and forfeiting their souls...

[WilliamJenningsBryan]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

Frankly, it sounds like something the cathylicks might do (maybe somewhere in their church liturgy or in one of those popish encyclicals) – just saying.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

Next the liberals will demand that we fluff up a friend's tallywacker, throw some lube on it, and use it as a speculum to perform prostate exams. It sends shivers of disgust up and down my spine imagining what it would feel like to have another man's erect member sliding in and out of my rectum. I imagine it would drive me completely insane.

[HTannor]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

Amen, Brother Billy Bob!

The thought of an erect member slowly sliding in and out of your rectum is driving me completely insane.

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

Amen, Brother Billy Bob!

The thought of an erect member slowly sliding in and out of your rectum is driving me completely insane.

As it should, brother. As it should.

Anal sex is truly the most disgusting and unnatural activity that Satan ever conceived. Just the words, "anal sex", create a great deal of tension in my neck and shoulders, not to mention my rectum, which ever braces against any attempt at penetration.

[diablo666]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

Amen, Brother Billy Bob!

The thought of my erect member slowly sliding in and out of your rectum is driving me completely insane.

that is the gayest thing i've ever heard.

[Isaac Fisher]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

that is the gayest thing i've ever heard.

What are you insinuating?

[Trent Harvey, Jr.]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

I've preformed a testicle self-inquizition.

I asked them if they'd ever though about non-procrative sex acts (aka perversion). The Holy Spirit told me they said no, so I put the pair of scissors away.

[diablo666]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

HTannor is insinuating that he is a booty pirate. As i recall, it is a sin to have homosexual thoughts such as that.

[LordHaveMercy]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

I will never touch any part of me below the belt line without first praying for forgiveness for a few hours, and then only with heavy gloves on.

At our Church, the Pastor is the only one freely allowed to touch anyone's testicles or other parts. Our health is a gift, so some of us have him give us exams prety often. Hallelujah!

[JoshuaBlackmaster]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

I believe this is a liberal trick to get true believers to touch themselves. It is most wicked as they use the guise of health. Do not fall to this trickery my brothers. If you suspect something down there, ask your pastor for advice.

[Clamper13]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

I'm no doctor, but I'll posit that another man's penis can be called a tool, one that might be effective for anal examinations.

It has greater length and sensitivity than a finger, and properly worked could plumb the depths of the suffering patient and definitively ascertain the source of his suffering.

The examination should not be taken lightly, and not be deemed complete unless every crevasse of the affected persons nether region is thoroughly probed. The examiner should follow a rigid protocol established by upstanding members of the Church.

The examiner should receive regular training with young healthy subjects. This will establish a baseline for the trainee and teach him difference between healthy and unhealthy areas.

The patient should be tightly bound as to not interrupt or thwart the examination. As to not raise interest in any interlopers, he should be gagged as well, unless a simultaneous oral exam is needed.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

It's just a fancy excuse people use to masturbate. Which is the same as raping Jesus in his holy hole. God does not approve!

Genesis 38:9-10 "And Onan knew that the seed should not be his; and it came to pass, when he went in unto his brother's wife, that he spilled it on the ground, lest that he should give seed to his brother. And the thing which he did displeased the LORD: wherefore he slew him also."

[Proud Faroese]

Re: MEN ONLY: What is a Testicle Self-Exam?

that is the gayest thing i've ever heard.

Are you accusing Billy Bob for being gay? You should know that this Christian manly man HATES anal sex, do you actually think he is gay or do you just think you are funny? Is it your twisted sense of humour to make fun of something that someone else truly hates?