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Since Negroes ruined the great sport of boxing, American males have looked elsewhere to satisfy their God-given bloodlust. A popular alternative is MMA—Mixed Martial Arts—which has elements of boxing and wrestling as well as other fighting styles and which is now advertised everywhere from blimps to candy wrappers. But what is it really? Nothing more than gay sex with a sadomasochistic edge. MMA should stand for Many Mangled Anuses.
Like gay porn studios, MMA leagues are organized by weight. Heavyweight fights feature burly bears, daddies, and muscle studs; middleweights are your typical jocks, while the lower divisions are dominated by skinny twinks. No matter where his tastes may run, a young man struggling with same-sex urges will find something on the card to stir his tallywhacker.
Fights are hyped at press events in the weeks leading up to a show. The brawlers make Youtube movies full of thinly-veiled innuendos, promising to own their opponents' asses and rip them open. On the day before, there is a weigh-in, where they appear in their underwear so everyone can slobber over their muscles. It is common at such events for fighters to kiss and rub oil on each other.
Each bout begins with a "feeling-out process" where the men flit around and shoot burning looks of lust across the ring. They may punch and kick—but because MMA fighters are terrible boxers, it looks more like two Chelsea queens slapping each other after Kris spilled appletini on Enrique's purse.
The shorts say it all.
Once a fight goes to the ground, it becomes indistinguishable from sodomy. Announcers talk excitedly about the mount, who's on top and bottom, how hard they are, and how the performers will look for openings, stuff each other, and eventually finish. A popular move is the rear naked choke, in which one fighter strangles the other while thrusting into his backside, simulating the dangerous asphyxiative practices that homos use to make anal sex less painful. Another is the triangle. I hate to be crude here, but it's literally a blowjob.
MMA has its roots in the ancient Greek pankration, whose practitioners fought nude and buggered away in frenzied orgies between rounds, and took its present-day form in Japan, the most perverted nation on Earth. While there are openly gay fighters and a few shemales, the majority live in a hilariously transparent closet. Fans with an IQ higher than their shoe size—about 40%—know this, yet will fly into a rage at any mention of their sport's homoeroticism. All of the women in MMA are lesbians. Even performers who aren't gay are at risk for catching AIDS, as an MMA fight is an extremely bloody affair.
Here are some more reasons not to watch this garbage:
It's fake. The fights are choreographed and the outcomes predetermined, making it no different from WWE wrestling. Telltale signs are when a fighter is "knocked out" by the wimpiest blow or submits without struggle as soon as an opponent starts pulling his arm. Laughable.
It's racist. While not as bad as boxing, MMA leagues teem with blacks, Mexicans, and even black Mexicans, promoting the myth that white people are athletically inferior to muds. The most popular white performer is Georges St-Pierre, a French guy—so he barely counts.
It's Satanic. Among the styles being "mixed" are Eastern disciplines like karate and judo, which are based in Buddhism. Fighters who train in these dark arts invite demons to enter and possess them. Many fans are inspired to try martial arts themselves, leading to their spiritual downfall.
It's un-Biblical. Mixed martial artists are covered in tattoos, some to the extent that they are no longer recognizable as human. God clearly bans tattoos in Leviticus 19:28. He also hates pride and arrogance, yet MMA trash talk consists of nothing else.
It's expensive. An Ultimate Fighting pay per view costs $70. Why not spend the money on a beautiful Kinkade lampshade instead?
Like gay porn studios, MMA leagues are organized by weight. Heavyweight fights feature burly bears, daddies, and muscle studs; middleweights are your typical jocks, while the lower divisions are dominated by skinny twinks. No matter where his tastes may run, a young man struggling with same-sex urges will find something on the card to stir his tallywhacker.
Fights are hyped at press events in the weeks leading up to a show. The brawlers make Youtube movies full of thinly-veiled innuendos, promising to own their opponents' asses and rip them open. On the day before, there is a weigh-in, where they appear in their underwear so everyone can slobber over their muscles. It is common at such events for fighters to kiss and rub oil on each other.
Each bout begins with a "feeling-out process" where the men flit around and shoot burning looks of lust across the ring. They may punch and kick—but because MMA fighters are terrible boxers, it looks more like two Chelsea queens slapping each other after Kris spilled appletini on Enrique's purse.
The shorts say it all.
Once a fight goes to the ground, it becomes indistinguishable from sodomy. Announcers talk excitedly about the mount, who's on top and bottom, how hard they are, and how the performers will look for openings, stuff each other, and eventually finish. A popular move is the rear naked choke, in which one fighter strangles the other while thrusting into his backside, simulating the dangerous asphyxiative practices that homos use to make anal sex less painful. Another is the triangle. I hate to be crude here, but it's literally a blowjob.
MMA has its roots in the ancient Greek pankration, whose practitioners fought nude and buggered away in frenzied orgies between rounds, and took its present-day form in Japan, the most perverted nation on Earth. While there are openly gay fighters and a few shemales, the majority live in a hilariously transparent closet. Fans with an IQ higher than their shoe size—about 40%—know this, yet will fly into a rage at any mention of their sport's homoeroticism. All of the women in MMA are lesbians. Even performers who aren't gay are at risk for catching AIDS, as an MMA fight is an extremely bloody affair.
Here are some more reasons not to watch this garbage:
It's fake. The fights are choreographed and the outcomes predetermined, making it no different from WWE wrestling. Telltale signs are when a fighter is "knocked out" by the wimpiest blow or submits without struggle as soon as an opponent starts pulling his arm. Laughable.
It's racist. While not as bad as boxing, MMA leagues teem with blacks, Mexicans, and even black Mexicans, promoting the myth that white people are athletically inferior to muds. The most popular white performer is Georges St-Pierre, a French guy—so he barely counts.
It's Satanic. Among the styles being "mixed" are Eastern disciplines like karate and judo, which are based in Buddhism. Fighters who train in these dark arts invite demons to enter and possess them. Many fans are inspired to try martial arts themselves, leading to their spiritual downfall.
It's un-Biblical. Mixed martial artists are covered in tattoos, some to the extent that they are no longer recognizable as human. God clearly bans tattoos in Leviticus 19:28. He also hates pride and arrogance, yet MMA trash talk consists of nothing else.
It's expensive. An Ultimate Fighting pay per view costs $70. Why not spend the money on a beautiful Kinkade lampshade instead?
Hail Satin
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