Help... scared I might be a homer D:

[melatonin4000]

hello.. welcome to everyone here

I am scared that i might be a homosexual.. i have been a good Christian all my life but lately my friends have been .. closer to me physically and a bit soppier... it terrifies me to think i could be gay and they could be too!

i think this was one of the reasons for my short bout of extreme depression and suicidal.. what can i do to be 100% straight?

[Nobar King]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

Stop hanging around those homers, for one thing.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

hello.. welcome to everyone here

I am scared that i might be a homosexual.. i have been a good Christian all my life but lately my friends have been .. closer to me physically and a bit soppier... it terrifies me to think i could be gay and they could be too!

i think this was one of the reasons for my short bout of extreme depression and suicidal.. what can i do to be 100% straight?

First, son, get a grip on yourself! Stop fantasizing about your friends wanting to molest you!

Second, bear in mind the words of the Lord.

Matthew 5:

29 And if thy right eye offend thee, pluck it out, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

30 And if thy right hand offend thee, cut it off, and cast it from thee: for it is profitable for thee that one of thy members should perish, and not that thy whole body should be cast into hell.

That's right, friend. It's better that your member perish, than you go to Hell! Which would you prefer?

[melatonin4000]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

That's right, friend. It's better that your member perish, than you go to Hell! Which would you prefer?

I don't want to cut off my privates because I want a family - but I'm definitely not going to be with those friends again.


If I'm away from them I won't be worried of them. Hopefully that will stop me being insecure..

Anyway, thanks for your help, I'm definitely not going to be even remotely sexual until I have children with whoever my future wife will be - I feel it's the closest to my member "perishing" without me not being able to use it legitimately later.

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

I don't want to cut off my privates because I want a family - but I'm definitely not going to be with those friends again.


If I'm away from them I won't be worried of them. Hopefully that will stop me being insecure..

Anyway, thanks for your help, I'm definitely not going to be even remotely sexual until I have children with whoever my future wife will be - I feel it's the closest to my member "perishing" without me not being able to use it legitimately later.

You aren't married yet? It does sound like you are gay.

[melatonin4000]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

You aren't married yet? It does sound like you are gay.

Wut?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

Wut?

And you are from England.

This is pretty much cased closed for you being a homer.

[James Hutchins]

Re: Help... scared I might be a homer D:

Yup, it does look like this fellow belongs on a bus of footballers.