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  • GothWitch
    Unsaved trash
    Under Investigation
    • Jun 2007
    • 3

    #1

    A humble question

    I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

    Praise!
  • Bobby-Joe
    Landover Security Superviser
    Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
    NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
    True Christian™
    • Sep 2006
    • 18405

    #2
    Re: A humble question

    Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
    I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

    Praise!
    Friend,

    Perhaps instead of mocking God you should consider your own immortal soul. Jesus certainly can make a hot sauce to hot for your to handle and how to avoid it is the question you should be asking.

    Frankly friend I disgusted you would chose Landover as a venue to ridicule Jesus.

    Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

    Hot Must ReadThreads!


    Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

    Comment

    • Talitha
      Deaconess
      Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
      True Christian™
      • Jan 2026
      • 15118

      #3
      Re: A humble question

      Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
      I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

      Praise!
      Heathens like you seem to think they can become True Christian™ as though it is some sort of Private Club for which you just fill out a Membership form..
      Let me tell you, we are all hand-picked by Jesus Christ to look after HIS Forum.
      Mockers will end up with an Eternity in Hell.

      Sister Talitha

      Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


      HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
      being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



      Comment

      • Daisy Mae Johnson
        The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
        Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
        aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
        True Christian™
        • Sep 2006
        • 15708

        #4
        Re: A humble question

        Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
        I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

        Praise!
        Son, it's time to stop thinking about munching scalding hot tacos and start thinking about JESUS and Eternal Salvation.

        If you don't, you will soon find yourself smothered in Satan's and his minions scalding "hot sauce" while they take turns wildly raping you in hot, sweaty, unending orgies of depravity.

        Lve, Sister Thumper
        Last edited by Daisy Mae Johnson; 07-02-2007, 08:31 PM.
        sigpic

        Tweet me Here
        My GODLY Bio Here

        Comment

        • GothWitch
          Unsaved trash
          Under Investigation
          • Jun 2007
          • 3

          #5
          Re: A humble question

          Thank you for your kind replies.

          I did not intend to mock God in any way, but would you, in your infinite kindness help me find the true faith? I can not find peace with this question ravaging my mind.

          Comment

          • Talitha
            Deaconess
            Gracious, genteel, kind, tender, and warm True Christian™ Sister
            True Christian™
            • Jan 2026
            • 15118

            #6
            Re: A humble question

            Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
            Thank you for your kind replies.

            I did not intend to mock God in any way, but would you, in your infinite kindness help me find the true faith? I can not find peace with this question ravaging my mind.
            Well, instead of asking silly questions, you should go immediately to the Introduction Forum, tell us about yourself and let us know your favourite Bible Passage.
            Being a Goth Witch will not help you find The Truth® you seek.

            Sister Talitha

            Markswoman, Circumcisionist, Platinum Tither.


            HE took the damsel by the hand, and said unto her, Talitha Cumi; which is,
            being interpreted, Damsel, I say unto thee, arise!...Mark 5:41



            Comment

            • Bobby-Joe
              Landover Security Superviser
              Asset Loss Prevention and Personal Security Expert
              NOT angry and positively NOT Gay
              True Christian™
              • Sep 2006
              • 18405

              #7
              Re: A humble question

              Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
              Thank you for your kind replies.

              I did not intend to mock God in any way, but would you, in your infinite kindness help me find the true faith? I can not find peace with this question ravaging my mind.
              There is your problem friend. You are using your mind. Remember as a Christian always to just listen, don't think.

              Time to reclaim our FREEDOM from the “Mullah in Chief” and his growing activist voter hoards of socialists, communists, anti-Semites, anti-Christians, atheists, radical gays and lesbians, feminists, illegal immigrants, Muslims, anti-Anglo whites and others.

              Hot Must ReadThreads!


              Time to come clean on Benghazi Mr Obama!

              Comment

              • Pastor Ezekiel
                Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                 
                • Sep 2006
                • 78555

                #8
                Re: A humble question

                Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
                Thank you for your kind replies.

                I did not intend to mock God in any way, but would you, in your infinite kindness help me find the true faith? I can not find peace with this question ravaging my mind.
                Of course you meant to mock. Do you take us for fools? Your very name mocks God. You can never find peace as a gothtard satan worshiper. Repent and accept Jesus now. Swallow Him whole and He'll give you the peace that we all enjoy! Spit Him out and you'll find yourself gargling satanic bile for all eternity.

                It's your choice, heathen.
                Who Will Jesus Damn?

                Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment

                • Rachael Van Helsing
                  HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                  • Sep 2006
                  • 5131

                  #9
                  Re: A humble question

                  Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
                  I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks..*snip*
                  Give these people some credit. You want to join their ranks, yet call yourself 'gothwitch'?
                  Whatever else these people are, they aren't illiterate.

                  Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde
                  hot, sweaty, unending orgies of depravity.
                  That isn't exactly a turnoff, you know.
                  Last edited by Rachael Van Helsing; 07-03-2007, 12:03 AM.
                  sigpic
                  Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                  Comment

                  • Daisy Mae Johnson
                    The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
                    Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
                    aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
                    True Christian™
                    • Sep 2006
                    • 15708

                    #10
                    Re: A humble question

                    Originally posted by Rachael Van Helsing View Post
                    Give these people some credit. You want to join their ranks, yet call yourself 'gothwitch'?
                    Whatever else these people are, they aren't illiterate.


                    That isn't exactly a turnoff, you know.

                    Rachael Renee Van Hellbound!! Stop encouraging sin! These poor young, lost, misguided souls are looking for Salvation. Not more ways to be sent to Hell.

                    Keep your twisted witch sex orgies fantasies to yourself! The last thing we need to think about is a coven of witches, naked, and drunk with unknown toxins, writhing around a cauldron grinding on each other and moaning in ecstasy and Satanic prayers.

                    Shame on you!

                    Stern, Sister Thumper
                    sigpic

                    Tweet me Here
                    My GODLY Bio Here

                    Comment

                    • Rachael Van Helsing
                      HEATHEN — Suspected Witch
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 5131

                      #11
                      Re: A humble question

                      Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
                      Rachael Renee Van Hellbound!! Stop encouraging sin! These poor young, lost, misguided souls are looking for Salvation. Not more ways to be sent to Hell.
                      How did you know my middle name? Let me guess.....DOF file? Anyway....hmph! I was actually standing up for you folk, telling her not to take you for fools, and this is the thanks I get!

                      Keep your twisted witch sex orgies fantasies to yourself! The last thing we need to think about is a coven of witches, naked, and drunk with unknown toxins, writhing around a cauldron grinding on each other and moaning in ecstasy and Satanic prayers.
                      Well actually, I wasn't thinking in quite those terms, but now that you mention it...

                      Shame on you!

                      Stern, Sister Thumper
                      Shame on me?? It wasn't me who brought up writhing, sweaty orgies, now, was it?
                      sigpic
                      Wake up and smell the 21st Century!!

                      Comment

                      • Sister of Sacred Suffering
                        Wriggling her way free of the demonic grasp of Ratzinger
                        Forum Member
                        • Jun 2007
                        • 41

                        #12
                        Re: A humble question

                        Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
                        I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

                        Praise!
                        While your question is trivial and simplistic there is something to be said for the connotation of heat. This is where your mind SHOULD be! Fire and brimstone awaits you witch! You are going to burn in hell for all eternity if you do not become a God fearing Christian.
                        sigpic

                        Comment

                        • angelique_of_the_damned44
                          Unsaved trash
                           
                          • Jun 2007
                          • 48

                          #13
                          Re: A humble question

                          Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
                          I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

                          Praise!
                          That reminds me of an episode of the Simpsons where Homer gets completely stoned (in the hippie way) and asks the Ned Flanders (the friendly, bible-thumpin', always at the front of the line for church) a similar question. And Ned goes on to read the entire bible to Homer, who is in aww at the whole thing (but only because he was still stoned).
                          I thought it was hilarious!
                          The Lord is my shepherd: I shall not want.

                          Comment

                          • Sister Noddy
                            True Christian™
                            True Christian™
                            • Jun 2007
                            • 1843

                            #14
                            Re: A humble question

                            Originally posted by GothWitch View Post

                            I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

                            Praise!
                            Hello there, GothWitch ... my advice is, don't tell them who you are, and don't mock Jesus, you will never get out of the unsaved trash user group if you do ...

                            ... unless you are a True Christian for real --- but the pastors here want confirmation of that from Jesus first
                            1st Timothy 2: 9 In like manner also, that women adorn themselves in modest apparel, with shamefacedness and sobriety; not with broided hair, or gold, or pearls, or costly array;
                            1st Timothy 2: 10 But (which becometh women professing godliness) with good works ...


                            1 Timothy 5: 16 If any man or woman that believeth have widows, let them relieve them, and let not the church be charged; that it may relieve them that are widows indeed ...

                            Proverbs 31: 26 She openeth her mouth with wisdom; and in her tongue is the law of kindness ...
                            Proverbs 31: 27 She looketh well to the ways of her household, and eateth not the bread of idleness ...

                            Comment

                            • Unsaved and Loving It
                              Unsaved Trash, Foul Worthless Garbage Hellbound Sinner
                              Forum Member
                              • Jun 2007
                              • 308

                              #15
                              Re: A humble question

                              Originally posted by GothWitch View Post
                              I have long been wishing to join your noble ranks, but one thing has stopped me... One thing has made me wonder. Can Jesus make a taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it?

                              Praise!
                              How many times do I have to retype my answer to this stupidest of questions?! Really, I may not be a TC, but this is really stupid

                              If he exists: Yes, he could.

                              "How? What?!". Apparently, Jesus can do anything. Now, what falls under that category? Oh yeah. Making a Taco so hot that he himself cannot eat it.

                              "But, how?! Jesus is GOD! He must be able to eat it!". Well, no. If he wanted to make one so hot the he couldn't swallow it, he could.

                              "Stupid Atheist. He's God. He could eat ANYTHING!". Unless he wanted to make something that he couldn't eat. And logically, that's within his power, isn't it?

                              "But [insert generic comment of refuting argument here]". My point has already been made.

                              Logic wins again. Stupid questions phail. Now, will someone let me shoot this troll? Seriously, if you're going to quote The Simpsons, do it right. It was a BURRITO!
                              Hai guiz wuts goin on in dis internet?

                              Comment

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