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  • Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

    Like the other Godly people on this forum, I call a spade a spade. Now this morning the Holy Spirit led me to go street preaching, and I did preach about the most wicked of all sexual sins: the homosexuality. When I was preaching the Word, a sodomite did approach me, and started telling me all this liberal catholic-inspired nonsense, that "gay is ok" and it was offensive and anti-Christian to call a homosexual a "batty boy". He said Jesus would never have used such derogatory terms, and that he was always loving and caring and was even maybe gay HIMSELF!!!!

    I then rebuked the sodomite and told him he was possessed by a demon, and shooed him on his way. BUT this set me thinking, how I had to start preaching a bit more about who Jesus was, to correct this demonic misconception that he was some kind of homosexual fluffy bunny.

    So the Holy Spirit came upon me, and I preached: WHAT WOULD JESUS BE LIKE IF HE WERE LIVING HERE TODAY? He would be a tough no-nonsense kid at school, he would not take lip from no one, and would pull out his whip if the anyone dared call him a sodomite. He would be into manly things from his early teenage years, like sports and hunting and fixing up old cars. He was a carpenter in his day, which is a pretty hardy profession. He would spend his time sawing and planing, maybe helping old ladies by constructing them a new porch, or maybe a nice summerhouse.

    Of course, they'd probably send him to prison nowadays instead of crucifying him. In the prison, no one would mess with him. He would be top dog and would sort out the demon-loving chaff from the Jesus-loving wheat.

    THIS is the Jesus of the Bible, and it's the Jesus that the liberals and sodomites don't want anyone to know about. BUT IT IS THE TRUTH. PRAISE JESUS.
    "And the evil spirit answered and said, Jesus I know, and Paul I know, but who are ye?" Acts 19:15

  • #2
    Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

    PRAISE JESUS!

    It's so wonderful when the Spirit of the LORD takes over and brings forth such wisdom!
    Drama queen

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    • #3
      Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

      Praise Jesus Brother!

      Some might say that Jesus had a temper, but this is not the case. He simply took decisive action when required.

      "And when he had made a scourge of small cords, he drove them all out of the temple, and the sheep, and the oxen; and poured out the changers' money, and overthrew the tables;" John 2:15 - KJV

      "But those mine enemies, which would not that I should reign over them, bring hither, and slay them before me." Luke 19:27 - KJV
      In Christ!
      Matthew 19:14 "But Jesus said, Suffer little children, and forbid them not, to come unto me: for of such is the kingdom of heaven."

      sigpic

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      • #4
        Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

        Testa-freaking-fy, sir!

        Just a reminder to all of the limp-wristed closet case pseudochristians, that John 3:16 isn't the ONLY VERSE IN THE BIBLE, damnit!
        sigpic

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        • #5
          Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

          The truth is that none of U know what Jesus was like. From the bible, it sounds like he was a deep, spiritual, nice guy who helped sick and poor people and got people to get along with each other. And so he got angry that one time but that doesn't mean anything cuz everyone has a bad day. Besides he was kinda right cuz you should be selling stuff at stores and not churches.

          So whatev. I'm going to believe what I want to believe about Jesus. And MY Jesus is a big-hearted sweetie pie!!!


          Human beings are made of body, mind and spirit.
          Of these, spirit is primary,
          for it connects us to the source of everything,
          the eternal field of consciousness.
          -Deepak Chopra

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          • #6
            Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

            Originally posted by ManyPaths View Post
            The truth is that none of U know what Jesus was like. From the bible, it sounds like he was a deep, spiritual, nice guy who helped sick and poor people and got people to get along with each other. And so he got angry that one time but that doesn't mean anything cuz everyone has a bad day. Besides he was kinda right cuz you should be selling stuff at stores and not churches.

            So whatev. I'm going to believe what I want to believe about Jesus. And MY Jesus is a big-hearted sweetie pie!!!

            It wasn't just one time. Jesus was impolite. Deal with it.
            Drama queen

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            • #7
              Re: Jesus was NOT a PUSSY

              Jesus suffered from a fate worse than any other person in human history and The Holy Bible offers that Jesus took this punishment as a gift for us. Now if that doesn't count as the end all argument that Jesus was NOT a pussy I don't know what else is. In fact I have issue that Jesus and pussy are mentioned in the same conversation but it is a must if we are going to clarify this point. Well spoken my fellow Brothers in Christ!

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