Introduction

[Miguel De Morillo]

I don't go to Church, Jesus is in my heart. my favorite bible verse is Genesis 9:21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.

22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.

23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father's nakedness.

24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.

25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.

Noah drank wine to excess, and took it in the ass from his son, which is exactly what he deserved

I came to find Jesus by reading the flat earth thread on landerover church forum

[GOD=life]

Re: Introduction

Welcome to our friendly forum!

Your introduction doesn't tell much about yourself, but you're quoting from the KJV 1611 Bible, so that's a "" from me.

I can't help you much today since I have become an Atheist today I have already robbed 5 liquor stores today

http://landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=105333

[Miguel De Morillo]

Re: Introduction

Tell us what church you go to and what your favorite Bible verse is and how you came to find Jesus.

just following instructions !

[GOD=life]

Re: Introduction

I see. How about number of children? Wife? Husband? Age? Just curious!

[Billy Bob Jenkins]

Re: Introduction

I don't go to Church, Jesus is in my heart. my favorite bible verse is Genesis 9:21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.

22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.

23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father's nakedness.

24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.

25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his brethren.

Noah drank wine to excess, and took it in the ass from his son, which is exactly what he deserved

I came to find Jesus by reading the flat earth thread on landerover church forum

It is important to know that the Earth is flat. Without this belief it is impossible to embrace the Bible in its entirety, since the Bible lays plain that the Earth is flat in the gospel and elsewhere. See Luke 4:5 and Matthew 4:8 for example. God wants us to accept the entire Bible, and that does not exclude these stories about Jesus and how the Earth is flat.

Welcome to our friendly forum!

Your introduction doesn't tell much about yourself, but you're quoting from the KJV 1611 Bible, so that's a "" from me.

I can't help you much today since I have become an Atheist today I have already robbed 5 liquor stores today

http://landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?t=105333

That is very clever brother, since an atheist would think that robbing 5 liquor stores was a good deed. During my days before Christ as a dope smuggling nudist warlock I dabbled in the dark arts of atheism and the belief that we are descended from monkeys under the authority of the atheist god Charles Darwin. Needless to say this belief drove me to do some devilish things, such as sagging my pants, panhandling, paying taxes, and ritual scatophagia. But through Pastor Ezekiel's Prison Outreach Ministry, my soul and my tattered rape hole were salvaged and restored to spiritual perfection through the miraculous healing powers of Christ.

Praise Him, brother.

[Miguel De Morillo]

Re: Introduction

you shouldn't joke about being an atheist , i only am here to worship Jesus Christ, and associate with other christians

[GOD=life]

Re: Introduction

But through Pastor Ezekiel's Prison Outreach Ministry, my soul and my tattered rape hole were salvaged and restored to spiritual perfection through the miraculous healing powers of Christ.

Wow, that is a very inspirational story! It shows once again that through Christ, everything is possible!

you shouldn't joke about being an atheist , i only am here to worship Jesus Christ, and associate with other christians

There is no shame in trying to see the viewpoint of the other side. How can you understand someone if you don't walk a mile in their shoes?

Waiting for the police to come pick me up

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Introduction

you shouldn't joke about being an atheist , i only am here to worship Jesus Christ, and associate with other christians

Dear foreigner;

Welcome to God's favorite forum. I'm glad to see that you have learned to speak American somewhat, but please try and use proper and respectful capitalization when discussing anything related to God. This includes words such as "Christian" and "Church" and "Baptist."

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel

[Miguel De Morillo]

Re: Introduction

Thank you Pastor Ezekiel for pointing out my error in not capitalizing the word Christians, as I read further I am beginning to understand the superiority of the TRUE CHRISTIAN, and would hope someday to achieve that level of success, so in turn Jesus will take me to walk the streets of gold in paradise.

[Gregory Mitch]

Re: Introduction

I don't go to Church, Jesus is in my heart. my favorite bible verse is Genesis 9:21 And he drank of the wine, and was drunken; and he was uncovered within his tent.

22 And Ham, the father of Canaan, saw the nakedness of his father, and told his two brethren without.

23 And Shem and Japheth took a garment, and laid it upon both their shoulders, and went backward, and covered the nakedness of their father; and their faces were backward, and they saw not their father's nakedness.

24 And Noah awoke from his wine, and knew what his younger son had done unto him.

25 And he said, Cursed be Canaan; a servant of servants shall he be unto his

brethren.

Noah drank wine to excess, and took it in the ass from his son, which is exactly what he deserved

I came to find Jesus by reading the flat earth thread on landerover church forum

Welcome to Landover Baptist, friend. I think that your choice of scripture is a good one. However, we need to know a bit more about you before you become a member of this most holy website. Things like, are you planning on going to church, if so, which one? Are you married? Does your wife respect you?
How many children do you have? Half children or boys? Things like that.

[Miguel De Morillo]

Re: Introduction

Welcome to Landover Baptist, friend. I think that your choice of scripture is a good one. However, we need to know a bit more about you before you become a member of this most holy website. Things like, are you planning on going to church, if so, which one? Are you married? Does your wife respect you?
How many children do you have? Half children or boys? Things like that.

Gregory, I am mixed race having some injun blood, but my WHITE side is dominate, my wife is full blood filthy injun and yes I am in complete control of her, I have two children and I am teaching them to hate their Guatemalan ancestry. I hope to be in a pew praising Jesus soon in Freehold, Iowa.

[Gregory Mitch]

Re: Introduction

Gregory, I am mixed race having some injun blood, but my WHITE side is dominate, my wife is full blood filthy injun and yes I am in complete control of her, I have two children and I am teaching them to hate their Guatemalan ancestry. I hope to be in a pew praising Jesus soon in Freehold, Iowa.

Indeed. I would not say I am an expert in Christian parenting, but it seems you have a good start. Do you homeschool your children? Do you teach them the fear of God?

[Miguel De Morillo]

Re: Introduction

Indeed. I would not say I am an expert in Christian parenting, but it seems you have a good start. Do you homeschool your children? Do you teach them the fear of God?

We do not home school yet , but it is our dream, I do not feel my wife being of guatemalan decent has the ability to teach them, I also keep my children away from the extended family grandparents ect, because they are all filthy catholic, that listen to satans puppet the pope

[Gregory Mitch]

Re: Introduction

How old are your children? Do they go to publik skool?

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Introduction

We do not home school yet , but it is our dream, I do not feel my wife being of guatemalan decent has the ability to teach them, I also keep my children away from the extended family grandparents ect, because they are all filthy catholic, that listen to satans puppet the pope

Your concerns are natural, dear. Might I suggest you simply sit the children down at the table in the morning after your prayers, family devotion, and breakfast, and have them quietly copy the Holy Bible until you are ready for supper? A child can learn all they need from careful reading and studying the Holy Bible. This is what all my children do, and have done, and it works. History, science, government, math, spelling, grammar, and all the academic subjects are included in the histories of this rich resource. It is, indeed, the richest, most perfect resource for learning humans have! Since your wife is a heathen herself, I might consider suggesting the same for her, until it is time to prepare your dinner, of course.