Hi

[Creatiff]

Hey people

Im from England, 16 years old, C of E. Found your forums from looking at "God Hates Fags". Erm...that's it.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hi

Hey people

Im from England, 16 years old, C of E. Found your forums from looking at "God Hates Fags". Erm...that's it.

I'm sorry to hear that you have to live in that Godless hellhole called England. I hope you aren't a homer like most men are over there...

Please tell us why you want to worship satan. C of E is a satanic cult you know...

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Hi

Hello and welcome Creatiff.
Between your screen name, nationality, and your search queery,
it's clear that you are at high risk of running hard aground on the Shoals of Homerism.

Advice: In your favour, at sixteen it's much easier to straighten out
than later on,
unless, say, you were Catholic, in which case the cutoff age is more likely nine, rarely twelve...

those damnable catlick priests.

We are glad to have you here.
Please join in.

Bale from the Clurtch of TingGland
--become a Christian = Landover Baptist!

It's a great deal, not expensive, really, considering that
you get to live forever lolling in the lap of the Lord...

which, I suspect, is something you'd rather like to do, erm...



Cheers,
Peter

[Creatiff]

Re: Hi

Right...well im not homosexual...it seems to be something which you think about quite regularly though...it always seems to be that way, the thing you persecute, you think about most regularly. And i don't know any homosexuals either. Its crazy how uneducated you are, the fact that you are a pastor is surely some kind of sick joke. However, i fear not. Just know your empire will fall, like every other one before it.

I dont worship satan either. Another person you seem mighty keen on...

Bah, whatever, do you enjoy being pointlessly angry and extremist?

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Hi

Right...well im not homosexual...
(Members note: that's code speak---homers always speak in opposites)


Bah, whatever, do you enjoy being pointlessly angry and extremist?

Nobody's angry here,
not if you promise to embrace the Lord
(meant, in the correct non-homo way)

Get into the swing of things, buy some swag while you're at it.
Go to our home page

http://www.landoverbaptist.org/

And check out our great BASH program.

http://www.bettybowers.com/bash.html

There may be hope for you yet...this could be you!
http://www.bettybowers.com/ray1.html

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Hi

Right...well im not homosexual...it seems to be something which you think about quite regularly though...it always seems to be that way, the thing you persecute, you think about most regularly. And i don't know any homosexuals either. Its crazy how uneducated you are, the fact that you are a pastor is surely some kind of sick joke. However, i fear not. Just know your empire will fall, like every other one before it.

I dont worship satan either. Another person you seem mighty keen on...

Bah, whatever, do you enjoy being pointlessly angry and extremist?

And I suppose you want us to consider you 'smart' and 'educated' by throwing out a few cliches to 'impress' us?

The empire of Jesus will NEVER fall, God will reign supreme on earth, as he does in Heaven.
The only ones who will fall are the ungodly ones, people like you, who will be slayed by the Lord at the last of days.

And the remnant were slain with the sword of him that sat upon the horse, which sword proceeded out of his mouth:
And all the fowls were filled with their flesh.
Revelation 19:21

Every knee will bend before God Allmighty, there is nowhere to escape for you! Nowhere to hide from God!
YOU WILL BOW BEFORE GOD, AND CONFESS HIM, EVEN AS HE THROWS YOU IN HELL!
GLORY!

For it is written, As I live, saith the Lord, every knee shall bow to me, and every tongue shall confess to God.
Romans 14:11

[Creatiff]

Re: Hi

And I suppose you want us to consider you 'smart' and 'educated' by throwing out a few cliches to 'impress' us?

The empire of Jesus will NEVER fall, God will reign supreme on earth, as he does in Heaven.
The only ones who will fall are the ungodly ones, people like you, who will be slayed by the Lord at the last of days.

lol i didnt say the empire of jesus, i should have specified. I meant the empire of the landover baptist church, sorry, my bad.

and no, i know myself that i am smart and educated, so i don't feel the need to prove it to you. And how am i using clichés? explain to me why you believe this to be the case.

Thnx

[SalvationSeeker]

Re: Hi

lol i didnt say the empire of jesus, i should have specified. I meant the empire of the landover baptist church, sorry, my bad.

and no, i know myself that i am smart and educated, so i don't feel the need to prove it to you. And how am i using clichés? explain to me why you believe this to be the case.

Thnx

'All empires fall' is a known cliche, and untrue.
And you yourself just agreed that the empire of Jesus will never fall, thus you have just contradicted yourself completly..

Logic isn't your strong side neither, is it, boy?


As for our Church, Jesus own Church, it is the ONLY Church left to carry out His will, unquestioningly..
Thus if you want us gone, you want the earthly will of Jesus, gone!
Why do you oppose the Lord Jesus, don't you know what will happen to those who does?

[Bobby-Joe]

Re: Hi

Welcome Cardiff.

I personally pray that you overcome your innate homerness for being English. There is no use denying it; the hot and sweaty sadomasochistic man on man rituals of the English public schools are well documented over here in Landover. We are personal amazed you English can even summon the minimal decency to come up with that Neo-Satanic Church of England considering how much time you all spend bent over and offering your firm, taunt buttocks to other men.

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Hi

Welcome Cardiff.

I personally pray that you overcome your innate homerness for being English. There is no use denying it; the hot and sweaty sadomasochistic man on man rituals of the English public schools are well documented over here in Landover. We are personal amazed you English can even summon the minimal decency to come up with that Neo-Satanic Church of England considering how much time you all spend bent over and offering your firm, taunt buttocks to other men.

Taunt! I love (to) taunt English boys'(who are) buttocks,
most generally. Most generally, these lads are "Proud". That in itself is perverse,
seeing as how their homerland punked off a million square miles of British Empire during the last century. Pissants (pardon french).

Creatiff, I'll paraphrase you slightly:

"I am smart. I am edumacated and proud to be English."

Examine your pride, son.

That's the ugliest word
IF it is applied by anyone other than a True Christian™.

Beware this pride you flaunt --as if you were God's gift to yourself-.
Pride demonstrated as you have done so far (hectoring speeches included) is nothng but public Onanism of
the tongue in the place of the tallywhacker.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: Hi

Friend, do you reject the Devil, his servant the sodomite Archbishop of Canterbury, and all their works? Do you consider the Bishop of Southwark to be a good role model? Now that you're 16, do you intend to enlist in the British Army and join the glorious crusade to purge the Middle East of towelheaded Mahommedan heathens? If not, why not?

[TwinkBoy]

Re: Hi

Right...well im not homosexual...it seems to be something which you think about quite regularly though...it always seems to be that way, the thing you persecute, you think about most regularly. And i don't know any homosexuals either. Its crazy how uneducated you are, the fact that you are a pastor is surely some kind of sick joke. However, i fear not. Just know your empire will fall, like every other one before it.

I dont worship satan either. Another person you seem mighty keen on...

Bah, whatever, do you enjoy being pointlessly angry and extremist?

Hello love! And welcome to the ILLUSTRIOUS LBC!! Seems you hadn't even put one foot in the door and the self righteous hate-mongers (in the name of JeSuS...but of course) began making ridiculous assumptions about you. You WILL discover that the "holier than thou" crowd here DOES in fact spend MUCH time thinking about homosexuals. The love to persecute them along with everyone else who is not one of them. Annnddd...of course they all enjoy being pointlessly angry and extremists. Oh, don't worry love, today they hate you BUT tomorrow they'll be preaching "God is Love" sermons and loving you to death I suppose today they are fixated on "God is hate and wrath." Oh well...you'll see what I mean.

Cheers love!
Twink

[Poetic Peter]

Re: Hi

"And i don't know any homosexuals either."




He sure does now.

[Brother Love]

Re: Hi

"And i don't know any homosexuals either."




He sure does now.

Yeap he sure does now Brother Peter and the biggest one of 'em all

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Hi

The boy is from a Godless land known for its rampant sodomy, and is a false Christian who worships the Queen of england, so it logically follows that he is a hellbound homer. The fact that he denies being a pervert only proves that he is. Jesus hates that.

Romans 1:26-27
For this cause God gave them up unto vile affections: for even their women did change the natural use into that which is against nature. And likewise also the men, leaving the natural use of the woman burned in their lust one toward another; men with men working that which is unseemly, and receiving in themselves that recompence of their error which was meet.

No doubt he is here to persecute True Christians™.