[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

but Pastor Ezekiel, Mary Magdalene was a prostitute. And Jesus was a friend to everyone, rich, poor, sinner, saint. And as a matter of fact, I have been saved. I actually find it offensive that you would call me unsaved scum when Ive been a Christian for the majority of my life. Of course I don't claim to be Christian now, but it isn't like I don't know what it is like.

Please show us which scripture backs up your claim that Jesus "was a friend to" prostitutes. He told prostitutes to "GO AND SIN NO MORE!" He didn't invite them over for a pink tea party! Jesus HATES unrepentant sinners, boy.

And I am not moved by your hissyfit. I am called upon by JESUS CHRIST to rebuke you in His name! I find it offensive that an unsaved wad of garbage like you would waltz uninvited into our Christian forum for no reason other than to spew hatred at us. Do we go into monkey worshiping forums and tell them they're wrong for worshiping monkeys?

As for your claims of having once been a Christian, that is a slap in the face to Jesus. One of my cousins is a professional golfer. Does that mean that I'm one too? You have never been washed clean of sin in His blood, so you are not and never have been a Christian.

That having been said, I'm sure that Christ has called you here for a reason. Maybe you are a fruit that is ripe for the plucking. Open your heart to His Manly love and you may avoid spending eternity in the lake of fire.

Maybe.

[Martin Poofter]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

No, he came here to argue with Jesus and had his ass served back to him.

First of all I'd like to take issue with your blasphemous avatar. Care to explain that?

I have just noticed that you have the effrontery to claim that I came here to argue with Jesus. I most certainly did not, unless you claim to be Jesus.

I see you have already promoted yourself to a King so Jesus can't be too far to the right, or left, depending on which way you swing, I suppose.

My ass, as you Americans so quaintly call my buttocks, has never left my body unlike your head, which appears to be in the heavens, along with your preaching.

I've got you nailed, as Mel Gibson might say. It's all about the money, honey.

[Nobar King]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

I have just noticed that you have the effrontery to claim that I came here to argue with Jesus. I most certainly did not, unless you claim to be Jesus.

Whatever. I'm not your therapist. I don't study every case. Did I make a mistake in your case? What did you come her for, then?

I see you have already promoted yourself to a King so Jesus can't be too far to the right, or left, depending on which way you swing, I suppose.

That's my last name, dummy, and I resent the ambiguous sexual innuendo.

[Frothy Soda]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

Oh yeah, christian boy? well i hope you get to heaven to enjoy eternity with your gay ass god and his incest son. oh wait, THEYRE THE SAME FUCKING PERSON. WHO THE FUCK COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING? speaking of coming, Im sure jesus will "second come" all over your face as you open your gay cock loving ass so he can fill you with "His Manly Love". FUCK YOU racist ass bitches and your fucking conservative ignorant fat american-loving asses. grow old with your insecurities you place in a religion you know shit about and die and never exist like the rest of us. because thats whats going to happen because youre fucking stuck in the god damn bronze age!

youre fucking lucky for rule #44, assholes. go suck a cock


.|..

[Nobar King]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

WTH is rule #44?
Is it something from hockey?
NHL.com - Rules: Official Rules - Rule 44: Checking from Behind

[John Bois Ward]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

I don't agree with the original poster on some issues, though. I find useful teachings in many religions, including Satanism, Christianity, Buddhism, Yogaism, Judaism, and others like atheism, and of course, agnosticism. I haven't found anything redeeming in Scientology as of yet, but I think we all feel the same about Scientology, am I right?

It seems that you took Pascal’s Wager too literally and have hedge your bets. You call yourself an agnostic and pick and choose from all the religions underneath the sun in the hope that when you die, you are covered. I’m sorry sir, but you will lose your bet because the money is on God and He only pays out to those who commit 100%.

I would suggest you visit the godless Richard Dawkins’ site, but I doubt even he would accept an agnostic (a namby pamby fence sitter).

[Nurse Clampett]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

Oh yeah, christian boy? well i hope you get to heaven to enjoy eternity with your gay ass god and his incest son. oh wait, THEYRE THE SAME piffleING PERSON. WHO THE piffle COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING? speaking of coming, Im sure jesus will "second come" all over your face as you open your gay cock loving ass so he can fill you with "His Manly Love". piffle YOU racist ass bitches and your piffleing conservative ignorant fat american-loving asses. grow old with your insecurities you place in a religion you know shit about and die and never exist like the rest of us. because thats whats going to happen because youre piffleing stuck in the god damn bronze age!

youre piffleing lucky for rule #44, assholes. go suck a cock


.|..

Gee, I'm sure no one saw that coming from you.

[Martin Poofter]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

One of my cousins is a professional golfer.

I did wonder who it was following Tiger Woods with a dirty towel in his hand, muttering "Stick it in Jesus' hole for the good of my wallet"

But it does bring your parentage into question.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

Oh yeah, christian boy? well i hope you get to heaven to enjoy eternity with your gay ass god and his incest son. oh wait, THEYRE THE SAME piffleING PERSON. WHO THE piffle COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING? speaking of coming, Im sure jesus will "second come" all over your face as you open your gay cock loving ass so he can fill you with "His Manly Love". piffle YOU racist ass bitches and your piffleing conservative ignorant fat american-loving asses. grow old with your insecurities you place in a religion you know shit about and die and never exist like the rest of us. because thats whats going to happen because youre piffleing stuck in the god damn bronze age!

youre piffleing lucky for rule #44, assholes. go suck a cock


.|..

Uhmm Pastors, I think we might need a little moderation on this thread. Mr. Soda seems to be having an "episode" of some sort.

Thanks for visting son. Enjoy being Banned or Quarantined. Oh, and say hello to Satan for us while he's having his way with your backside for eternity!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

Oh yeah, christian boy? well i hope you get to heaven to enjoy eternity with your gay ass god and his incest son. oh wait, THEYRE THE SAME piffleING PERSON. WHO THE piffle COULD HAVE SEEN THAT COMING? speaking of coming, Im sure jesus will "second come" all over your face as you open your gay cock loving ass so he can fill you with "His Manly Love". piffle YOU racist ass bitches and your piffleing conservative ignorant fat american-loving asses. grow old with your insecurities you place in a religion you know shit about and die and never exist like the rest of us. because thats whats going to happen because youre piffleing stuck in the god damn bronze age!

youre piffleing lucky for rule #44, assholes. go suck a cock


.|..

So much for "I just wanna be your friend," huh?

Never trust an atheist.

[Martin Poofter]

Re: I have a false religion. THOSE piffleING HEATHENS.

Hit me, Pastor Ezekiel, so that I may join my alter ego, Bliar in Quarantine.

Canada, England, where next will you find the real Jesus?

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

oh, hang on, i just found the source oif my avatar!

http://www.flickr.com/photos/bar-art/414998399/

go figure :p but apparently, some people do think that Jesus and dinosaurs were alive at the same time. and that He even rode one possibly? Odd.

Jesus didn't ride dinosaurs. He tied an ass and a colt together, and rode both animals at the same time.

Matt 21:5-7 Tell ye the daughter of Sion, Behold, thy King cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass. And the disciples went, and did as Jesus commanded them, And brought the ass, and the colt, and put on them their clothes, and they set him thereon.

Hosanna!

Pastor Billy-Reuben

[Martin Poofter]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

Jesus didn't ride dinosaurs. He tied an ass and a colt together, and rode both animals at the same time.

Matt 21:5-7 Tell ye the daughter of Sion, Behold, thy King cometh unto thee, meek, and sitting upon an ass, and a colt the foal of an ass. And the disciples went, and did as Jesus commanded them, And brought the ass, and the colt, and put on them their clothes, and they set him thereon.

Hosanna!

Pastor Billy-Reuben

You are too late. He's in quarantine. Bring him back so that he can read your epitaph.

[Pastor Billy-Reuben]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

You are too late. He's in quarantine. Bring him back so that he can read your epitaph.

He can still read it. He just can't reply here.

[JennyD]

Re: Agnostics: what do they know?

You are too late. He's in quarantine. Bring him back so that he can read your epitaph.

Do you know what "epitaph" means, Martian?