Hello All

[Brother Baconeater]

My name is Brother Baconeater. I'm a bit confused, that is why I don't belong to any church right now.
I live in atheist Canada, and everyone knows it isn't a cool thing to let people know how much you love the Lord, so bonding with other strong believers like me has been pretty hard right from childhood all the way to where I am right now, pushing 50.
I know, I know, I shoulda moved to Georgia or Texas where I would be accepted, but I never had the nerve to.
The real reason I'm confused is that I like both the Christian God, and Jesus of course, but I like the Jewish God a lot too. That guy knew how to deal with people who pissed him off.
I like the Christian God because you need to believe in Him to get into heaven for ever and ever, but the turn the other cheek stuff just doesn't make sense.
I'm not crazy about the Jewish God though because he seems to be wishy washy about evilution. The Christian God has no doubt that evilution is false which it it.
Oh, and the Muslim God? Forget it. He tells people to blow themselves up in front of children for no good reason. At least the Jewish God had a reason to kill kids.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Hello All

My name is Brother Baconeater. I'm a bit confused, that is why I don't belong to any church right now.
I live in atheist Canada, and everyone knows it isn't a cool thing to let people know how much you love the Lord, so bonding with other strong believers like me has been pretty hard right from childhood all the way to where I am right now, pushing 50.

Welcome, friend. How many Christian Soldiers has your wife sired for you?
You should get to work immediately fixing that not going to Church thing. An Independent Baptist church that only follows the KJV1611 should suffice. I'll call your prospective Pastor to interview him if needed.

I know, I know, I shoulda moved to Georgia or Texas where I would be accepted, but I never had the nerve to.

Indeed you should have. I had the fortune of growing up in Godly Texas. I know, try not to be jealous because that's a sin.

The real reason I'm confused is that I like both the Christian God, and Jesus of course, but I like the Jewish God a lot too. That guy knew how to deal with people who pissed him off.
I like the Christian God because you need to believe in Him to get into heaven for ever and ever, but the turn the other cheek stuff just doesn't make sense.
I'm not crazy about the Jewish God though because he seems to be wishy washy about evilution. The Christian God has no doubt that evilution is false which it it.

Wherein lies your confusion, friend? They are one in the same.

In John 10:30, Jesus clearly says,
I and my Father are one.

God hasn't changed. He is the same forever.

1 Peter 1:25
But the word of the Lord endureth for ever. And this is the word which by the gospel is preached unto you.

Oh, and the Muslim God? Forget it. He tells people to blow themselves up in front of children for no good reason. At least the Jewish God had a reason to kill kids.

Truer word were never spoken.
I just thank the LORD he sent you here for True Salvation®.

[Brother Baconeater]

Re: Hello All

I haven't sired any kids. I saved myself for marriage. Got married at 32. The evilutionist doctor gave me all kinds of gibberish reasons why nobody was getting pregnant but I know the real reason why. My sperm died of old age.
I shouldn't have waited so long, but masturbation is a sin, so I was stuck between a rock and hard place.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Hello All

I haven't sired any kids. I saved myself for marriage. Got married at 32.The evilutionist doctor gave me all kinds of gibberish reasons why nobody was getting pregnant but I know the real reason why. My sperm died of old age.
I shouldn't have waited so long, but masturbation is a sin, so I was stuck between a rock and hard place.

Such a shame. Have you considered the likelihood that your wife is to blame? Those eggs start to rot after the age of 19 or so.

One need look no further than sister Sarah Palin as a cautionary tale of this sort of thing.

[No Secrets Victoria]

Re: Hello All

Brother Bacon, our God is the only true GOD. That's all there is to it, so don't be wasting anymore of your time thinking about the all those other make-believe GOD's.



GOD BLESS CANADIANS WHO BELIEVE IN THE REAL GOD!

[Brother Enoch]

Re: Hello All

GOD BLESS CANADIANS WHO BELIEVE IN THE REAL GOD!

Counting myself, the seven soldiers for Jesus I've sired, and the scattered few Canucks who have made it to this forum, I'd extrapolate that we're talking about less than 500 people out of 34 million. Saudi Arabia probably has more True Christians(tm) than Canada.

[Levi Jones]

Re: Hello All

Counting myself, the seven soldiers for Jesus I've sired, and the scattered few Canucks who have made it to this forum, I'd extrapolate that we're talking about less than 500 people out of 34 million. Saudi Arabia probably has more True Christians™ than Canada.

Godly true, Brother Enoch! The foreigners on God's Favorite Forum make up a tiny, but colorful minority. It's little people like you who make up our rich cultural diversity at LBC.

[True Disciple]

Re: Hello All

Welcome, Brother! When you first posted your godly vid debunking evilution, I already hoped to hear more of you! Have you already thought about a possible career in Creation Science?