Hi, everyone.

[Jarod Osborne]

I must say it's very nice to have found this place. I'm 24 years old and a recent convert. I'm sure my stay here will be a fulfilling experience.

[Down with Pagans]

Re: Hi, everyone.

How did you find Jesus? Are you pure white as Jesus or do you need our de-blackification treatment to become as white and pure as Jesus?

[Jarod Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

How did you find Jesus? Are you pure white as Jesus or do you need our de-blackification treatment to become as white and pure as Jesus?

Sweetheart, I'm as Aryan as they come. Why you would even assume any Negroid heritage on my part is truly confusing. Further, if I did have such a disability to overcome, I can assure you such help would not be provided by a self-professed "previouzly unruly female."

[James Dewitt]

Re: Hi, everyone.

I must say it's very nice to have found this place. I'm 24 years old and a recent convert. I'm sure my stay here will be a fulfilling experience.

So tell me what brings you to our little church? Do you love Jesus as much as He loves you? What is you very favorite Bible verse? Are you a fan of stoning?

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Hi, everyone.

I must say it's very nice to have found this place. I'm 24 years old and a recent convert. I'm sure my stay here will be a fulfilling experience.

Hello Mr Osborne and welcome to God's Favorite Forum.

Please share with us your reason for coming to The Lord; as well as your favorite Scripture.

Also, are you married?

I look forward to your responses.

YIC,

Mrs.P.Wintersnow

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Hi, everyone.

Are you a fan of stoning?

Gosh Brother! Who isn't!


YIC,

Mrs.P.Wintersnow

[Jarod Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

So tell me what brings you to our little church? Do you love Jesus as much as He loves you? What is you very favorite Bible verse? Are you a fan of stoning?

I came because I had been told that this is the only community to visit for a group of people who follow the word of God as it is written. I truly love Jesus. I am one with our Lord and Savior, and it seems I have found a community that shares that love. My favorite Bible verse, if I have to choose, is Matthew 10:34

"Think not that I am come to send peace on earth: I came not to send peace, but a sword."

I absolutely stand behind our duty to our Lord to stone harlots and followers of false prophets, and blasphemous heathens, amongst others. To deny the importance of stoning is to deny the word of the Bible.

[Jarod Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

Hello Mr Osborne and welcome to God's Favorite Forum.

Please share with us your reason for coming to The Lord; as well as your favorite Scripture.

Also, are you married?

I look forward to your responses.

YIC,

Mrs.P.Wintersnow

I am, indeed, married to a lovely baptist woman with whom I've fathered 4 children, one of whom is still in the womb. I have not come to The Lord, for He came to me., guiding me in my hour of need. His love gave me strength when I needed it the most, His Light guiding me through a world that grows ever darker. His Love fills an emptiness that only recently was I able to acknowledge. Of that which He has given me, I will never be worthy.

[Phebe Carlyle]

Re: Hi, everyone.

I am, indeed, married to a lovely baptist woman with whom I've fathered 4 children, one of whom is still in the womb. I have not come to The Lord, for He came to me., guiding me in my hour of need. His love gave me strength when I needed it the most, His Light guiding me through a world that grows ever darker. His Love fills an emptiness that only recently was I able to acknowledge. Of that which He has given me, I will never be worthy.

That is wonderful Mr Osborne. How long have you been married and despite your wife being with child, is she still performing all her wifely duties as expected?

Mrs.P.Wintersnow.

[Jarod Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

That is wonderful Mr Osborne. How long have you been married and despite your wife being with child, is she still performing all her wifely duties as expected?

Mrs.P.Wintersnow.

We have been married for just under 3 and a half blissful years. As I said earlier, she is a good Christian (and has been for longer than I have, I might add.) She is content with her role as my wife, and does everything that could be asked of her. She's very bright too, I haven't had to punish her but once since we've been together, and she quickly learned better than to voice an opinion that contradicts mine.

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

Welcome, Mr. Osborne. That's a fine name you have there. There is, of course, a good chance we might be related somehow. I've done some genealogical research and discovered many interesting things. My great-great-great grandfather, Jeremiah Lee Osborne was a prominent preacher in Mississippi during the Reconstruction period after the Civil War. He led several successful lynchings against unruly negroes in his town. Truly a great man and I'm proud to be part of his pedigree.

On the flip side, I actually discovered that Ozzy Osbourne, the Satanic rock 'n roller, is my 4th cousin. But there's good chance that his whore of a mother was not impregnated by a Godly Osborne and cheated on him with some random scoundrel. I can't see anyone in our family creating such a monster.

[Jarod Osborne]

Re: Hi, everyone.

Welcome, Mr. Osborne. That's a fine name you have there. There is, of course, a good chance we might be related somehow. I've done some genealogical research and discovered many interesting things. My great-great-great grandfather, Jeremiah Lee Osborne was a prominent preacher in Mississippi during the Reconstruction period after the Civil War. He led several successful lynchings against unruly negroes in his town. Truly a great man and I'm proud to be part of his pedigree. On the flip side, I actually discovered that Ozzy Osbourne, the Satanic rock 'n roller, is my 4th cousin. But there's good chance that his whore of a mother was not impregnated by a Godly Osborne and cheated on him with some random scoundrel. I can't see anyone in our family creating such a monster.

My father's side of the family does hail from the Mississippi/Louisiana, so it's definitely a distinct possibility. I can't say I've paid particular attention to my genealogy, but it truly would be a blessing to have descended from such a man. Regardless of lineage, we are all descended from Adam and Eve, and all true Christians are brothers in spirit.

As for that freakshow, Ozzy, may God have mercy on his soul, though he surely doesn't deserve it.