[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

I accept that my religious views may not be correct.

Listen Bicycle, then you should also accept that you're hellbound! The Bible is an all or nothing kid of deal. Either you believe EVERY LAST WORD or you believe NONE OF IT! So which is Bike my boy, all or nothing?!?

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

The first and foremost thing we believe in is that the Whole Bible is The way to God not parts of it. If you wish to say we are wrong show it with scripture to prove your point.

Deuteronomy 4:2 Ye shall not add unto the word which I command you, neither shall ye diminish ought from it, that ye may keep the commandments of the LORD your God which I command you.
Proverbs 30:5 Every word of God is pure: he is a shield unto them that put their trust in him.
Proverbs 30:6 Add thou not unto his words, lest he reprove thee, and thou be found a liar.
James 2:10 For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all.

Listen Bicycle, then you should also accept that you're hellbound! The Bible is an all or nothing kid of deal. Either you believe EVERY LAST WORD or you believe NONE OF IT! So which is Bike my boy, all or nothing?!?

In response to both quotes; Since I am no expert in The Holy Bible's scriptures, I accept that all of it is true. And I shall conduct myself in such a fashion.

In the words of The Great J.C himself: "If life were fair, Dan Quayle would be making a living asking 'Do you want fries with that?'"

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

yada yada yada

That sure looks like a bicycle in your avatar.

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

That sure looks like a bicycle in your avatar.

It's a tricycle with two wheels in the front, you see. Makes for greater stability in smiting of killer rabbits.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

It's a tricycle with two wheels in the front, you see. Makes for greater stability in smiting of killer rabbits.

OK, besides being unfunny, do you have any other reasons for being on our Holy forum? We get trolls in here 24/7 pal, so it's not like you're the first doofus to try to pull the wool over our eyes.

Were any of your supposed relatives blown up in Pakistan when those Ahmadis got sent to hell by those even crazier Muslims?

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

OK, besides being unfunny, do you have any other reasons for being on our Holy forum? We get trolls in here 24/7 pal, so it's not like your the first doofus to try to pull the wool over our eyes.

For one, I plan to help members of Landover Baptist Church learn to differentiate between the proper use of "your" and "you're". Would you like some help?

Were any of your supposed relatives blown up in Pakistan when those Ahmadis got sent to hell by those even crazier Muslims?

And no, I'll have to disappoint you there. They disliked the weather conditions and established a short-lived colony of Ahmad followers around the mouth Nyamuragira volcano.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

So you've sunk to editing quotes to make me look stupid already? I feel sorry for you, I really do. Hell is no joke friend, and that is where you're headed if you don't straighten up and fly right.

Jesus sent you to us for a reason, won't you let us help you fill your black soul with His white-hot love? He is waiting for you Bicycle!

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

So you've sunk to editing quotes to make me look stupid already? I feel sorry for you, I really do. Hell is no joke friend, and that is where you're headed if you don't straighten up and fly right.

Jesus sent you to us for a reason, won't you let us help you fill your black soul with His white-hot love? He is waiting for you Bicycle!

Well, I've agreed to accept your Holy Bible as it is. Does Jesus support the supposedly rural country of Southern Africa as he does America? There are quite a few nudist tribals around after all.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

Well, I've agreed to accept your Holy Bible as it is. Does Jesus support the supposedly rural country of Southern Africa as he does America? There are quite a few nudist tribals around after all.

Of course not! America is God's Favorite Country™, and He's even got issues with us, what with that commie Osambo in office!

I'm pretty sure God is still upset that you all let the Negros take over down there. What was up with that anyway? How could you all just let a bunch of darkies armed with sticks overrun your government?

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

Of course not! America is God's Favorite Country™, and He's even got issues with us, what with that commie Osambo in office!

I'm pretty sure God is still upset that you all let the Negros take over down there. What was up with that anyway? How could you all just let a bunch of darkies armed with sticks overrun your government?

I see. I guess I've been forever damned to the depths of hell and it's eternal flame. Oh well. I can still be optimistic. I make good pancakes, if that counts.

I suppose the legacy of Mandela stands as our country's icon, and the legions of Negros behind him will forever stand for the African National Congress(ANC) as Government.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Greetings

Where did you get that photo of a White man? Did you steal it?

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

Where did you get that photo of a White man? Did you steal it?

I was born a white man and have been one ever since.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

I was born a white man and have been one ever since.

So you're what, like 70-something years old? What was it like when the Boer were in charge down there? Have you ever been chased by a lion? Where you on the Axis or the Allied's side in WWII?

[B. Repairman]

Re: Greetings

So you're what, like 70-something years old? What was it like when the Boer were in charge down there? Have you ever been chased by a lion? Where you on the Axis or the Allied's side in WWII?

I'm due to turn 62 in a bit short of a month, but I feel no older than 19! The Boer weren't a bad bunch, but their racist actions and opression of black people wasn't the best idea. Luckily, I had a very attractive house cleaner named Patience.

I never did take part in WWII myself. Was only just born. But I now support the Allies.

[Capt. Aaron Portway]

Re: Greetings

I'm due to turn 62 in a bit short of a month, but I feel no older than 19! The Boer weren't a bad bunch, but their racist actions and opression of black people wasn't the best idea. Luckily, I had a very attractive house cleaner named Patience.

I never did take part in WWII myself. Was only just born. But I now support the Allies.

You're only 61?!? You must've lived a pretty rough life. Are you an alcoholic or something? Why do you look so broken down and decrepit in your avatar? You look like you could drop dead any minute!