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Hello everyone, my name is Joseph McManus AKA PhilTheAtheist: banned and shamed former member. Pastor Ezekiel told me via email I would be allowed to return provided I behave myself, and I thank him for that, bless his heart. I want to apologize, I said a few things I shouldn't have said to various True Christians™ and I was wrong. I also created multiple accounts and I was wrong for that as well.
The reason I seek to return is quite simply I need help. A few weeks ago something happened that opened my eyes and shut them at the same time. I feel I heard the voice of God and in the following days researching Christianity I stumbled upon Landover Baptist Church and joined hoping to find answers. For reasons I'm not sure of I attacked members and spread hate and never got the therapy I was seeking, so I'm back now, no cute, "witty" names, just me, seeking help.
A few weeks ago, after laying down to go to sleep I became aware of a "presence" in my house. I got up to check all the rooms and make sure the doors were locked and came back to bed. I still felt something was there, I can't describe what. I hadn't heard a sound or seen anything at all, I just felt something was there.
I became sleepy and while laying there I heard a voice, as clear as anything. It said to me "I'm here, but you're not looking". The voice seemed to boom from around me, almost like thunder but I knew it was talking only to me. I was sleepy, confused, I didn't know what to think. I was too scared to stand up, so I looked around the room while still laying down. I didn't see anything at all, I could only feel something, I knew there was something there. I grabbed my phone and turned it on and used the light to further search the room and the more I looked the fainter the presence felt to me.
I didn't, and still don't, know what I should have done. I truly feel now that this was the voice of God speaking to me. My wife lay next to me and never stirred. I finally woke her up and asked if she heard anything and she responded that I was just dreaming. I lay back down, but needless to say, I didn't sleep much that night.
I feel now that perhaps the next course of action would be to begin reading the Bible and attending Church, but the only Bible I have in the house is a children's Bible my father in law gave to each of my kids when they were born. I don't have a KJV Bible, nor do I know of any Baptists Churches in the area.
Please help me. As an Atheist I'm in unfamiliar waters. I wasn't sleeping, I know what I heard. It was Him but He didn't give me any clues as to the next step and that's why I'm here.
The reason I seek to return is quite simply I need help. A few weeks ago something happened that opened my eyes and shut them at the same time. I feel I heard the voice of God and in the following days researching Christianity I stumbled upon Landover Baptist Church and joined hoping to find answers. For reasons I'm not sure of I attacked members and spread hate and never got the therapy I was seeking, so I'm back now, no cute, "witty" names, just me, seeking help.
A few weeks ago, after laying down to go to sleep I became aware of a "presence" in my house. I got up to check all the rooms and make sure the doors were locked and came back to bed. I still felt something was there, I can't describe what. I hadn't heard a sound or seen anything at all, I just felt something was there.
I became sleepy and while laying there I heard a voice, as clear as anything. It said to me "I'm here, but you're not looking". The voice seemed to boom from around me, almost like thunder but I knew it was talking only to me. I was sleepy, confused, I didn't know what to think. I was too scared to stand up, so I looked around the room while still laying down. I didn't see anything at all, I could only feel something, I knew there was something there. I grabbed my phone and turned it on and used the light to further search the room and the more I looked the fainter the presence felt to me.
I didn't, and still don't, know what I should have done. I truly feel now that this was the voice of God speaking to me. My wife lay next to me and never stirred. I finally woke her up and asked if she heard anything and she responded that I was just dreaming. I lay back down, but needless to say, I didn't sleep much that night.
I feel now that perhaps the next course of action would be to begin reading the Bible and attending Church, but the only Bible I have in the house is a children's Bible my father in law gave to each of my kids when they were born. I don't have a KJV Bible, nor do I know of any Baptists Churches in the area.
Please help me. As an Atheist I'm in unfamiliar waters. I wasn't sleeping, I know what I heard. It was Him but He didn't give me any clues as to the next step and that's why I'm here.
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