[Bible Student]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

Originally Posted by Bible Student Tell us about your garden.Song of Solomon -- Awake, O Northwinde, and come thou South, blow vpon my garden, that the spices thereof may flow out: let my beloued come into his garden, and eate his pleasant fruits.

I do not have a garden. Is this something that is commanded of me then?

No, not commanded. But that verse does tell you how to attract a future husband, biblically. How else is he going to "eate his pleasant fruits?"

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

I've been looking for a Christian forum for a little while now. This one seems like a good one. I've read some of the threads and agree with much of what has been said. That said though, I also disagree with some things that have been said. But I am here to learn more about other people's opinions.

I hope this is the right forum for me.

What kind of an introduction is that? We don't know anything about you. Do you even have your husband's permission to be posting here? What church does he take you to? How often does he lay on good Christian beatings? Not often enough I'd say.

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Miss B]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

You don't need to tell me twice, Pastor Ezekiel.

As said in a previous post, I do not have a husband. I attend the New Hope Baptist church in my hometown with my father every Sunday and my favorite book of the Bible is Daniel - KJV of course.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

And for the record, I am with womb and a great cook.

You don't need to tell me twice, Pastor Ezekiel.

As said in a previous post, I do not have a husband. I attend the New Hope Baptist church in my hometown with my father every Sunday and my favorite book of the Bible is Daniel - KJV of course.

What does "I am with womb" supposed to mean?

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

You don't need to tell me twice, Pastor Ezekiel.

As said in a previous post, I do not have a husband. I attend the New Hope Baptist church in my hometown with my father every Sunday and my favorite book of the Bible is Daniel - KJV of course.

How old are you again?

[Miss B]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

What does "I am with womb" supposed to mean?

Someone (in this thread - have you read it at all?) accused me of being without womb. I was merely pointing out that that accusation was false.

How old are you again?

I turned 30 yesterday.

[Cranky Old Man]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

I turned 30 yesterday.

So you have wasted 30 years of your life so far? Why not shut up, get married and get babies?

1st Timothy 2:11-12 "Let the woman learn in silence with all subjection. But I suffer not a woman to teach, nor to usurp authority over the man, but to be in silence."

[Reverand Stubber]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

I know better than to disagree with anything that is supported biblically. If I ever do, it would be because I am misinformed and I would rather ask for explanations than make a fool of myself.



Sadly, I do not have a husband, yet. So zero sons.

Why aren't you married? Are you ugly? Leave the burgers alone, lose a few pounds, get rid of the moustache & find a man. Then you can get on with your life's purpose: creating Christian soldiers for the Lord.

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

I turned 30 yesterday.

You're about 14 years behind in the baby making department. I have many single young men who you could be partnered with. Of course, I'd have to make an inspection first to ascertain the token of your virginity. I feel that 20 year old virgin studs deserve a virgin wife. If you are used goods then there are plenty of older men whose wives have passed on. Old Man Dickerson would probably be a good match for you. A 30 year old woman who has gone this long without husband or children is probably in need of a older man to show her the ropes. He's 62, single and still has a full head of hair.

[Miss B]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

Old Man Dickerson would probably be a good match for you. A 30 year old woman who has gone this long with husband or children is probably in need of a older man to show her the ropes. He's 62, single and still has a full head of hair.

Without saying whether I am used goods or not, my father told me to thank you for the above offer. I would be thrilled to take you up on that offer. Just one question? How strong is his heart still?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

What does "I am with womb" supposed to mean?

Quick enough to tell people to read the forum to see if their point has already been addressed before wasting the you sky fairies bandwidth, you can't even read up a couple of posts.

I suspect she is without womb.

What's up Zekie Boy? Are those fingers getting too stubby to be able to work the keyboard these days?

[Jo Freddie]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

He's 62, single and still has a full head of hair.

Which is all his own, he paid for every single strand of it.

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

Without saying whether I am used goods or not, my father told me to thank you for the above offer.

You just said it right there. Used goods it is.

I would be thrilled to take you up on that offer.

Used goods: CONFIRMED

Just one question? How strong is his heart still?

All True Chrstians™ have strong hearts. It takes a strong heart to suffer for His sake. The real question is: Do you have a strong back, strong legs, dexterous hands and no known allergies to household cleaning products?

[Miss B]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

You just said it right there. Used goods it is.



Used goods: CONFIRMED

Hmm, that might be why my father got excited when I told him about the offer.

The real question is: Do you have a strong back, strong legs, dexterous hands and no known allergies to household cleaning products?

My legs and back are strong from all the "housework" my father makes me do.

[Remy Lebeau]

Re: It's me, Miss B!

My legs and back are strong from all the "housework" my father makes me do.

Are you from Arkansas?