Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Greetings and Salutations!

First and foremost I'd just like to give a shout out to Jesus! I will try to keep my introduction brief as possible, as I know the brevity of life is as sacred as His word. "The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: because the spirit of the LORD bloweth upon it: surely the people is grass. The grass withereth, the flower fadeth: but the word of our God shall stand for ever." Isaiah 40:7-8, KJV

My name is Bill, and I hail from Des Moines, Iowa. I found Jesus the same way I found Waldo when I was a kid. I opened a book, pointed randomly on a page, and there it was right under my filthy fingernail. Jesus. Little did I know at the time that the words and ideas surrounding that name would forever change my life.

I have since cleaned my fingernails, "Wash yourselves; make yourselves clean; remove the evil of your deeds from before my eyes; cease to do evil" Isaiah 1:16, and burned all of my books involving that false idol Waldo. "Therefore, my beloved, flee from idolatry." 1 Corinthians 10:14

I attend the First Baptist Church of Greater Des Moines, and my favorite bible verse can be found in my signature below. Thank you for taking the time to read this!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Welcome to God's favorite forum, where death by sodomy is nearly unheard of.

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Faith_Machine]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Hey there Bill. I wasn't aware the Waldo was a false idol. I thought it was just a fun activity book for kids or something.

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Does this picture look like fun for children? http://www.flickr.com/photos/52819048@N00/163205280/

There are so many things wrong with just this section of the page in one of the many Waldo books, I don't even know where to begin!

This unmarried woman (no wedding ring, and also only one blanket) is exposing her bare breasts to the man with the Mikhail Gorbechev torso screaming "Take me now!" I'm sure I don't need to point out the multitudes of scripture that forbids sexual congress before marriage. (Acts 15:20; 1 Corinthians 5:1; 6:13, 18; 10:8; 2 Corinthians 12:21; Galatians 5:19; Ephesians 5:3; Colossians 3:5; 1 Thessalonians 4:3; Jude 7). Not to mention God only approves the sexual relationship between a husband and his wife (Hebrews 13:4).

This brings us to the couple who seem to be in the throes of passion directly above that, who are of different races. This is not only strictly forbidden (Deuteronomy 7:1-6), but also disgusting and abhorrent. And that is only ASSUMING they are married! (See above)

From here, we can almost see a redeeming factor. The man directly behind the breast-exposing woman with the massive erection seems to be readying himself to rape her. This is all good and swell for that man to proceed and then give the 50 shekels to her father (Deuteronomy 22:28-29), but he seems to be afflicted with the curse of midgetry. This well hung dwarf is just another impure blemish on this page of chaotic evil. (Leviticus 21:17-23) I won't even go into the man in orange jeans who is vigorously slamming his ham over all of this.

To top it all off, this image was uploaded to the website by username "gods4suckers". This practically proves that Where's Waldo? is the bible for liberal atheist communists and therefore reading them and playing Waldo's little game of promoting sin is a one way ticket to hell.

[Zechariah Smyth]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Bill, I was sceptical at first, but after this last post it does appear that you are indeed filled with God's Love(c) and aware of the many pitfalls and booby-traps that beset a True Christian(tm) who is trying to stay on that narrow path to Eternal Glory.

(Matthew 7:14) "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."



Tell us more about yourself! How many future Soldiers for Christ(tm) has your help meet grunted out for you?

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

I would also like to say thank you for the welcome. I've been a visitor to this site for many years, getting great inspiration from the True Christians™ of this forum. Your wisdom has brought me such joy over the years, I thought it would be pertinent to interact with your community, even if I remain unsaved trash. It's an honor to be in the same company of like minded individuals.

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Bill, I was sceptical at first, but after this last post it does appear that you are indeed filled with God's Love© and aware of the many pitfalls and booby-traps that beset a True Christian™ who is trying to stay on that narrow path to Eternal Glory.

(Matthew 7:14) "Because strait is the gate, and narrow is the way, which leadeth unto life, and few there be that find it."



Tell us more about yourself! How many future Soldiers for Christ™ has your help meet grunted out for you?

Yours in Christ,

Z. Smyth

As of this time and date, only two children have my wife and I bred, both not-sons. While my house is very well kept, I have not yet met a suitable mate for either of my daughters, ages 5 and 2. This site may yet be a further salvation in my life to solve that quandary as well. Thank you for your interest in my loin-spawn and the welcome to your grand community!

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Welcome, Bill! That was a wonderful analysis of the perversion that is "Where's Waldo's Weenie". In examining the image, I also noted a perverted elderly couple behind a screen . . but obviously exposed at the rear! Not to mention the Negro standing behind the endowed midget, leering, and eagerly awaiting his turn . . . or the cameo appearance by a drugged-out Janis Joplin toward the bottom left!

I admit I'd never really looked at "Where's Waldo" before. Now, I feel I must examine more, then prepare a sermon for my congregation on this evil!

Thank you so much for bringing this to our attention.

I have no doubt you are aware of the Godly Christian adventures of Pediabear, which the depraved porn-addicts at 4chan have perverted into "Pedobear". As if, they think, pedophiles would put a self-identifying "Hi, I rape children!" sticker on their cars!

Oh, wait, I guess they do:

[Bill R. Briscoe]

Re: Praise be to Him! Greetings to all Freehold citizens.

Oh Pediabear! I do love a good mystery, and the Mystery of the Disappearing Salami did not disappoint my or my family. I can only imagine what the bottom feeding catlicks on 4chan would do to desecrate such a wholesome icon as Pediabear.

The few times I've been there this week, in the bible section, I've seen naked teenage women willingly opening their legs for their fellow sodomites. I'm still working on a petition to send to the hosts of ***** to have a way to retrieve the addresses of these young vibrant women so that I may send them all bibles. It's time to close their legs and open their minds to Jesus!