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  • #1

    Hi!

    Hello!
    I live in the satanic land of Finland where I'm surrounded by eskimoes who don't really know that they are eskimoes, and the polar bears truly are slaves here.
    I hate it here, you can't imagine the ways these people praise the satan here, and know absolutely nothing about the Holy Bible or God in general.

    God bless America, the true country of God!

    I'm going to the local baptist church where the few enlightened go to here, and I'm a computer technician.

    My favorite bible verse is the following: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22)
    Tags: None
  • #2
    Re: Hi!

    Do they need people there to teach little children about Jesus?
    Bob's mom: "Bob is 'special' and unemployed but otherwise a catch!"

    John 20:29: "...blessed are they that have not seen, and yet have believed."

    Comment

    • #3
      Re: Hi!

      Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
      Hello!
      I live in the satanic land of Finland where I'm surrounded by eskimoes who don't really know that they are eskimoes, and the polar bears truly are slaves here.
      I hate it here, you can't imagine the ways these people praise the satan here, and know absolutely nothing about the Holy Bible or God in general.

      God bless America, the true country of God!

      I'm going to the local baptist church where the few enlightened go to here, and I'm a computer technician.

      My favorite bible verse is the following: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22)
      Glory, glory, GLORY!

      Finally, an introduction that wasn't a slap in the face of the Little Baby Jesus. You'd be surprised how many people come here and can't follow simple instructions.

      Tell me friend, what can we call you? How did you come to find Jesus in the wastelands of Finlandistan?

      Yours in Christ,

      Z. Smyth
      sigpic

      Comment

      • #4
        Re: Hi!

        [QUOTE=PraiserO;855966]I'm going to the local baptist church where the few enlightened go to here, and I'm a computer technician.[QUOTE]

        If you are a computer wizard how do you avoid the constant lure of Onanism?

        Jesus has touched me!
        1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

        Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

        Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

        Comment

        • #5
          Re: Hi!

          We are getting more and more people into our church every day so we are not currently in need of any instructioning, but I'll let you know when we do need such assistance.

          I don't feel the need for onanism, because I have God to guide me in such matters, he together with Jesus give me the faith and the strength to resist such satanic habits.

          Comment

          • #6
            Re: Hi!

            And I forgot to add that I despise the heathens who worship the catholic church, they are not the true christians.

            Comment

            • #7
              Re: Hi!

              Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
              Hello!
              I live in the satanic land of Finland where I'm surrounded by eskimoes who don't really know that they are eskimoes, and the polar bears truly are slaves here.
              I hate it here, you can't imagine the ways these people praise the satan here, and know absolutely nothing about the Holy Bible or God in general.

              God bless America, the true country of God!

              I'm going to the local baptist church where the few enlightened go to here, and I'm a computer technician.

              My favorite bible verse is the following: Wives, submit yourselves unto your own husbands, as unto the Lord. (Ephesians 5:22)
              What's name of your church, Nanook?

              If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

              If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

              You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

              Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
              Who Will Jesus Damn?

              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

              Comment

              • #8
                Re: Hi!

                I can't reveal my churche's name because the satanic country of Finland is banning and killing all christians at the moment! I'm in danger even when typing to this forums.

                Comment

                • #9
                  Re: Hi!

                  Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
                  I can't reveal my churche's name because the satanic country of Finland is banning and killing all christians at the moment! I'm in danger even when typing to this forums.
                  Jesus doesn't want wimps.

                  Ephesians 6:10-17 10Finally, my brethren, be strong in the Lord, and in the power of his might. 11Put on the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to stand against the wiles of the devil. 12For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world, against spiritual wickedness in high places. 13Wherefore take unto you the whole armour of God, that ye may be able to withstand in the evil day, and having done all, to stand. 14Stand therefore, having your loins girt about with truth, and having on the breastplate of righteousness; 15And your feet shod with the preparation of the gospel of peace; 16Above all, taking the shield of faith, wherewith ye shall be able to quench all the fiery darts of the wicked. 17And take the helmet of salvation, and the sword of the Spirit, which is the word of God:

                  Comment

                  • #10
                    Re: Hi!

                    I'm not listening to you! I will not throw my life in vain!

                    Comment

                    • #11
                      Re: Hi!

                      I have been freeing polar bears almost all my life now, and the Eskimoes, the satanic ones are really devilish and they cannot be beaten with manpower only! And if I wanted the Gods armour I would have to most likely move to the country which God truly has blessed, the USA! The best country in the world!

                      Glory!

                      Comment

                      • #12
                        Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
                        I have been freeing polar bears almost all my life now, and the Eskimoes, the satanic ones are really devilish and they cannot be beaten with manpower only! And if I wanted the Gods armour I would have to most likely move to the country which God truly has blessed, the USA! The best country in the world!

                        Glory!
                        I must confess to never having heard of 'freeing' and I'm an expert on gay slang.

                        Glory indeed. Glory hole, more like
                        Posted via Mobile Device
                        1 Corinthians 11:3 But I would have you know, that the head of every man is Christ; and the head of the woman is the man; and the head of Christ is God.

                        Revelation 22:15 For without are dogs, and sorcerers, and whoremongers, and murderers, and idolaters, and whosoever loveth and maketh a lie.

                        Leviticus 20:13 If a man also lie with mankind, as he lieth with a woman, both of them have committed an abomination: they shall surely be put to death; their blood shall be upon them.

                        Comment

                        • #13
                          Re: Hi!

                          Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
                          I'm not listening to you! I will not throw my life in vain!
                          If you're a Christian, then this life is just setting the stage for eternity.

                          Psalm 90:10 The days of our years are threescore years and ten; and if by reason of strength they be fourscore years, yet is their strength labour and sorrow; for it is soon cut off, and we fly away.

                          Originally posted by PraiserO View Post
                          I have been freeing polar bears almost all my life now,...
                          True Christians(tm) know that polar bears are for eating (and wearing), not freeing.

                          ...And if I wanted the Gods armour I would have to most likely move to the country which God truly has blessed, the USA!...
                          How dare you suggest there's a limit to God's power!

                          It's not like the heathens that infest your country are in iron chariots or something.




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