X
Collapse
 
  • Page of 1
  • Time
  • Show
Clear All
new posts
Previous template Next
  • LordIsMercy
    Unsaved trash
     
    • Mar 2012
    • 29
    #1

    Hello

    My name is Jacob Fortson.

    I live in Ohio in a white suburb lacking all black trash or hell-bound homosexuals!

    The bible verse of my choosing is:

    "For God shall bring every work into judgment, with every secret thing, whether it be good, or whether it be evil." Ecclesiastes 12:14


    I attend First Baptist Church of Milford, Ohio,


    I am excited to be here to assist my journey with Christ!
    Jeremiah 2:30 In vain have I smitten your children; they received no correction: your own sword hath devoured your prophets, like a destroying lion.
    Tags: None
    • Pastor Ezekiel
      Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
       
      • Sep 2006
      • 78556
      #2
      Re: Hello

      Welcome to God's favorite forum, Jacob. How old are you? You know Pastor Duttry? Did he ever tell you that he cheats at golf?

      Long story.

      If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

      If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

      You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

      Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.
      Who Will Jesus Damn?

      Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

      Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

      Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

        Comment

        • LordIsMercy
          Unsaved trash
           
          • Mar 2012
          • 29
          #3
          Re: Hello

          Yes, I know Pastor Duttry. How have you had the pleasure of his company?


          But I am a 31 year old male, currently single, but I am searching for a deserving woman to wed.
          Jeremiah 2:30 In vain have I smitten your children; they received no correction: your own sword hath devoured your prophets, like a destroying lion.

            Comment

            • Pastor Ezekiel
              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
               
              • Sep 2006
              • 78556
              #4
              Re: Hello

              Originally posted by LordIsMercy View Post
              But I am a 31 year old male, currently single, but I am searching for a deserving woman to wed.
              31 years old and still unmarried? What's wrong with you? You should be a grandfather by now!

              You're not a damned joo I hope.
              Who Will Jesus Damn?

              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                Comment

                • LordIsMercy
                  Unsaved trash
                   
                  • Mar 2012
                  • 29
                  #5
                  Re: Hello

                  Of course I'm not a damned joo!

                  Hence why I said "currently single." I am looking for wife number 3, and I have been blessed with 4 children, all of which are boys and my oldest is almost to the age of providing me with grandchildren!
                  Jeremiah 2:30 In vain have I smitten your children; they received no correction: your own sword hath devoured your prophets, like a destroying lion.

                    Comment

                    • Roberta
                      Anti La Leche League Organizer
                      True Christian™
                      • Jan 2008
                      • 1817
                      #6
                      Re: Hello

                      Hi Jake,

                      I am lookin", too. Would you PM me with some recent pics and your 2012 1040.

                      YIC,

                      Robbie
                      Last edited by Roberta; 03-19-2012, 02:34 AM. Reason: typo
                      Come climb my mountains.

                        Comment

                        • Roberta
                          Anti La Leche League Organizer
                          True Christian™
                          • Jan 2008
                          • 1817
                          #7
                          Re: Hello

                          Oh, the kids don't live with you, do they?
                          Come climb my mountains.

                            Comment

                            • LordIsMercy
                              Unsaved trash
                               
                              • Mar 2012
                              • 29
                              #8
                              Re: Hello

                              Would you be willing, even though I am still "unsaved trash" and not yet reached the True Christian™ level?

                              But yes, I keep my children close to me so I can make sure to beat the evil out of them if needed!
                              Jeremiah 2:30 In vain have I smitten your children; they received no correction: your own sword hath devoured your prophets, like a destroying lion.

                                Comment

                                • Rev. M. Rodimer
                                  Honorary True Christian™
                                  Forum Member
                                  • May 2008
                                  • 13996
                                  #9
                                  Re: Hello

                                  Originally posted by LordIsMercy View Post
                                  My name is Jacob Fortson.

                                  I live in Ohio in a white suburb lacking all black trash or hell-bound homosexuals!
                                  Why do you hate Negroes and think yourself superior to them? Are you a bigot?

                                  Where does God say in the Bible that you should hate Negroes? Chapter and verse, please.
                                  Bible boring? Nonsense!
                                  Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                                  You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                                    Comment

                                    Previous template Next
                                    Working...