[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: seeking guidance

Why are you here? You obviously just want to mock our most cherished beliefs to get your jollies.

Have you no shame? You mock God on a Sunday of all days.

You people make me sick, people like you arn't good enough to lick the piss from Jesus's fingers, gosh darn it

All the best.

[savedfromgrace]

Re: seeking guidance

I see you have been listening to the vile trash spewed from the heatens. For shame! Lies, all.

[savedfromgrace]

Re: seeking guidance

Sadly, it will be you in the lake of fire..... From heaven, I will piss on you to quench the flames.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: seeking guidance

I see you have been listening to the vile trash spewed from the heatens. For shame! Lies, all.

Listen buddy, that smart mouth of yours is gonna get you sent straight to Hell

Do you think this is a joke? We are helping Jesus save souls every day and do you do?

No doubt sat at home in yo momma's basement debasing your penile member with thoughts of sodomy rocking back and forth in your stinking lair of depravity till you reach culmination

1 Samuel 15:23 For rebellion is as the sin of witchcraft, and stubbornness is as iniquity and idolatry. Because thou hast rejected the word of the LORD, he hath also rejected thee from being king

YIC

[Pim Pendergast]

Re: seeking guidance

Sadly, it will be you in the lake of fire..... From heaven, I will piss on you to quench the flames.

I see you are unfamiliar with the proper use of the quote button, but I think you were addressing me. "The heart is deceitful above all things" (Jer 17:9). You have deceived yourself into thinking that you are bound for heaven, but you will be sorely disappointed on Judgement Day. But when you are burning in the lake of fire, I won't piss on you. I wouldn't do anything to ease your well-deserved torment. I might poop on you, though. Repent while there is still time. Even Catholics can become True Christians™, just look at the Reformation.

[savedfromgrace]

Re: seeking guidance

I can only hope all is not lost with your soul. I will pray for you. Perhaps I can convince the members of my church to gang-save you. Meanwhile, you would be advised to stock up on burn ointment. Yours in Christ.

[savedfromgrace]

Re: seeking guidance

I see you are unfamiliar with the proper use of the quote button, but I think you were addressing me. "The heart is deceitful above all things" (Jer 17:9). You have deceived yourself into thinking that you are bound for heaven, but you will be sorely disappointed on Judgement Day. But when you are burning in the lake of fire, I won't piss on you. I wouldn't do anything to ease your well-deserved torment. I might poop on you, though. Repent while there is still time. Even Catholics can become True Christians™, just look at the Reformation.

From our discourse, I feared it to be a hot key for the devil. As I said to Miss Niles, I will pray for you, but you are going to be way, way, down on the list. Yours in christ.

[Pim Pendergast]

Re: seeking guidance

From our discourse, I feared it to be a hot key for the devil. As I said to Miss Niles, I will pray for you, but you are going to be way, way, down on the list. Yours in christ.

You're not even on my prayer list. You're clearly wasting our time. You're not here to seek God.

[James Hutchins]

Re: seeking guidance

Jesus has touched me through the hands of our local priest. And I do feel the warmth of God.

You do know that is a crime in the US of A. It may be perfectly fine in Estonia or slantland, but we do not put up with priests that rape here. What was his name?

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: seeking guidance

I just found your site, and have a problem I hope you can help me with. When witnessing on the internet I try to spread the word of God's love by posting on forums that the commenters will be damned to eternal torment. On occasion, some may ask how this is relevant to their post. I of course, respond with scripture. So far, this has resulted only in suggestions that I perform acts of a sinful nature upon myself that are physically impossible, at least so far. Can you help?

This is called the INTRODUCTIONS section for a reason. Please tell us about yourself, your church, and your walk with Jesus.

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: seeking guidance

Sadly, it will be you in the lake of fire..... From heaven, I will piss on you to quench the flames.

Wow, a troll who claims to be Catholic, yet doesn't even understand Papist doctrine about Hell . . . that doctrine being that the Bible is wrong, and Hell does not exist as the Bible describes:

Pope Benedict speculated that the condemned might not be numerous, describing how thoroughly they would have to have destroyed themselves:

“Perhaps there are not so many who have destroyed themselves so completely, who are irreparable forever, who no longer have any element upon which the love of God can rest, who no longer have the slightest capacity to love within themselves. This would be hell.”

Purgatory offers hope to men with a “final willingness” to live according to God, the Pope said. “We need to be prepared, to be purified. This is our hope: even with so much filth in our soul, in the end the Lord gives us the possibility, He washes us finally with his goodness that comes from his cross. He thus makes us capable of living for Him forever.”

Emphasis added. Benedict insists upon the made-up "purgatory", because without it he must accept that nearly all are bound for eternal torment in God's Lake of Fire.

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: seeking guidance

Wow, a troll who claims to be Catholic, yet doesn't even understand Papist doctrine about Hell

Reverend, I don't think this troll understands much of anything. I suspect she's no more than 13, out of school for the summer, has no job or chores to do, was kicked off her X-box, so came here to kill time.