[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

My salon "Biblical Fashion" is used for the glory of God, PRAISE BE HALLELUJAH!! ( 1Cor 11:15 - But if a woman have long hair, it is a glory to her: for her hair is given her for a covering.)

I do not allow the wicked gossip common in heathen hair salons. In True Christian fashion (not a pun) I conceal numerous secrets within the confines of my salon. Proverbs 11:13 - A talebearer revealeth secrets: but he that is of a faithful spirit concealeth the matter.

Rest assured my brother in , this is a Godly business, above reproach, and all discipline of girls (when necessary) is done in a back room to conceal the matter in biblical fashion (not a pun) per Proverbs 11:13.

As for a man needing only a #2, which is 1/4" of hair, that is usually correct. However, when a man takes a nazarite vow as described in Numbers 6:5 - All the days of the vow of his separation there shall no razor come upon his head: until the days be fulfilled, in the which he separateth himself unto the Lord, he shall be holy, and shall let the locks of the hair of his head grow.

[Freddy Osborne]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

I never considered a beauty salon a real business. I thought it was like a hobby where a bunch of hens sat around every Saturday clucking about each other's bizness:

http://youtu.be/TwURzDXb8zw

Regardless, it is perculiar when a man takes up such things and interior design. I assumed former fruitcakes would have more manly interests.

[Mother Of Seven]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Women can't run businesses. Only men are capable of that. So men have to run women's beauty salons.

[Freddy Osborne]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Yes, hair styling is my line of work as commanded by the Lord. 2 Thessalonians 3:10 For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.

And the interior design stuff?

I bid you a cautious welcome. But I am concerned about your choice of profession and interests.

Yes, God has commanded us to work but hair salons and interior design sounds like something off Bravo or HGTV.

Why would a man need a haircut with anything more than a #2 guard?

[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Am I mistaken or do you own a beauty salon?? And a curling iron?

Yes, hair styling is my line of work as commanded by the Lord. 2 Thessalonians 3:10 For even when we were with you, this we commanded you, that if any would not work, neither should he eat.

[Freddy Osborne]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Indeed Brother...that advice comes not a moment too soon!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?p=1087664#post1087664

Am I mistaken or do you own a beauty salon?? And a curling iron?

[Witch Hammer]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Indeed Brother...that advice comes not a moment too soon!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?p=1087664#post1087664

Gird your loins, Brother!

Remember, you are not sporting that formidable erection for the benefit of the rutting cow being seeded, but for the Glory of God™ and the begetting of many sons, who will in turn plunge head-long into that pink (or so I've heard) abyss in His name, when the time comes! Fear no evil, brother, and Christ have your back!

[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Glory! What a remarkable testimony! Be warned though, friend...when you finally find the right woman to rape and take to wife as per Deuteronomy 22:28-29, I implore you to wear nose and ear plugs, and a blindfold. The unknowable horror of that which lurks catty-corner to her pimply, pock-marked buttocks will surely leave you palsied and gibbering with madness, should you look upon it with the naked eye. Go into battle prepared, young soldier, I would hate to see you relapse back into rank cornholery.

Indeed Brother...that advice comes not a moment too soon!

http://www.landoverbaptist.net/showthread.php?p=1087664#post1087664

[Witch Hammer]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Praise be, glory hallelujah!

The good Lord called me out of the depths of the abominable homo-gay lifestyle. (It was a horrible decision I made at a young age, but praise God Almighty, I have seen the light.)

I have confessed my sin, and received the salvation that can only come from the redeeming life-blood shed upon the cross . I was baptized recently and I just praise the heck out of the Holy Ghost for leading me here to the one true church.

So happy to be in the light, and armed with my patent leather KJV, I will now dedicate my new life to explaining the hell bound nature of sin to other sissy boys and win their souls over to the kingdom.

Glory! What a remarkable testimony! Be warned though, friend...when you finally find the right woman to rape and take to wife as per Deuteronomy 22:28-29, I implore you to wear nose and ear plugs, and a blindfold. The unknowable horror of that which lurks catty-corner to her pimply, pock-marked buttocks will surely leave you palsied and gibbering with madness, should you look upon it with the naked eye. Go into battle prepared, young soldier, I would hate to see you relapse back into rank cornholery.

[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Dear Billy;

Please regale us with stories of your former debauched lifestyle. It infuriates satan when his evils are exposed to the light of day. Don't skimp on the details, I assure you that I've heard it all before.

--Pastor Ezekiel

Well then DEVIL BE DAMNED! Let it be known that Satan's satanical gayness permeates deep into the realms of the papists. Those confessional booths are often called "2-fers" by those insiders who enjoy debauchery with the priest and simply confess it as they do it. This is known as a "zero guilt-time" process because you are cleansed as you go. "I'm donkey-punching the priest!" as you do it....and bam you are forgiven that moment.

Pastor Zeke, I am so ashamed...But if the Homo-fag agenda is stifled by it, then far be it from me to withhold information!

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Dear Billy;

Welcome to God's favorite forum. I praise Jesus every day (and I hope you do too) for freeing queers like you from the horrible fate of being satan's favorite party ewe for all eternity down in hell. Please regale us with stories of your former debauched lifestyle. It infuriates satan when his evils are exposed to the light of day. Don't skimp on the details, I assure you that I've heard it all before.

If you'd like to find out more about Landover Baptist Church, please read THIS thread created especially for new posters.

If you have a question, use the "search" function before posting it. Most likely it is being discussed somewhere on this Godly forum. Please don't waste God's precious bandwidth.

You will keep a respectful tongue in your head whenever addressing your betters, which includes all True Christians™. Failure to do so, or any attempt at inciting debate or mockery of God's Divine Plan, can and will result in the suspension of your posting privileges.

Your rights on this forum are listed HERE. If you feel that any of these rights have been violated, please don't hesitate to contact a Pastor at once.

YIC,

--Pastor Ezekiel

[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

I am so pleased that you have gone back on your decision to be gaywise. Jesus really hates fags (as your sig so correctly states).

It must have been Hell being an anal enthusiast, spitting at Jesus every day.

Now that you have chosen to be normal again, what are you doing for Jesus?

YIC

Well Doctor, now that I am normal again, I am serving the heck outta Jesus Christ by ministering to others who are still trapped by satan in that horrific lifestyle. I have started an acountibility hotline that fags can call to confess their sinful desires and receive prayer to overcome them.

Just last night we received a call from a queerfag that was having a VERY HARD night. He was obviously under attack from the enemy, so I recruited another brother as required by Mathew 18:16 and paid him a visit. When we arrived at his apartment, we laid hands upon him and prayed VIGOROUSLY until the demons were expelled from his body onto the floor.

He began to understand just how much Good God Almighty really does hate him. He cried. The demons then tried to enter my brother from the accountability group, but again we prayed them out. We were all filled with the Holy Ghost and spake in tongues. This morning when we departed, I could see a glimmer of hope in the fag man's eye, as he had begun to see that he does not have to choose that horrifying life of destruction, which destroys good hetero families each and every time he sexes it up for Satan.

One fag at a time, Christ is marching on.

[Dr Laurence Niles]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Basilissa-

I'm not one to rush into things...I mean, I used to rush into ....um...things, butt now I am a new creature and I have been looking for the right woman to marry and have many many children with. Proper Christian woman is not easy to find, and I won't settle for anything less than God's best for me.

I am so pleased that you have gone back on your decision to be gaywise. Jesus really hates fags (as your sig so correctly states).

It must have been Hell being an anal enthusiast, spitting at Jesus every day.

Now that you have chosen to be normal again, what are you doing for Jesus?

YIC

[William Taester]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Basilissa-

I'm not one to rush into things...I mean, I used to rush into ....um...things, butt now I am a new creature and I have been looking for the right woman to marry and have many many children with. Proper Christian woman is not easy to find, and I won't settle for anything less than God's best for me.

[Basilissa]

Re: I prayed away the gay!

Hello, dear, and to the Godliest corner of the internet!

I am happy to see a sinner who decided to sin no more. Are you happily married now? If so, how many sons do you have?