[Roland]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Friend, he will Santa Claus, he will make a plastic from magic, which will a renewable resource.

Hello Un,

Please cite a source for this (what I think is an) assumption. The Bible would do, if you have any other sources that might undermine your case even better, please include them.

Kind regards,

Roland

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Ahem, "Santa", if I were a liberal, I would point out that many plastics are made from oil, which is a non-renewal resource.

Friend, he will Santa Claus, he will make a plastic from magic, which will a renewable resource.

[handmaiden]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

But I deliver some actual bright things of plastic. I reflect the happiness of seeing others enjoy what we can give. Instead of promises, I give plastic toys.

Ahem, "Santa", if I were a liberal, I would point out that many plastics are made from oil, which is a non-renewal resource.


Supposedly, you used to make wholesome, wooden toys. I'm sure than when Jesus had leftover wood from His carpentry projects, He made toys for some of His little step-cousins in Nazareth. Maybe He also made buttons for people's cloaks and togas, assuming that they had buttons in those days.


Archanely Yours,
Handmaiden

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Un, my child! Take this as a lesson, the lesson that Jesus never learned, when I tried to show him how to be nice with some well-chosen gifts. He was too high on the sword in his mouth and the army of two-hundred-million-something angels to purge the land of those who were sometimes nice but did not have the faith. He is nothing without the faith, you know, he would simply vanish in a puff of logic.

I do not care of the faith. You don't have to shout out that you believe in fairies and clap your hands to make me real. I deliver. I deliver toys to kids. You and Jesus deliver kids to war zones. I deliver Power Rangers and Teenage Turtles to boys. You and Jesus deliver boys to the front. I deliver Ponies and in an increasing number Power Rangers to girls. You and Jesus deliver girls to exhausting labor in the fields and to childbearing to save them, and in an increasing number to the front.

The kids treat the toys as if they were real atomic bombs, and you and your kind treat atomic bombs as if they were toys. You still live. You can still be nice and get the sweetest Swiss chocolate that I can deliver. Jesus is no longer here to answer for the stuff done in his name. I like you more. I'll give you an extra lollipop this year.

I also give you this song

...ho ho ho...

Friend I am cry at this song. It is beautiful and very sad. I am now make it play at state marches and parades.

However, I make it clear, I do not send children to war zone. That has been the action of capitalist government in the past in every manufactured war that they have cause in the name of imperialism, they put out propaganda glorifying this war, so that boys as young of 16 and sometimes younger will sign up for make a conscript. What you hear about DPRK make a conscript for a young soldier is nothing but lie and propaganda. What you see here is example of psychological projection where the subject projects a negative judgment of character of themselves onto others.

Friend - Do not believe on blind faith every thing you hear in a radio, in a television, in a newspaper. This is the same lamestream media that is claim Nelson Mandela, Mahatma Gandhi, Martin Luther King and many other great peoples to be terrorists. Make a research. Thank.

[Santa Claus]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

That's power. To give your love and devotion to Jesus is to share that power (John 14:12). To give your love and devotion to Santa is to become one of those weird middle aged ladies who wears festive shirts adorned with birds or cats, bordered by flowers or snowflakes, and ribbons with just enough glitter and bling to catch your eye and make you squint with concentration as your mind wrestles with the impulse to figure out the riddle and at the same time save itself from such an hideous image.

Sweet Mary! You're confused. Jesus was conceived out of the necessity to give reason to all the gore and perceived random chaos that ruled the world. He was conjured to control the growing teenage mind and to keep it in your infantile state. Our friend Mr. Undy-Dundy was conceived by a biological act of dominating power to control the thoughts of a nation and to keep them happy in their misery - a very oriental way of doing things. Now the followers of these happy fellows identify with them and think that they share the power of the leader and give him their love and devotion. They channel this love to outsource their hunger to dominate others.

You're confused by all this. Ok, I admit, I was also conceived to control the minds of children to be nice and not naughty. But I deliver some actual bright things of plastic. I reflect the happiness of seeing others enjoy what we can give. Instead of promises, I give plastic toys. My power is not in the breaking of walls but in letting go of things. A God can easily die for anyone as he knows he can reconstruct himself. Jesus chose this easy way when he gave his life in subsequent self-glorification. He glorified him in himself and straightway glorified him. Much like Mr. Undies here. You might be right about the blood sugar. I'm mixing these two up. It is a greater deed to buy a nice cup of coffee and offer it to a stranger or to a friend.

You're confused but you're not very naughty. Your chimney is well-kept and of suitable diameter. I'm going to deliver you a nice cup of coffee for Christmas. Not because of those nice chim-chimeney-chimenee things but because I can and because while you don't believe in me you still talk to me. I'd give it regardless, of course.

Btw, I don't like Rudolf the Red-nosed Reindeer song. He was an awful leader when he was pulling my sleigh. Much too smug. Dasher, Dancer, Prancer, Vixen, Comet, Cupid, Donner and Blitzen are also long gone. I loved them. I loved Rudolf, too, actually. Just don't like the song. Perfectly normal. The nose. It was. Rosita leads the pack now and she's awesome. When her time comes, she's willing to give her body to the elfs as a roast. They'll eat her for remembrance of the good work she did for you all. I hope this helps, dear!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Un, my child! Take this as a lesson, the lesson that Jesus never learned, when I tried to show him how to be nice with some well-chosen gifts. He was too high on the sword in his mouth and the army of two-hundred-million-something angels to purge the land of those who were sometimes nice but did not have the faith. He is nothing without the faith, you know, he would simply vanish in a puff of logic.

I do not care of the faith. You don't have to shout out that you believe in fairies and clap your hands to make me real. I deliver. I deliver toys to kids. You and Jesus deliver kids to war zones. I deliver Power Rangers and Teenage Turtles to boys. You and Jesus deliver boys to the front. I deliver Ponies and in an increasing number Power Rangers to girls. You and Jesus deliver girls to exhausting labor in the fields and to childbearing to save them, and in an increasing number to the front.

The kids treat the toys as if they were real atomic bombs, and you and your kind treat atomic bombs as if they were toys. You still live. You can still be nice and get the sweetest Swiss chocolate that I can deliver. Jesus is no longer here to answer for the stuff done in his name. I like you more. I'll give you an extra lollipop this year.

Perhaps that diabetes has affected your ancient brain, Santa dear, because you're confused. Jesus doesn't need people to shout their belief. He can see right straight into our hearts and know for sure whether or not we have faith (Jeremiah 17:10). This benefits those people who are too shy to shout out loud, or who have lost their tongues in accidents. Of course it backfires on those people who do shout out their faith but in their heart of hearts their love for Jesus is mercenary only.

In any case, your offer to pay the higher reward for affection won't work here, dear. Jesus has been working miracles for dozens of centuries, everything from bringing people back from the dead to feeding a stadium sized crowd out of a lunchbox to razing a city with simple band instruments. Think about it, dear. Ancient city walls don't fall with trumpets. Jericho was an inside job. That's power. To give your love and devotion to Jesus is to share that power (John 14:12). To give your love and devotion to Santa is to become one of those weird middle aged ladies who wears festive shirts adorned with birds or cats, bordered by flowers or snowflakes, and ribbons with just enough glitter and bling to catch your eye and make you squint with concentration as your mind wrestles with the impulse to figure out the riddle and at the same time save itself from such an hideous image.

[Santa Claus]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

Un, my child! Take this as a lesson, the lesson that Jesus never learned, when I tried to show him how to be nice with some well-chosen gifts. He was too high on the sword in his mouth and the army of two-hundred-million-something angels to purge the land of those who were sometimes nice but did not have the faith. He is nothing without the faith, you know, he would simply vanish in a puff of logic.

I do not care of the faith. You don't have to shout out that you believe in fairies and clap your hands to make me real. I deliver. I deliver toys to kids. You and Jesus deliver kids to war zones. I deliver Power Rangers and Teenage Turtles to boys. You and Jesus deliver boys to the front. I deliver Ponies and in an increasing number Power Rangers to girls. You and Jesus deliver girls to exhausting labor in the fields and to childbearing to save them, and in an increasing number to the front.

The kids treat the toys as if they were real atomic bombs, and you and your kind treat atomic bombs as if they were toys. You still live. You can still be nice and get the sweetest Swiss chocolate that I can deliver. Jesus is no longer here to answer for the stuff done in his name. I like you more. I'll give you an extra lollipop this year.

I also give you this song

...ho ho ho...

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Ho Ho HO!

What do you think I've been distributing to the U.S. leaders for the past 70 years? My ways are equal and I will judge, what the most suitable gift is according to the ways of each and everyone. There have been quite a few naughty leaders in the West, as well! I deliver but I do not always deliver what the recipient asks for!



Let's make this the Best Christmas EVER!

Ho ho ho! Merry Christmas!

[Santa Claus]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

It... isn't? How will I defend my country from U.S. imperialism?

Ho Ho HO!

What do you think I've been distributing to the U.S. leaders for the past 70 years? My ways are equal and I will judge, what the most suitable gift is according to the ways of each and everyone. There have been quite a few naughty leaders in the West, as well! I deliver but I do not always deliver what the recipient asks for!



Let's make this the Best Christmas EVER!

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Ho Ho Ho!

Aren't you adorable when you're angry! I try not to provoke the children to anger or they will be discouraged. Why oh why do the kids rage and imagine vain things? Your interest in nuclear physics must be encouraged, not dismissed. I remember very well that Jesus never fancied the Little Scientist Kit I got him in 5 CE, although it had all the best stuff: the Antikythera device construction manual, an astrolabe and even Heron's aeolipile! Probably too much bronze parts for that family who mostly tried to get wood. It's so cute to see kids playing with their lab toys.

OK, I deliver. You can expect one of these in your little pink stocking (the second from the left) on Christmas morning, darling boy!



My good friend from this forum, the young Mr. Un Undy-Dundyboy also got one from me a few years ago and he's still going ballistic with it (he still thinks it's the real deal)! Have fun, Alvin and Merry Christmas!! HO HO HO!!!

It... isn't? How will I defend my country from U.S. imperialism?

[Santa Claus]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

That is a violation of my rights under the Second Amendment of the Constitution. That is un-American. Further, I am uninterested in your pathetic bribe offer. I don't care for Alvin and The Chipmunks and I probably shouldn't be trying to communicate with some kind of demon anyway.

Ho Ho Ho!

Aren't you adorable when you're angry! I try not to provoke the children to anger or they will be discouraged. Why oh why do the kids rage and imagine vain things? Your interest in nuclear physics must be encouraged, not dismissed. I remember very well that Jesus never fancied the Little Scientist Kit I got him in 5 CE, although it had all the best stuff: the Antikythera device construction manual, an astrolabe and even Heron's aeolipile! Probably too much bronze parts for that family who mostly tried to get wood. It's so cute to see kids playing with their lab toys.

OK, I deliver. You can expect one of these in your little pink stocking (the second from the left) on Christmas morning, darling boy!



My good friend from this forum, the young Mr. Un Undy-Dundyboy also got one from me a few years ago and he's still going ballistic with it (he still thinks it's the real deal)! Have fun, Alvin and Merry Christmas!! HO HO HO!!!

[Alvin Moss]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Alvin, darling boy! Why do you ignore me? We used to be good friends. And, no... I cannot bring you any actual nukes. No way!

Instead, you'll be getting the Alvin & The Chipmunks CD

That is a violation of my rights under the Second Amendment of the Constitution. That is un-American. Further, I am uninterested in your pathetic bribe offer. I don't care for Alvin and The Chipmunks and I probably shouldn't be trying to communicate with some kind of demon anyway.

[Santa Claus]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Indeed, Sister. This Danish knock-off of a medieval Bosnian bishop has no significant powers. Dropping down a chimney while the family sleeps? That's not impressive, that's creepy. At least when Jesus watches every thing I do, He knows everything I think, too, so He knows that in my heart I'm doing the right thing even if it does result in tears or bruises on my children or husband. Santa can only see what we do, but He cannot search our hearts like a supernatural NSA, able to peek at things we hide from each other. Only Jesus can do that.

Mary, Mary, Mary! You were my precious little Princess with your curly locks and your nice tiara of the best plastics! I got you the little lamb, remember? He followed you everywhere! I'd get you another but I have to admit that Book of Mutton Recipies was not one of my best gift ideas.

I tried looking into people's thoughts once but I did not like what I saw. Actually, I was never too much bothered by the thoughts they had, it is what they do and say that causes the grief and despair. I stopped that mind-reading. It was vanity! Desperate attempts to find out if everyone loved me! Vanity! I no longer care if people believe in me. If they are not naughty, I deliver!

But Mary! You've been nice this year! I'm sure you'll like the Jesus origami kit.



No more lambs but perhaps a goat. Be careful. It eats origami paper.

[Marshal Kim Jong-un]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

You're so-o-o-o cute aren't you! I have a sudden urge to change your didy! Georgie boy died in 1950, btw! Actually, it was I who gave him the Nobel prize for Christmas! But you are cute! You're Santa's Little Boy, aren't you. Or course you are! My Un-Dun Baby boy! OK. You'll have a Hershey bar before you go to the camp! But. Just. One!

I deliver! Observe and learn!

Glory to you, Santa Claus! Merry Christmas!

[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: ASK SANTA! MAKE YOUR WISHES COME TRUE!

Okay "Santa", what gives? The notion that you can see what everybody is doing at all times is ridiculous. Only Jesus can do that . . .Or possibly Satan. The Bible is a little unclear on the exact extent of Satan's powers.

In the Gospel of Matthew, Satan was able to fly Jesus up to a really tall mountain (withOUT any reindeer) and show Him all the kingdoms in the whole world (more proof that the earth is flat), Then, Satan offered Jesus His pick of the litter to own if Jesus would just worship him. Jesus refused, of course. And that just shows that Satan is the god of this world, even though God is the God of the whole universe.

Indeed, Sister. This Danish knock-off of a medieval Bosnian bishop has no significant powers. Dropping down a chimney while the family sleeps? That's not impressive, that's creepy. At least when Jesus watches every thing I do, He knows everything I think, too, so He knows that in my heart I'm doing the right thing even if it does result in tears or bruises on my children or husband. Santa can only see what we do, but He cannot search our hearts like a supernatural NSA, able to peek at things we hide from each other. Only Jesus can do that.