What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

I had a wonderful CHRISTmas. I made a turkey with all the trimmings and Pastor Zeke came over early with his presents and we had a toast to JESUS' Birthday with some very old wine. Then we opened presents.

Anyway, he got me a new male nigra servant (since he fired the last one for stealing pies cooling on my windowsill) and a beautiful gift basket with some bubble bath and stuff.

THANK YOU ZEKE and HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!!!

[Janine Walker]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I got a first edition




Also, was it scented bubble bath? My dad makes me take scented bubble baths when he's feeling down because how excited I become makes him happier!

Merry CHRISTmas, Janine Walker

[Vavoline Johnson]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I had a wonderful CHRISTmas. I made a turkey with all the trimmings and Pastor Zeke came over early with his presents and we had a toast to JESUS' Birthday with some very old wine. Then we opened presents.

Anyway, he got me a new male nigra servant since he fired the last one for sniffing my bike seat and a beautiful gift basket with some bubble bath and stuff.

THANK YOU ZEKE and HAPPY BIRTHDAY JESUS!!!

Oh lawd Miz Daisy, dat be the best present from da Pasta, yet!
Is he a house Nigro or a field hand?
If he don't work out, Cleevon got a cousin from Haiti dat need the work and he is jist about over his cholera and it shouldn't be catchin no mo

[James Hutchins]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

We had a typically modest holiday. In keeping with a humble home, each child got a single present. The girls each got pie pans, the boys of driving age got new cars, the young ones got new dirt bikes. Mrs. Hutchins got a new buckt for pig slopping. I had to get my own present. I got an second hand Ford, a beater really, a fixer upper.

[jennabenna]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I don't celebrate christmas. The solstice was wonderful, though, and my heart still celebrates. Not so much gift giving though. My mother gave me a Bible, a nice one bound in artificial dead cow skin, because sweet as she is, she still hasn't given up on my soul. We drank an excellent homemade wassail, care of my friend Frieda, that was gingery and delightful. And the Yule log burned bright. All in all, a lovely holiday season it is.

[WinnerNotSinner]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

My mother gave me a Bible, a nice one bound in artificial dead cow skin, because sweet as she is, she still hasn't given up on my soul.

That's funny, because my son LOST a similar Bible recently.
Some thief thought they would play a sick joke and replace his holy book with some filthy magazines featuring scantily clad men. This is not the first time my son has been victim of such attacks, there was a similar incident with disgusting DVD's being planted in his school bag without him even knowing.

I'm not suggesting anything, but I know your type steal more property than you have hot dinners.

[Brother Temperance]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I don't celebrate christmas. The solstice was wonderful, though, and my heart still celebrates. Not so much gift giving though. My mother gave me a Bible, a nice one bound in artificial dead cow skin, because sweet as she is, she still hasn't given up on my soul.

What does an artificial cow look like?

[Rev. M. Rodimer]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

My congregation all chipped in and got me a really nice card. It plays "Hark the Herald Angels Sing" when you open it!

Yeah . . . great card . . . it's really nice to see how much people really love you and what a profound impact you make in their lives.

More importantly, I got the birth of our Savior, who accepted temporary punishment for my pre-Christian sins two thousand years before I was born, so I won't have to receive infinite punishment for them after I'm dead. GLORY!

At least Jesus loves me.

[jennabenna]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

What does an artificial cow look like?

Faux leather, Brother Saltine.

[jennabenna]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

That's funny, because my son LOST a similar Bible recently.
Some thief thought they would play a sick joke and replace his holy book with some filthy magazines featuring scantily clad men. This is not the first time my son has been victim of such attacks, there was a similar incident with disgusting DVD's being planted in his school bag without him even knowing.

I'm not suggesting anything, but I know your type steal more property than you have hot dinners.

And you, do you think I would fly across the pacific ocean and half of the united states just to steal your bible? That would be a tad ridiculous, don't you think? I only ever go to three places in the U.S. anyway. San Francisco, Berkley, and Lincoln, Nebraska. To visit my mother.

[James Dewitt]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I did not get anything,, but Jesus loves me

[BunnyBabe21]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I got a DVD player and a leather jacket and super skinny Jeans!

[jennabenna]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

And you, do you think I would fly across the pacific ocean and half of the united states just to steal your bible? That would be a tad ridiculous, don't you think? I only ever go to three places in the U.S. anyway. San Francisco, Berkley, and Lincoln, Nebraska. To visit my mother.

Oh, and to go to the Lincoln Gay Pride festival. Not as fun as the californian ones, but it has some hometown value for me. And the children's area was great this year. My old middle school art teacher was watching over it, and there were these really great bead necklaces for prizes on the games. I was kind of jealous of the eight year olds there.

[AngelClark]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I got a double heart necklace and earrings from my children, a vanilla scented candle, flowered nightlight figure, MP3 player and from my Husband a Verizon 5-spot wireless broadband modem. Merry Christmas indeed

[Lycia The Repentant]

Re: What Did You Get for CHRISTmas?

I did not get anything,, but Jesus loves me

Brother, did you forget about the present I gave you? I know it didn't cost me anything, but I thought it was a great present nevertheless.

I got this lovely ring from my employer, Brother James. Isn't it lovely?