[JennyD]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Sister Victory Over Sex, I'm sure your hot date with Zeke your secret man will go swimmingly. The pot roast, the bacon . . . just be sure to add some doughnuts for dessert, I hear he loves him some creme-filled long johns!

Most of all, have fun and be yourself, dear!

[Rev. Jim Osborne]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Being a rather corpulent man myself, may I offer a few cooking tips before the special man arrives?

• DON'T drain the bacon grease! Use it as a gravy to smother your bacon with. It's much better that way.
• Use real butter, not margarine. The serving size is one stick of butter per person, so for your dinner, have two.
• As Sister Jenny pointed out, Sugar-coated doughnuts would be an excellent choice for dessert, especially with him being an officer of the law.

I really hope you two kids hit it off tonight! I'll be praying to Jesus that you two love birds find the right spark!

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

What ever happened to "honoring" your savage jungle ancestors? I can promise you that they didn't live on brussels sprouts or any other rabbit food.

God wants us to eat meat!

You are such a thoughtful Chaperone. Don't let those silly kids do anything we wouldn't do.

Good luck Sister Victory! Let us know how it turns out!

[JennyD]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Sister Victory, I only just realized that your date was with good Officer Richards.

Are you sure he knew what time to be there? I saw him running a police checkpoint at the main gates around dinnertime. He said they were looking for a crazy Negress pretending to be a "Professor", and that he'd be there all night.

Um, does that mean you and Pastor Ezekiel were left all alone for all that time? And from BTB's post, it looks like he's still not home . . .

[SUV]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

I'll be there 20 minutes early, to watch you Pray.

I'll be there 20 minutes before that in the case of a catfight Brewing.

(Now I ain't one to gossip, so you didn't hear that from me!)

[Bethany Covington]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Please forgive me Sister Victory for my unchristian, unkind and snarky remarks. Of course the Lord loves you and finds you beautiful in your heart and on the outside.
Brand gave me a good spanking as punishment and I hope you can find it in your heart to forgive me!

[JennyD]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Sister Victory, how was your date?

[Lorraine]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

God hates fatties.

Who says that has GOD told you HE/SHE has a problem with persons who are over weight? Please quote scripture to justify your decision. What gives you the right to pontificate on this issue.

[Johnnyboy]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Who says that has GOD told you HE/SHE has a problem with persons who are over weight? Please quote scripture to justify your decision. What gives you the right to pontificate on this issue.

Hello Lorraine,

What brings you to our happy community? Are you a True Christian? Are you married? What church do you attend? Do you read the King James Bible? Do you know how to filet catfish?

Thanks,
Johnny Ray James

[VictoryOS]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Ladies, I am pleased to say that our date was very successful! We had a lot of fun in town and the pot roast was big enough to feed us both. I was a little concerned about the amount of fat that the bacon created, but Mr. Richards didn't seem to mind at all. He just sopped the grease up with his garlic bread and ate it all down! It's nice to cook for someone who doesn't complain.

After dinner he asked me to give him a foot rub. Now I know what to get him for his birthday - odor eaters and some foot powder! I think I did a good enough job. He wore those big dark glasses the whole time so I can't be sure. At one point, I think he fell asleep. My hands were cramping and I thought it would be a good time to take a break. As soon as I stopped though, he snorted and sat up. So I went back to the foot rub. He works so hard at such a stressful job, of course he needs a good foot rub now and then!

So overall our evening went well. I don't think I scared him away.

[Daisy Mae Johnson]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Ohhhh Sister Victory, it all sounds so promising!

Invite him over tomorrow night for our Wednesday Cake in a Mug night. We will make sure yours are the best! If this won't get him to fall in love with you I don't know what will. I'll bring over some coffee mugs with hearts on them. That will send subliminal love messages and you can say some kind of clever toast and us LOL's will wander off in to the garden or something.

Good job on the foot rub! I'm sure that got him thinking about a wonderful creature you would be to come home to after a hard day on the "beat". Well, that and your wonderful home cooking!

It's looking like this could be your year Sister V! I'm so excited for you I can hardly stand it!!!

[jmarie56]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Well, Who asked you? I am true Christian and sorry, you're 100% wrong! God hates fatties. He doesn't care how nicely you dress, how clean your house is or if you're a good cook or not. First and foremost he wants us to be attractive with a good figure. One can never expect to trap, I mean attract a good Christian man when she looks like Jabba the Hut dressed in a fashion by Omar the tent maker!

Your absdolutely crazy if god didnt like fat people why did he create some people naturally fat?

[Bethany Covington]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Who says that has GOD told you HE/SHE has a problem with persons who are over weight? Please quote scripture to justify your decision. What gives you the right to pontificate on this issue.

Listen to me, unsaved trash....I do not want to highjack this thread but you who is so quick to judge, I apologized and asked for forgiveness. It is up to the Lord and Ms Victory to do the forgiving

[Bethany Covington]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Your absdolutely crazy if god didnt like fat people why did he create some people naturally fat?

One more time.....I apologized, now get back to the Waffle House. Floriduh is in need of more crap food!

[Lorraine]

Re: HELP! I need advice. Ladies ONLY!

Hello Lorraine,

What brings you to our happy community? Are you a True Christian? Are you married? What church do you attend? Do you read the King James Bible? Do you know how to filet catfish?

Thanks,
Johnny Ray James

I was guided here by God
Yes
Yes
Our local Baptist Church
Yes
No but I do gut, skin and joint rabbit, hare, edible birds and deer. Can you do this?

Anything else?

I thought only ladies were being asked to comment on this thread Johnnyboy. Is there something you'd like to tell us?