[Mary Etheldreda]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

What in heavens name is wrong with you, strumpet, and why is your impotent man whoring you out to turkey basters?

Watch out for her, Brother. I've been praying for her and the Holy Spirit tells me her "husband" is another woman and they're simply paying gay men to masturbate in their bathroom so they can infuse her womb with demonic seed and populate the earth with enough Sodomites to build a human bridge to Thailand, pick up a few she-male boys, and invade Russia.

[Des]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

My name is Amber. I have been married a year. We are struggling to have children, because of my health conditions. I'm fine with going to the fertility doctor, and getting my firizre to get to do something about this yearning. We are very much in love. I don't get "punished" as you all call it, but God still loves, and blesses us.

What in heavens name is wrong with you, strumpet, and why is your impotent man whoring you out to turkey basters? You are obviously no Christian, because any True Christian™ woman would have already turned to the Bible and utilized God's Perfect Plan outlined in Genesis 30 for conception. Here is a two word hint for you, harlot. Mandrake root.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

My name is Amber. I have been married a year. We are struggling to have children, because of my health conditions. I'm fine with going to the fertility doctor, and getting my firizre to get to do something about this yearning. We are very much in love. I don't get "punished" as you all call it, but God still loves, and blesses us.

Please make a thread of your own in the "Introductions" section of the forum, so that we can properly greet you. Tell us about yourself, your church, and how you came to find Jesus.

And if you're here to flame us, better take a look at THIS before making an even bigger ass out of yourself.

I will pray that the Holy Spirit enter you and chase the demons out of your rectum and let Jesus fill you with His Grace. If you use your God-given free will to reject Christ and His temporary death on the cross for my sins, then you are sending yourself to hellfire.

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

Brother, fertility doctors are also severely deranged perverts...the act of "cleaving unto" is disturbing enough without having some little creep darting around trying to manually transfer jism to the woman's unclean zone.

[Elmer G. White]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

My name is Amber. I have been married a year. We are struggling to have children, because of my health conditions. I'm fine with going to the fertility doctor, and getting my firizre to get to do something about this yearning. We are very much in love. I don't get "punished" as you all call it, but God still loves, and blesses us.

Dearest Amber,

Why would you choose such an ineffective way to fight your barren state? A 'fertility doctor'? Probably an atheist, and an expensive one. There is a much more effective and simple answer!

PRAYER!



Genesis 21:2
For Sarah conceived, and bare Abraham a son in his old age, at the set time of which God had spoken to him.

If Jesus can make an almost centenarian withered woman fertile again with His miraculous virility, your problem should be a piece of cake for His powers. Trust Jesus!




Yours in Christ,

Elmer

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

My name is Amber. I have been married a year. We are struggling to have children, because of my health conditions. I'm fine with going to the fertility doctor, and getting my firizre to get to do something about this yearning. We are very much in love. I don't get "punished" as you all call it, but God still loves, and blesses us.

He's "blessed" you with a barren womb and your husband with corrupted seed...sounds like you have fallen from His favor.

[Amberd7521]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

My name is Amber. I have been married a year. We are struggling to have children, because of my health conditions. I'm fine with going to the fertility doctor, and getting my firizre to get to do something about this yearning. We are very much in love. I don't get "punished" as you all call it, but God still loves, and blesses us.

[Witch Hammer]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

Lets all just marry guerillas

Suit yourself, pervert.

[The Lord's Hammer]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

I think it's something good, everyone should have the opportunity to marry the person they love, as long as the two of them agree with getting married

You cant be serious. Lets all just marry guerillas and dolphins willy nilly.

Its horrible and putrid that you condone the at of man and beast. You must pray hard tonight.

Such a shame.

[Pastor Ezekiel]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

I think it's something good, everyone should have the opportunity to marry the person they love, as long as the two of them agree with getting married

So you think a man should be allowed to "marry" a camel or a goat?

People like you make Jesus and me want to puke.

[AroundTheLooneyBin]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

Brother, I'm sure you've heard the atrocity of the "Supreme" Court Justice. Our church compounds have doubled security with all these "marriages" . I pray that Jesus comes soon!

I think it's something good, everyone should have the opportunity to marry the person they love, as long as the two of them agree with getting married

[Mrs. Elizabeth Johnson]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

NO GAY WEDDINGS! OK??? That's all I have to say about that.

Brother, I'm sure you've heard the atrocity of the "Supreme" Court Justice. Our church compounds have doubled security with all these "marriages" . I pray that Jesus comes soon!

[bestman]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

I'm soooooo excited!

I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.

I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.

GLORY!!!!!

your cousin is a bad woman it looks like she's already 8 months pregnant
I would beat her every day because she misbehaves

[Claire]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

I'm soooooo excited!

I LOVE anything WEDDING!!! Here is a vid I took last year at my cousin Velma's wedding.

I was baffled that her son was born 8 months early and still weighed 6 1/2 lbs. See!! JESUS really does provide miracles for his Chosen.

GLORY!!!!!

It is physically impossible for a baby to be born 8 months early and be 6.5 lbs. At 1 month, a fetus is only 0.25 inches long.

[ChivasRegal]

Re: Welcome to Wedding Bells!

Oh Christmas baking is so fun! I love it, we can make fudge to go with the eggnog!

Glory to God