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  • Boring Jerry
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
    • May 2008
    • 225

    #31
    Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

    Than why did God make it feel good?

    Comment

    • Daisy Mae Johnson
      The Future Mrs. Ezekiel Flint
      Voted Best Pies in Freehold 10 Years Running
      aka the Biblethumpin Blonde
      True Christian™
      • Sep 2006
      • 15708

      #32
      Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

      Originally posted by Alex_B View Post
      Than why did God make it feel good?
      He created the "climax" so negroes would know when to stop humping.

      Who said it feels good?
      sigpic

      Tweet me Here
      My GODLY Bio Here

      Comment

      • Old Iron Crotch
        SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
        • May 2007
        • 3056

        #33
        Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

        Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
        He created the "climax" so negroes would know when to stop humping.

        Who said it feels good?

        If it doesn't feel good, you're doing it wrong.
        Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

        Comment

        • SUV
          True Christian™ Princess
          The Driving Force behind RA12
          Have at it, anytime!
          • Sep 2006
          • 11027

          #34
          Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

          Originally posted by BibleThumpinBlonde View Post
          He created the "climax" so negroes would know when to stop humping.

          Who said it feels good?
          I guess you told her, Sister Thumper

          Get ready to run if she begins quoting that joo Co-hen again. JESUS!

          Comment

          • Boring Jerry
            Confirmed Enemy of God
            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
            • May 2008
            • 225

            #35
            Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

            Were you talking about me or "Lumpy"? Because if it was me, I am a man. Not a woman.

            Comment

            • SUV
              True Christian™ Princess
              The Driving Force behind RA12
              Have at it, anytime!
              • Sep 2006
              • 11027

              #36
              Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

              Originally posted by Alex_B View Post
              Were you talking about me or "Lumpy"? Because if it was me, I am a man. Not a woman.
              You quote Co-hen too?

              Sweet Cheeses, is there no Mercy at all to be found at all on this board today?

              Comment

              • Buford T Scoggins
                Founder, Operation Rescue, Now in Heaven with Jesus
                True Christian™
                • Aug 2007
                • 911

                #37
                Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                Ah, this discussion brings back such sweet memories of my "first time."

                I have to admit, I was a bit of a klutz that night. Both of us were, but I think it was more difficult for Daisy Mae. She wasn't real willing to do the deed. In fact, she wasn't real willing to get married in the first place, seeing how she was just 13. But her parents needed the money real bad after their farm went bust, so $2000 later and it was all agreed. Daisy Mae put up a fuss at first, but after me and my brothers forced her to swallow a full jug of Thunderbird (the funnel helped), she calmed down. I did have a little trouble with her a few hours later when she woke up, naked and tied to the bed, but fortunately I kept a baseball bat nearby (an old trick I learned from my daddy) - a few little "love taps" and she shut right up.

                It was such a romantic night - I'll never forget it. Daisy Mae sure never forgot it - after her self-induced abortion, she escaped and has been going 'round the country giving speeches to those feminazi groups, telling them all the personal details of our lovely wedding night. I'd like to whoop her ass if I ever see her again, though that probably won't happen due to the lesbian body guards she's now got. All I can do is pray that she'll accept Jesus and come back to me, the only True Christian man who ever loved her.

                Maybe some of you LandOver ladies can give me some advice on how I can win her heart back. If it wasn't for the restraining order, I'd slip her some roofies and bring her home.

                YIC,
                Buford
                yours in Christ,
                Brother Buford

                sigpic

                The only way to reduce the number of nuclear weapons is to use them.
                - Rush Limbaugh

                Comment

                • Old Iron Crotch
                  SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
                  • May 2007
                  • 3056

                  #38
                  Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                  Originally posted by Buford T Scoggins View Post
                  Ah, this discussion brings back such sweet memories of my "first time."

                  I have to admit, I was a bit of a klutz that night. Both of us were, but I think it was more difficult for Daisy Mae. She wasn't real willing to do the deed. In fact, she wasn't real willing to get married in the first place, seeing how she was just 13. But her parents needed the money real bad after their farm went bust, so $2000 later and it was all agreed. Daisy Mae put up a fuss at first, but after me and my brothers forced her to swallow a full jug of Thunderbird (the funnel helped), she calmed down. I did have a little trouble with her a few hours later when she woke up, naked and tied to the bed, but fortunately I kept a baseball bat nearby (an old trick I learned from my daddy) - a few little "love taps" and she shut right up.

                  It was such a romantic night - I'll never forget it. Daisy Mae sure never forgot it - after her self-induced abortion, she escaped and has been going 'round the country giving speeches to those feminazi groups, telling them all the personal details of our lovely wedding night. I'd like to whoop her ass if I ever see her again, though that probably won't happen due to the lesbian body guards she's now got. All I can do is pray that she'll accept Jesus and come back to me, the only True Christian man who ever loved her.

                  Maybe some of you LandOver ladies can give me some advice on how I can win her heart back. If it wasn't for the restraining order, I'd slip her some roofies and bring her home.

                  YIC,
                  Buford
                  So you forced a child to marry against her will, poisoned her, tied her up, raped her, and beat her senseless, and you call that love?
                  No wonder she left you.
                  Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

                  Comment

                  • Shadow
                    Confirmed Enemy of God
                    BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                    • Jun 2008
                    • 8

                    #39
                    Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                    Its good not to be tied down by religion. Im able to express love how I want, why would 'god' have a rule about not have sex before marriage? Im 16, having sex with my girlfriend, and wait for it... Im not burning! I think ye're just missing out! Cmon, live your life!

                    Comment

                    • SUV
                      True Christian™ Princess
                      The Driving Force behind RA12
                      Have at it, anytime!
                      • Sep 2006
                      • 11027

                      #40
                      Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                      Oh, look at you two, kissy-kissy

                      Comment

                      • Shadow
                        Confirmed Enemy of God
                        BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                        • Jun 2008
                        • 8

                        #41
                        Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                        Originally posted by SUV View Post
                        Oh, look at you two, kissy-kissy
                        Very mature

                        Comment

                        • Old Iron Crotch
                          SATAN'S FAVORITE BONIFIED PERVERT!
                          • May 2007
                          • 3056

                          #42
                          Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                          Originally posted by Shadow View Post
                          Its good not to be tied down by religion. Im able to express love how I want, why would 'god' have a rule about not have sex before marriage? Im 16, having sex with my girlfriend, and wait for it... Im not burning! I think ye're just missing out! Cmon, live your life!

                          As long as you're both of legal age to give informed consent, go for it.

                          Just be sure to use a condom every time - the last thing you want at your age is to become parents!
                          Now that Obama has won the election there will be big black cock for every white woman!!!

                          Comment

                          • Shadow
                            Confirmed Enemy of God
                            BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                            • Jun 2008
                            • 8

                            #43
                            Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                            Ya 16 is legal here.
                            & I agree about the condoms, too young to be parents.
                            Wow theres actually a sane person on here!

                            Comment

                            • AubreyO'Connel
                              Confirmed Enemy of God
                              BANNED from Landover -- Aeternal Damnation Assured
                              • Jun 2008
                              • 7

                              #44
                              Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                              Im like 16.. and ive had sex 7 times.. ride em and leave em, thats how i see it.. and all ye people waitin till your marriage.. what you are really sayin is, you couldnt get a woman cos u were the outcast, haha virgins are funny lil loner people hahaha

                              Comment

                              • Bob4God
                                Moderator
                                Arms Dealer for CHRIST
                                Hands folded for Jesus
                                 
                                • Apr 2008
                                • 5274

                                #45
                                Re: "First Night" Advice* *Adults Only!

                                Originally posted by AubreyO'Connel View Post
                                ..haha virgins are funny lil loner people hahaha
                                Are you saying the LORD JESUS is funny?
                                sigpic
                                The eyes of the LORD are in every place, beholding the evil and the good.
                                - Proverbs 15:3

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                                CHRISTIAN ADVICE AND MESSAGES OF HOPE! GOD'S GREATEST HITS!


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