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  • Johny Joe Hold
    Mayor of Freehold
     
    • Feb 2010
    • 13107

    #1

    Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

    Another Warm Good Evening to You Friends,

    What I have on my mind this evening might be called a dilemma. It is this: How can we in Freehold remain true to our religious convictions, yet remain a modern city, youthful in its outlook?

    I have good news. It is possible. Indeed, it is happening as I speak.

    First, let me provide a light hearted example. Have you ever noticed that none of our pastors has grey hair? These youthful looking and energetic men have nary a whisp of grey in their magnificant coiffures. Now, of course, you and I know why they show no grey. Let's keep it our own little secret. What I'm saying is that they set the tone for a modern and youthful City.

    But, let me discuss a more serious trait of a modern city. Last evening I decided to knock on some doors and visit with folks about the upcoming election for Mayor. A nice couple invited me in for coffee. We sat down in the living room where their two boys were playing a game on the family TV. What I learned gave me great optimism for Freehold.

    The boys were playing with a Wii, an electronic game that lets you simulate other games, such as tennis and bowling. These boys were simulating something much more educational and worthwhile. They were simulating a war against the Devil using AK47's. Before the game started, there were detailed instructions on how load and fire this weapon-for-God. During the simulation, there were instructions on how to kill people most effectively.

    To think that right here in a Freehold home, children could be trained in weapon use that might someday be needed to fight off our own federal govnerment was wonderful to behold. It gave me confidence that we in Freehold can have it all, a faith based local government and a modern technology.

    Thank you for this visit.

    Johny Joe Hold
    Candidate for Mayor
    Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.
  • Jacob the Angry Liar
    Confirmed Enemy of God
    • Jan 2010
    • 309

    #2
    Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

    Everyone knows video games cause demons to enter the rectum, especially slant ones like "Wii". If we were to have our children use this system, we would have to create a True Christian™ version that is properly exorsized and made in God's Favorite Country, the Godly US of A.

    Comment

    • Johny Joe Hold
      Mayor of Freehold
       
      • Feb 2010
      • 13107

      #3
      Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

      Originally posted by Jacob11 View Post
      Everyone knows video games cause demons to enter the rectum, especially slant ones like "Wii". If we were to have our children use this system, we would have to create a True Christian™ version that is properly exorsized and made in God's Favorite Country, the Godly US of A.
      I'm sure you are right, Brother, about the off-the-shelf units. My impression was that this one had been modified to meet the True Christian (TM) specs. The boys were playing Murder the Devil.
      Isaiah 24:1-3 Behold, the LORD maketh the earth empty (2)...as the taker of usury, so with the giver of usury to him. (3) The land shall be utterly emptied, and utterly spoiled: for the LORD hath spoken his word.

      Comment

      • Alfred King
        Unsaved trash, race-mixing nigra
        • Feb 2010
        • 398

        #4
        Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

        Johny Joe Hold, why are you actively promoting Japanese products like the Wii? Why do you not promote American products like the XBOX 360 instead?
        The 100% SURE winner of the Freehold 2024 election. Let's make Freehold GREAT again!
        • Godfly: "TrueChristian™ friends. Maybe the things Mr. King says are true."
        • Johny Joe Hold: "my worthy opponent may have some admirable traits"
        • C. Reconstruction: "you are sincere"
        NOT endorsed by Donald Trump!

        Comment

        • Cranky Old Man
          Trying to out-Methuselah Methuselah
          You kids get off his lawn!
           
          • Jan 2010
          • 22380

          #5
          Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

          Originally posted by Johny Joe Hold View Post
          These boys were simulating something much more educational and worthwhile. They were simulating a war against the Devil using AK47's. Before the game started, there were detailed instructions on how load and fire this weapon-for-God. During the simulation, there were instructions on how to kill people most effectively.
          Why a simulation? Why not learn them with real weapons? I learned all my sons and grandsons how to use a gun and most of them are quite good at it. I have to admit sometimes one of them damaged a toe or two, but that is just an excellent lesson to get the right kind of respect for guns.
          5 Reasons why GOD HATES WOMEN!
          To most "Christians" The Bible is like a license agreement. They just scroll to the bottom and click "I agree". All those "Christians" will burn in Hell!
          James 2:10 "For whosoever shall keep the whole law, and yet offend in one point, he is guilty of all."

          Comment

          • Miss Cassandra
            Unsaved trash, Hellbound witch slut
            • Feb 2010
            • 369

            #6
            Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

            Mr. Hold, you're a hypocrite and a liar, and are not even a "true christian," as your cronies seem to believe. You have EXPOSED yourself!

            Tha fact is, mr. Hold, the Nintendo Wii, of which you promote the use now, has been denounced by "true christians" multiple times of this forum.

            In this thread, Wide-Open and Nobar King condemn the use of the Nintendo Wii.

            But in this thread, the Wii is condemned by:

            - Wide-Open
            - Temperance
            - Talitha
            - O' Hanley
            - Pastor Ezekiel
            - Nobar King
            - Thumper

            And another nice thread full of "true christians" condemning the Wii, including, in addition to the people who posted already in the previous thread:

            - Glendora
            - Juliette
            - Bobby-Joe
            - Jeb Thurmond
            - WilliamJenningsBryan
            - Bathfire

            How are you going to explain this to these people?

            Seeing that you fundamentally disagree with virtually all "true christians" on this forum, and are hated by any non-true-christian person in Freehold what makes you think you will have any chance of becoming mayor of Freehold?
            An it harm none, do what thou wilt.

            And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honour and humility, mirth and reverence within you.


            Why I'm no longer a Christian: how the Landover Baptist Church ruined my life!

            Comment

            • Mrs. Mary Whitford
              Ladies of Landover Senior VP
              One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
              Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
              True Christian™
              • Dec 2006
              • 12414

              #7
              Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

              Nice try, harlot, but "Wii-gate" isn't going to get any traction in the media!
              Posted via Prayer

              1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
              Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

              Blogging for CHRIST!
              Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
              All a-Twitter for Salvation!
              Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
              On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
              My Ladies of Landover profile!

              Comment

              • Miss Cassandra
                Unsaved trash, Hellbound witch slut
                • Feb 2010
                • 369

                #8
                Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                Originally posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
                Nice try, harlot, but "Wii-gate" isn't going to get any traction in the media!
                Well, I see you didn't really put forth any objection against the introduction of Wii's in the living rooms of Freehold. Do your liberal catholic tendencies play up again, that you support Hold against the Pastors of Landover?
                An it harm none, do what thou wilt.

                And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honour and humility, mirth and reverence within you.


                Why I'm no longer a Christian: how the Landover Baptist Church ruined my life!

                Comment

                • Mrs. Mary Whitford
                  Ladies of Landover Senior VP
                  One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
                  Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
                  True Christian™
                  • Dec 2006
                  • 12414

                  #9
                  Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                  Originally posted by Miss Cassandra View Post
                  Well, I see you didn't really put forth any objection against the introduction of Wii's in the living rooms of Freehold. Do your liberal catholic tendencies play up again, that you support Hold against the Pastors of Landover?
                  Once again, basic reading comprehension eludes you (which wouldn't happen if you'd practice reading with a good book like, say, The Good Book).
                  Originally posted by Johny Joe Hold View Post
                  My impression was that this one had been modified to meet the True Christian ™ specs. The boys were playing Murder the Devil.
                  Mr. Hold has fully explained the situation. It's no different than the Play Stations the church gives away to youngsters who accept Jesus as their personal Savior.
                  Like the rest of the "Gotcha!" media, you fail in trying to find anything wrong with good, decent Republican candidates so you have to manufacture controversy from nothing.
                  Posted via Prayer

                  1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
                  Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

                  Blogging for CHRIST!
                  Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
                  All a-Twitter for Salvation!
                  Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
                  On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
                  My Ladies of Landover profile!

                  Comment

                  • Miss Cassandra
                    Unsaved trash, Hellbound witch slut
                    • Feb 2010
                    • 369

                    #10
                    Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                    Originally posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
                    Once again, basic reading comprehension eludes you (which wouldn't happen if you'd practice reading with a good book like, say, The Good Book).

                    Mr. Hold has fully explained the situation. It's no different than the Play Stations the church gives away to youngsters who accept Jesus as their personal Savior.
                    Like the rest of the "Gotcha!" media, you fail in trying to find anything wrong with good, decent Republican candidates so you have to manufacture controversy from nothing.
                    Don't be silly.

                    1. Mould clearly tried to cover up his misstep when Jacob pointed this out to him. If it really were modified, why didn't he tell that directly to prevent rumors?

                    2. The people I quoted denounced the Wii as evil and satanic. How can you modify such a thing into a less evil and satanic thing, according to your logic? After all, the third thread was started by Pastor Zeke, and was named: ALERT: "'Wii' is oriental for: "I'm having an orgasm." And we all know how much Zeke knows about the Japanese language.
                    So, if that Wii was modified, why wasn't the name modified? Your logic fails at all points, I'm afraid. Clearly, Mould has an agenda even his cronies know nothing about. Though I must admit, watching you being fooled by this guy is really funny!
                    An it harm none, do what thou wilt.

                    And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honour and humility, mirth and reverence within you.


                    Why I'm no longer a Christian: how the Landover Baptist Church ruined my life!

                    Comment

                    • Mrs. Mary Whitford
                      Ladies of Landover Senior VP
                      One of the Truest Christians™ Ever
                      Mama Grizzly and formerly Sister Mary Maria
                      True Christian™
                      • Dec 2006
                      • 12414

                      #11
                      Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                      Originally posted by Miss Cassandra View Post
                      How can you modify such a thing into a less evil and satanic thing
                      PROOF of your atheistic liberal agenda! ALL THINGS are possible through OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST! Yet here are you questioning and denying the power of the Almighty to make even a slant video game machine clean though the power of prayer and His guidance of Landover's True Christian(tm) technicians!
                      This persecution you're attempting is getting more and more pathetic each time. You really should try to find another bone to chew on, because there is nothing there with this one!
                      Posted via Prayer

                      1 Timothy 2:13-15 For Adam was first formed, then Eve. And Adam was not deceived, but the woman being deceived was in the transgression. Notwithstanding she shall be saved in childbearing, if they continue in faith and charity and holiness with sobriety.
                      Bearing my husband's heirs and being SAVED!

                      Blogging for CHRIST!
                      Witnessing for GOD on YouTube!
                      All a-Twitter for Salvation!
                      Bringing Jesus to MySpace!
                      On FIRE for the Lord on Facebook!
                      My Ladies of Landover profile!

                      Comment

                      • Rev. M. Rodimer
                        Honorary True Christian™
                        Forum Member
                        • May 2008
                        • 13996

                        #12
                        Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                        Cassandra, you have no idea how much it pains me to say this.

                        My Left Shoe says, "Thank you, beautiful lady, for exposing the Truth about Jonny Toe Nail's possession by anally-inserted Wii Demons. I like the cut of your jib. Would you like to join my team as PR consultant and abandon that pseudo-progressive Alfred Sharpton?"
                        Bible boring? Nonsense!
                        Try Bible in a Year with Brother V, or join Shirlee and the kids as they discuss Real Bible Stories!
                        You can't be a Christian if you don't know God's Word!

                        Comment

                        • John Scopes
                          Unsaved Trash, Monkey worshiping Darwinista
                          • Sep 2009
                          • 666

                          #13
                          Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                          Originally posted by Rev. M. Rodimer View Post
                          Cassandra, you have no idea how much it pains me to say this.

                          My Left Shoe says, "Thank you, beautiful lady, for exposing the Truth about Jonny Toe Nail's possession by anally-inserted Wii Demons. I like the cut of your jib. Would you like to join my team as PR consultant and abandon that pseudo-progressive Alfred Sharpton?"
                          In spite of the fact I have initially supported the australopithecus africanus I am afraid I am beginning to waver toward the left shoe.

                          Cassandra, as a nubile young female I understand your attraction to Al. Your hormonal drive is strong, and his endowment provided by nature is an evolutionary trait that eventually resulted in producing all of us.

                          That fact however does not necessarily make him the ideal candidate.
                          sigpic
                          “Ignorance more frequently begets confidence than does knowledge: it is those who know little, and not those who know much, who so positively assert that this or that problem will never be solved by science.” Charles Darwin The Descent of Man (1871)

                          Comment

                          • Miss Cassandra
                            Unsaved trash, Hellbound witch slut
                            • Feb 2010
                            • 369

                            #14
                            Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                            Originally posted by Sister Mary Maria View Post
                            PROOF of your atheistic liberal agenda! ALL THINGS are possible through OUR LORD, JESUS CHRIST! Yet here are you questioning and denying the power of the Almighty to make even a slant video game machine clean though the power of prayer and His guidance of Landover's True Christian™ technicians!
                            This persecution you're attempting is getting more and more pathetic each time. You really should try to find another bone to chew on, because there is nothing there with this one!
                            Oh, stop denying obvious facts, Maria. You shied away from my second, and much more important point, of course. If the thing was changed, it wouldn't be a Wii anymore, according to Pastor Zeke. So you have to choose between Zeke and Hold on this issue.
                            An it harm none, do what thou wilt.

                            And therefore let there be beauty and strength, power and compassion, honour and humility, mirth and reverence within you.


                            Why I'm no longer a Christian: how the Landover Baptist Church ruined my life!

                            Comment

                            • Pastor Ezekiel
                              Putting the "stud" back in Bible Study
                               
                              • Sep 2006
                              • 78556

                              #15
                              Re: Johny Joe Hold, Fireside Chat #3

                              Originally posted by Miss Cassandra View Post
                              Oh, stop denying obvious facts, Maria. You shied away from my second, and much more important point, of course. If the thing was changed, it wouldn't be a Wii anymore, according to Pastor Zeke. So you have to choose between Zeke and Hold on this issue.
                              Brother Hold has my full support. Just because you are incapable of wrapping your drug-addled, feeble female mind around God's Divine Will, it doesn't mean you can toss around these libelous accusations.

                              Somebody needs a good Christian spanking.
                              Who Will Jesus Damn?

                              Here is a partial list from just a few scripture verses:

                              Hypocrites (Matthew 24:51), The Unforgiving (Mark 11:26), Homosexuals (Romans 1:26, 27), Fornicators (Romans 1:29), The Wicked (Romans 1:29), The Covetous (Romans 1:29), The Malicious (Romans 1:29), The Envious (Romans 1:29), Murderers (Romans 1:29), The Deceitful (Romans 1:29), Backbiters (Romans 1:30), Haters of God (Romans 1:30), The Despiteful (Romans 1:30), The Proud (Romans 1:30), Boasters (Romans 1:30), Inventors of evil (Romans 1:30), Disobedient to parents (Romans 1:30), Covenant breakers (Romans 1:31), The Unmerciful (Romans 1:31), The Implacable (Romans 1:31), The Unrighteous (1Corinthians 6:9), Idolaters (1Corinthians 6:9), Adulterers (1Corinthians 6:9), The Effeminate (1Corinthians 6:9), Thieves (1Corinthians 6:10), Drunkards (1Corinthians 6:10), Reviler (1Corinthians 6:10), Extortioners (1Corinthians 6:10), The Fearful (Revelation 21:8), The Unbelieving (Revelation 21:8), The Abominable (Revelation 21:8), Whoremongers (Revelation 21:8), Sorcerers (Revelation 21:8), All Liars (Revelation 21:8)

                              Need Pastoral Advice? Contact me privately at PastorEzekiel@landoverbaptist.net TODAY!!

                              Comment

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